Possible introductory pieces of wordsmithery to lead off this post – “not worth nyuk-ing about!” or even “better than a poke in the eye!” or possibly a longer rife on the use of “just say Moe” as the film’s tagline. Yet all of those cracks at humor are rendered absolutely and starkly unnecessary by this first trailer for the Farrelly Brothers‘ The Three Stooges, which is so painfully unfunny that it makes even related humor feel useless. The Farrellys have been wanting to make a Stooges feature film for years, proclaiming it a passion project, but its journey to the screen has been filled with its own pratfalls and slams to the face – development delays and huge casting issues abounded. The film was originally rumored to star Jim Carrey, Benicico del Toro, and Sean Penn, but when they all dropped the project, other potential casting options were mentioned and reported, including Hank Azaria, Johnny Knoxville, Andy Samberg, and Shane Jacobson. Which doesn’t explain how we ended up with a cast that includes Chris Diamantopoulos as Moe Howard, Sean Hayes as Larry Fine, and Will Sasso as Curly Howard. And Snooki is there, because why not make something that looks terrible look even more bogglingly awful? If you don’t value your eyes, your soul, or the possibility that Hollywood would greenlight an original and creative project, check out the first trailer for The Three Stooges after the break.

This is so much better than The Three Stooges. Having wrapped that “dream project,” it looks like Peter and Bobby Farrelly are interested in working on a film that, oh, I don’t know, people might actually want to see? Getting back to their glory days, the Farrellys have set a pair of writers to pen a Dumb and Dumber sequel. We will all gracefully bow our heads and tip our orange top hats forward to have a brief moment of silence for that other sequel, the abomination known as Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd, 2003′s horrific prequel that starred Eric Christian Olsen and Derek Richardson as Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne in their high school years. Shia LaBeouf also starred as another student (fun trivia!). The entire film centered on a pervasive lie that Lloyd, Harry, the ol’ Beefster, and a bunch of other kids were actually mentally challenged. Hilarious, right? Everyone loves making fun of mentally challenged kids! Ugh. Forgetting that nightmare, Sean Anders and John Morris have been hired to pen the sequel. The hope is to bring back both Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels, which answers the “but when will this potential sequel take place?” question quite handily. Nowish!

The Farrelly Brothers return to comedy with the film Hall Pass. Some may say they never left the genre, but those people haven’t seen The Heartbreak Kid. If you want to determine whether Hall Pass is a triumphant return or if it strikes out like a 40-year-old fat dude at a bar trying to hit on a sorority chick, check it out with this drinking game. We guarantee that it will help you get in someone’s pants… even if those pants are your own.

Respect has to be given to anyone moving forward on a terrible idea with such gusto. The Three Stooges is a monumentally dumb idea, especially considering the legacy left by the trio in comedy, but if you’re going to blow the goat, you might as well go all out while doing it. The latest piece of absurdity comes from Deadline Poughkeepsie, which reports that Larry David will don the habit to play Mother Mengele for the picture. Because nothing says screwball comedy like dressing a Jewish man in a Catholic garb and giving him the last name of a Nazi who made lamps out of people. Instead of this, can’t The Farrelly Brothers just remake Doctor Death: Seeker of Souls or something?

It’s unclear whether a Three Stooges biopic was ever a really good idea. The trio are the icons you don’t go messing around with (like in twenty years when a Monty Python biopic starts circling around) because it’s tough to get people to play geniuses. Even when you get insanely lucky with casting (like Jamal Woolard as Notorious B.I.G.), the result can still be a fairly average movie. So why try it? That’s a great question, but apparently it’s something that The Farrelly Brothers have to get out of their system. Unfortunately, we’ve seen in real time how difficult it can be to get a movie off the ground and what happens when you’re not quite sticking the landing. At one point, this film saw Jim Carrey, Benecio Del Toro, and Sean Penn attached – and that, absolutely, would have made for an interesting film. Maybe not a good one, but it would have been a train ride and/or wreck to remember. Now, the casting has been reduced to minor television stars. That’s not a pejorative at all. Television acting is difficult, but it’s not the same kind of acting that a film requires. In terms of sheer talent, it seems like the B team has been called off the benches. Will Sasso is already locked as Curly, and now Variety is reporting that Sean Hayes (from Will and Grace) will be playing Larry. This project was always a head-scratcher, but now it looks like compromise is going to kill [Due to Content Scraping and Theft, we have been forced to try abbreviated feeds. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and woud very much appreciate you clicking through to view the full article on FilmSchoolRejects.com]

Like an antidote for all that stuffy Oscar nonsense, the Farrelly Brothers have let fly that they’re interested in revisiting the world of Dumb & Dumber. Maybe that will finally wake James Franco up. Fortunately, in an interview with Movie Hole, The Farrellys not only claimed that conversations had been put in motion to make the sequel a reality, they added that they’d only want to do it with Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels back in the roles. Thus, the Farrelly Brothers joined a long line of filmmakers who had a terrible idea and a great idea at the same time. There’s no demand for this movie beyond a new-found love of outdated sequels floating around the studio system. However, if there’s a creative demand, and the Farrelly Brothers have a great story cooked up, why not support something like this? We’re nearly two decades away from the 1994 comedic triumph, it would be interesting to see the directors go back to their first film, and if they got the talent, it could be another strange trip into a world of idiots. Speaking of which, The Farrelly Brothers will begin shooting their Three Stooges flick in a few months, which means definitive casting will be announced sooner rather than later. Check back with us to have your day made/ruined. Any bets on whether Lauren Holly is available for this?

This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr snubs his nose at all the films up for the Oscar in order to enjoy the R-rated smorgasbord that is available in the theaters. He kisses his wife and takes six days off from marriage, just like Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis in Hall Pass. He takes those six days to find a fast car so he can Drive Angry, following Amber Heard and her short shorts in 3D. Apparently no one told him she’s a lesbian now.

Whether you’re trying to avoid the releases this week or augment them with even more movie, Your Alternate Box Office offers some options for movies that would play perfectly alongside of (or instead of) the stuff studios are shoving into the megaplex this weekend. This week features Nic Cage driving straight outta Hell, two jackasses trying as hard as they can to cheat on their wives, and a love triangle from Canada.

The Farrelly Brothers return to R-rated adult comedy in a sometimes naughty but mainly soft-hearted touch about marriage, suburban hell, and fidelity in Hall Pass. Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis exemplify their body of comedic work here as the slacker Rich and hyperactive Fred, two good-natured 40-plus year-old men living the middle class life in New England. They have the cars, the houses, the children, and wives of the American dream but feel the need to break out of this mundane existence. Luckily for them, their wives (played by Jenna Fischer and Christiana Applegate) allow them a week off of marriage in order to see what they do with a week of freedom.

Like false reports of the last golden ticket being taken, a rumor went floating around through the world last week pinning Johnny Knoxville and Andy Samberg to the project as top contenders. Apparently they haven’t even auditioned. Peter Farrelly cleared up the air, telling EW that Three Stooges casting is still open to everyone – even those without any acting resumes. The project starts shooting in mid-April, so you’d better hustle, but if you’re dying to get two fingers shoved in your eyes, you’ve still got a chance at opening up that Wonka Bar and making your way into the factory.

The white water rafting trip through development that was The Three Stooges has landed The Farrelly Brothers (and all seven people waiting with goosebumps to see what will happen) here, in a world where they have no huge stars in their project. On the one hand, that’s a disaster. On the other, creating iconic characters can sometimes be easier with unknown actors. On that first hand, the casting director now has to deal with every moron that thinks he’s funny or does a “great Curly, I swear to God,” coming before them to prove their worth. With any luck, they’ll broadcast the worst and the most bizarre auditions American Idol style before the movie. Or maybe those terrible auditions are the movie. Either way, if you’d like to become the next Stooge, here’s what they are looking for.

After being passed from Columbia to Warners to MGM and now to Fox, The Three Stooges looked more like the ball in a rugby highlight than a passion project. It also caused a lot of head scratching when Jim Carrey, Sean Penn and Benecio Del Toro were all involved. According to Deadline El Paso, that head scratching can continue (even though a new cast will need to be found) because the judge-approved MGM bankruptcy plan has caused the project to land in Fox’s lap with the Farrelly Brothers still on board to direct. On the one hand, it’s nice to see iconic relics of the Vaudeville generation getting a modern treatment. On the other, casting avatars for the spirit of Larry, Curly, and Moe will be almost as impossible as casting John Belushi for that promised biopic. Actually, it will be harder. Celebrating a life is one thing, but taking over the roles for a brand new fictional feature is another. Hopefully the Peter and Bobby Farrelly are both scratching their own heads (respectively) wondering who on the planet they can possibly rope into the roles. Also to consider: what does this mean for their long-fabled Happy the Hedgehog movie that the theaters keep teasing us about?

At the center of the Farrelly Brothers’ newest film, Hall Pass, is a fundamental question about relationships. At least, it’s the kind of fundamental question that might get someone slapped. Is Olive Garden or Applebee’s the best place to meet hot, horny women? Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis seek to answer that question when they’re wives give them a Hall Pass (or a Kitchen Pass if you’re nasty) – total freedom from marriage for a week. From the looks of the trailer, the women (played by Jenna Fischer and Christina Applegate) are doing it to prove a point about male delusion, and it’ll probably be completely harmless until someone gets hurt. There’s some clever moments amidst the generic (a pot brownie sequence? Really?), but the film at least hints at going off the rails a bit. No word yet on if anyone’s scrotum gets caught in a zipper.

Oscar-winner and potential stooge Sean Penn has decided to take some time off, meaning that the Farrelly Brothers will have to find a new Larry and Universal will need to find a new lead for its thriller Cartel.

Earlier today Variety confirmed that MGM and the Farrelly brothers are closing in on their final cast for their upcoming comedy The Three Stooges. Now we’re interested to know what you think about it.

The plot is ridiculous, the characters largely unlikable, and the comedy is forced.