I was an English major in college and a product of the American educational system in general, so my knowledge of world events is understandably pretty vague. Thankfully a life spent watching movies has filled that void with historical facts I otherwise never would have known. Like how Mozart was killed by his rival, Saliari. And how Roman Emperor Commodus was a complete lech killed in front of a coliseum crowd. And how Hitler was gunned down in a theater by a squad of merciless American soldiers who couldn’t speak Italian if their lives depended on it. And how France was filled with big French pussies during World War II who rolled over and let the Germans take whatever and whoever they wanted. Okay, so that last one actually is true…