The last installment of the series just got an Oscar pedigree, and sees the return of its entire main cast.

I never — not in a million, gazillion years — thought I would type the above headline. But here we are. Record this date into history. I have been impressed by a trailer for a Twilight movie.

For weeks, we have been waiting with bated breath to see which director in Hollywood would be chosen to turn Twilight star Taylor Lautner into the next Jason Bourne. Now it looks like a multiple Academy Award nominee may help him get there.

It all begins with a choice, says the poster for The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. I’m certain that for some of you — many of our regular readers — that means the choice to completely ignore and avoid Twilight like the plague. And for good reason, there isn’t much in these movies for those who have not already been indoctrinated into the cult of Twilight. Yet for those who are, this concept of “choice” means a lot.

Today, we see the first trailer for Twilight: Eclipse, and it’s mostly just fan service. All of those broody teen superhumans (and unhumans) talking about how much they will fight, if the fight happens. It’s all very romantic, I suppose.

At this point, I feel like I’m making fun of this entire process. Perhaps I’m just trying to point out the absurdity of this marketing ploy — the releasing of a ten-second teaser that is teasing a teaser trailer which will go online tomorrow. It’s a little much, for any movie. The fact that it’s Twilight: Eclipse only makes it easier for the comment section below to get a little rowdy.

There’s no easy way to go about this little piece of news — I’ll just come right out with it. Summit Entertainment has announced that the first trailer for Twilight: Eclipse will debut online on Thursday (March 11) at around 6:00a PST / 9:00a EST. The contents of this 90-second teaser are being kept under wraps until it debuts, but we can tell you this: it will include Edward (Robert Pattinson), Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Jacob (Taylor Lautner).

There’s a really dirty joke about teenage girls and soccer moms here somewhere, but I’m resisting out of respect for Twilight fans. In fact, I’ve long thought that their fandom should be commended.

The good Dr. Abaius is known widely for his correspondence with Hollywood. And in his most recent letter, he lets director Garry Marshall — a man who has directed his fair share of romantic comedy gems — know what he thinks of his latest film, Valentine’s Day.

Listen up, Twilighters, because I’m only going to say this once. Nikki Finke has confirmed that the final book in Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight series, “Breaking Dawn,” will be broken into two films.

This week, on a very special episode of Reject Radio, Derrick Comedy member, author, and screenwriter D.C. Pierson answers the tough questions. Why would Jennifer Love Hewitt insure her breasts through Allstate?

Twilight star and all-around piece of meat Taylor Lautner has signed on to star in Universal’s upcoming toy-based film Stretch Armstrong, says Heat Vision. This 3D film will be made based on the line of Hasbro toys, and will likely make good money. Why? Because unlike his Twilight co-star Robert Pattinson, Lautner is seen as a bankable star.

What smells like money and workout sweat? According to the LA Times Hero Complex Blog, that smell is probably New Moon star Taylor Lautner’s potential next project: Max Steel.

I was always taught that if you’re going to do something, you might as well do it right. I also know that fans of popular books deserve movies that honor their favorites, not drag them down. Sadly, Twilight: New Moon isn’t honoring anyone.

Kevin Carr heads out to the movies this week, giving his take on New Moon, Planet 51, The Blind Side and Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” by Sapphire

Neil squeals about Team Jacob in his review of the highly anticipated The Twilight Saga: New Moon while Kevin struts around the Magical Studio in the Sky with no shirt on, desperately hoping people will mistake him for Taylor Lautner. There’s also a bizarre discussion of where Somali Pirates might fit into one of this week’s movies… how does that all work? Listen and find out!

The full theatrical trailer for Twilight: New Moon is here, and it’s forcing us to deal with more action, more big nasty dogs and more crazy-eyed Dakota Fannings than we ever thought possible.

The heat is building for the next Twilight movie, and with shirtless dudes who turn into wolves, I have a feeling that the fanbase is going to be more than pleased with this newly released teaser.

The trailer for Twilight: New Moon drops in theaters along with the Summit Entertainment release Bandslam on Friday. But before we can even get to that, we have to sit through a 14-second “trailer preview.”

A new gallery of photos from the upcoming Twilight sequel, New Moon, have appeared on our doorstep this morning. We feel the need to subject you to them.