Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema; now get off our lawn. This is the weekly internet bad movie column that gets winded as you scroll up and down the page. Every Friday I assault your senses with whatever terrible movie I happen to being using a coaster that week. I will pummel and pistol whip the movie with its own flaws–and a pistol apparently–until it can barely stand, but then I will congratulate the movie on its acceptance into the gang and lavish it with praise. I will then buy a beer and a disgustingly awesome snack food for the film as we stand as friends at the bar singing our gang’s…theme song (?). This week’s punk: Never Too Young to Die

This is two articles in a row in which I’ve had no choice but to write the word ‘sexy’ in the title. Tuesday is a good day. First it was the lovely Chuck star Yvonne Strahovski joining a movie that will certainly let the bullets fly. And now it’s John Stamos, who will appear as a secret friend to Emma Pillsbury (Jayma Mayes) on Glee. Because who doesn’t have a thing for John Stamos?

Neil is hob-nobbing around Park City, Utah with his flunkies, hoping to score some make-out moments with John Stamos or Garry Shandling. So, Kevin is left in the Magical Studio in the Sky with special guest host Kristin Dreyer Kramer from NightsAndWeekends.com to talk January releases.