What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly movie news column that melts in your mouth, not in your hand. It also delivers a taste that doesn’t linger. Because we know you need to sleep soon, and we don’t want to disrupt such an important ritual. Lets be honest with ourselves for a moment. Even though we know that it will be a kindred spirit of Zack Snyder’s 300, we still can’t escape from the fact that Tarsem Singh’s The Immortals looks pretty badass. The evidence of this is all over the place, most notably in a new gallery of Immortals images over at Screen Rant. Tonight’s lead image features Theseus, the hero, vs. a Minotaur. I’ll watch that.

It may be considered old news since it happened a whole week ago, but Disney passing on The Lone Ranger is a remarkably good sign. It’s noteworthy for more than the average news of the day because it hints at a crack in the current foundation of studio thinking. It’s barely ever publicized, since a studio refusing to make a film is hardly newsworthy, but a project this high-profile, featuring talent like Johnny Depp and Gore Verbinski, that’s been reported on so thoroughly used to be a done deal. Now, that’s not the case. It’s not like this is the end of the story crisis or anything, but it’s the Hollywood equivalent of a crack addict putting down the pipe, and it should be celebrated.

Ahoy! Yeah, I know that’s a lame way to start. Especially when you consider this week’s Commentary Commentary, our third, goes from essential classics like The Thing and Die Hard to Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. We’re not scraping the bottom of the barrel just yet, and even though Curse of the Black Pearl is by no means a bad movie, it just hasn’t reached a level of beloved nostalgia like our first two. Okay. Enough preamble. This DVD offers three separate commentaries featuring various members of the cast and crew, but rather than hear the insight Jack Davenport had to offer – we love you, Jack – it’s probably best to hear from the film’s director and star. So here, without any further waggery or warm-up, is what was learned from their commentary.

It was in early May that we reported Disney was ready to get another Pirates of the Caribbean film off the ground, but that the series’ star Johnny Depp wanted them to hold off a little bit. He seemed to want a chance to do other things, but also intimated that he would come back for a Pirates 5 only if the right director and script were in place. Well, just two months later, On Strange Tides has made one billion dollars at the box office and The Wrap is reporting that Depp is already in negotiations to appear in a fifth film. It’s amazing how fast a billion dollars can move things along. The Wrap seems to be talking to sources close to the production (their cousin knows this guy who knows a guy) and apparently a rough draft for Pirates 5 has already been written, and Jerry Bruckheimer and his team of chained up screenwriters are meeting 3 to 4 times a week to get it up to snuff and make sure that it passes muster with Captain Jack. Perhaps that’s a bit of overkill on Bruckheimer’s part. The fact that the last two had terrible scripts didn’t seem to deter anybody from making these movies or going to see them in droves. Screw Pirates 5, I’m already getting excited for Pirates 17. I just hope they can get Depp back for it.

Two-weeks or so after the release of the near-terrible Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, there’s already a list of directors that Disney is keen on to helm the fifth entry in the quality diving franchise. The list of filmmakers Disney is favoring is a bit surprising. There’s their top pick of Tim Burton, the always busy Sam Raimi, critical darling Alfonso Cuarón, Twilight 2 guy Chris Weitz, and the online venom drawer, Shawn Levy. Apparently an offer went out to Rob Marshall to return months ago, although he may be too busy with his Thin Man remake (*eye roll*)… Burton was rumored for the fourth film as well, but after Alice in Wonderland and Planet of the Apes, I don’t think I’ll ever be interested in seeing a big Burton action sequence ever again. And considering he’s currently working on Dark Shadows then Frankenweenie, he may be not have the time. Side note, when will see an original Burton film again?

Disney’s latest installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise arrived in theaters nationwide yesterday, and in keeping with all things peg-leggy and swashbuckly, I present selections from the On Stranger Tides press conference. Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Rob Marshall, Jerry Bruckheimer, Ian McShane and Geoffrey Rush were front and center for the press event, with moderator Pete Hammond at the helm. Here’s what they had to say.

What is Movie News After Dark? It’s probably the last great nightly movie news column you’ll ever read, seeing as tomorrow is the apocalypse. And since it’s the end of days, we’re keeping things simple around here. Just a little trip down relevant street with a few detours along the way. If we don’t see you on the other side, just know that we loved you all. Even you. Tom Cruise feels like the perfect guy to feature on this, the last ever edition of Movie News After Dark. For one, he and the church of Scientology must have something to do with why God hates us. Also, he’s just been confirmed for Horizons, the $100 million dollar sci-fi flick that Tron: Legacy director Joseph Kosinski has set up at Universal. Just when Cruise was starting to do awesome movies again, here comes the apocalypse to ruin it all. Thanks, L. Ron.

What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly movie news column that enjoys having Saturdays off. But it’s not Saturday yet, is it? That means it’s time for another round of the best movie-related links from around the web. So lets get on with it. We lead tonight with the first shot of Bruce Willis in Rian Johnson’s Looper, which includes a look at Willis likely eviscerating something or someone. This one comes to the world via Empire, who has promised that they will be bringing you some news from the set. I’ll read that.

Pirates of the Caribbean isn’t a comic book (unless they’ve put out supplemental comic books as part of a marketing blitz (which seems likely)), but the film franchise is now another official example of the new model being looked to by movie studios. First, it was Warners pointing their Batman to the bleachers with the news of rebooting the character before Nolan even rolls cameras on the next adventure. Now, the installments of Pirates that we knew we were getting are now officially going to be stand-alone stories. That may seem like a harmless announcement – or at least as harmless as more Rum-drunk Johnny Depp in mascara can be – but at the root of it is the promise of positioning the franchise to become another Batman who’s just become another Bond. Producer Jerry Bruckheimer claimed that test audiences loved the “freshness” of the new movie because it wasn’t really tethered to the previous installments. Thus, that same situation will carry over into the next films – ostensibly giving directors and writers the freedom to do whatever they want with what will become a stock character placed into zany new quests every few years.

At one point, George Clooney was among those rumored to play the titular role in Disney’s big screen adaptation of The Lone Ranger. Since then, we haven’t heard much about the project. In fact, producer Jerry Bruckheimer went as far as saying that they weren’t going to worry about it until they got a director. That was in 2008. They can now begin the search for a Ranger, as Gore Verbinski has been confirmed as director. Johnny Depp will still play Tonto, the film will likely hit theaters in 2012. The rest is to be determined. One thing we do know: Verbinski is definitely trying to give Tim Burton a run for his money in the “who can work with Johnny Depp the most this decade” competition. [The Wrap]

Carter and his crew get involved with a drug smuggling ring using flower delivery as a front. But this comes only days after Carter is nearly gunned down for being outed as a cop. This job will require the entire team and will end up being much bigger than any of them realize. At the same time, everyone tries to deal with their own relationships and by the end, Carter will make a call that will shock everyone to the bone. And so begins the two part season finale of Dark Blue.

Dean returns from his injury just in time for Carter, Alex and the rest of the team to get a murder case involving high end burglaries which they decide to take it on. But things go astray when Ty is taken hostage and suspected of being a snitch from the inside. Because of this, Carter and Alex’s take down gets blown to hell and they to are taken hostage by the burglars. Now it’s a race to beat the morning sun, otherwise no one is walking away alive. Jamie also becomes suspicious after meeting Ty’s new squeeze.

Carter, Rice and the rest of the Dark Blue team go after a man ripping off drug deals under the false identity of the DEA. But things take an unplanned turned when Jamie’s confidence is rattled after being assaulted by a perp that ended up being gunned down by Carter and Dean. Now she thinks the entire case rests on her shoulders. But just to make sure not all of his eggs are in one basket, Carter sends Ty and Dean to meet with an old – and very annoying – contact that will hopefully put the boys in with their mark.

Editor’s note: For those of you paying attention, Dark Blue is the Jerry Bruckheimer-produced cop show on TNT, and it should not be confused with the far more entertaining Canadian import, Rookie Blue, on ABC. The team gets word that a gun running extremist is in the planning stages of a major political assassination. So Carter, Rice, and the rest of team decide to break the extremist’s brother out of jail. But things don’t go as planned when a third member is thrown into the mix. Now it’s a race against the clock to see who will break first. Carter, the mark, or the third man who no one wanted to see.

Carter and Rice have been building their relationship for a while and things seem to be going well for them. But Carter isn’t to happy when he and his team are called in to investigate the murder of a 20 year old kid. The team figures out that he was murdered over a debt and now the team must infiltrate the inner workings of a casino and a local loan shark, in order to make a case. However, unbeknown to the rest of the team, Ty has gone into a deep depression after his wife leaves him. Now it’s Carter that stands between Ty and a career ending mistake after Ty loses $5,000 of the departments money at the black jack table. And Agent Rice must figure out a way to turn a local TV agent against his boss before another kid is murdered. But none of that is going to save Dark Blue from depths of awful television…

Carter goes undercover as a porn king that wants to expand his business into pharmaceuticals in order to bust the head of an important Mexican drug cartel . Meanwhile Dean gets involved in a complicated relationship with a drug dealer’s daughter. Major developments: That depends, does the complete lack of show quality count as a major development? What worked: There was this really brief, but awesome shoot out at the start of the third act. Can we get more of that? O, and those “hookers” were pretty hot, too bad they were all dressed up in nice cloths looking like goodie goodie porn stars. What didn’t: As you can probably tell by the extremely brief “What Worked” section, this episode sucked, and sucked hard.

Dark Blue is a crime drama that airs on TNT. From the big dog himself, Jerry Bruckheimer (his first, and so far only, cable television show). Dark Blue is all about Lt. Carter Shaw, the head of a deep cover unit of the LAPD. But this is no ordinary deep cover. This unit has next to no communication with brass and operates outside of standard operating procedure. His methods may be unorthodox, but you can’t argue with his results. Season one of Dark Blue was recently released on DVD from Warner Bros. and is available exclusively online. Season two just started airing on TNT, and we take a look at the first couple of episodes after the jump.

Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema; you should be ashamed.  That’s right, this is the internet column that makes us all look bad.  And by us, I don’t mean film critics, but rather any responsible film-watcher/eater of food.  Each week I shake and bake my favorite bad movies for your reading displeasure.  These movies are very un-bueno but have a certain indefinable quality that makes them impossible not to love.  Actually, if that quality still comes across as undefinable after you read the piece, I really haven’t done my job have I?  To add extra awesome sauce to your Friday, each week I pair the film with an appropriate snack food that promises to ruin your beach season.  This week we take flight with none other than Con Air.

A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to participate in The Sorcerer’s Apprentice press junket in Los Angeles. The film follows Balthazar Blake (Nicolas Cage), a master sorcerer in modern-day Manhattan trying to defend the city from his arch-nemesis, Maxim Horvath (Alfred Molina). Balthazar can’t do it alone, so he recruits Dave Stutler (Jay Baruchel), a seemingly average guy who demonstrates hidden potential, as his reluctant protégé. The sorcerer gives his unwilling accomplice a crash course in the art and science of magic, and together, these unlikely partners work to stop the forces of darkness. Participating in the junket were stars Nicolas Cage and Jay Baruchel along with producer Jerry Bruckheimer and director Jon Turtletaub. Below the jump are notes from the conference, straight from my trusty tape recorder to you.

With The Last Airbender and Twilight: Eclipse behind us, it’s becoming more and more easy to call this summer a relative bust. All that stands between Summer 2010 now and the bowels of history is Christopher Nolan’s Inception, or so you might think. Over the past few weeks I’ve become increasingly interested in the Jerry Bruckheimer produced magic-a-thon The Sorcerer’s Apprentice. And it has nothing to do with Nicolas Cage’s funky hair-do.