Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema: where the tricks and the treats are indistinguishable. This is the internet’s spookiest of bad movie columns dedicated to digging up the corpses of long-dead schlock. I’m tempted to do a Vincent Price laugh, but that doesn’t come through in text too well. Every week I slash a bad movie down to size and then, through a seance of praise, invite its spirit into my own heart. The result is truly terrifying. I will then pair the film with a supernaturally tasty junkfood item to haunt your waistline as the movie haunts your brain! So, as it turns out, horror sequels win the month of October here at JFC. And being that we are just two days removed from my favorite holiday, I thought it best to wrap up the year’s creepiest month with another film in the Halloween franchise. Today’s film is Halloween H20.

If there is one roving menace that still haunts the world in which we live, it is the threat of possible attack from Michael Myers. And now that it seems he can attack at any time of year, it’s even more important for us to stay vigilant.