With what is being called a massive failure at the box office, pulling in just $25 million domestic dollars (or 12% of its budget), Peter Berg‘s Battleship is sinking, but not before firing a warning shot across the bow of stupid ideas. And by a “warning shot across the bow” I mean a giant, moronic cruise missile. Battleship wasn’t destined for failure – after all, almost any idea can be made good. If you ignored the title, the idea of a few naval vessels fighting off aliens sounds pretty cool and not altogether stupid. However, you slap the Hasbro logo in-front of the credits and include a sequence where a missile destroyer blindly fires into the ocean while a captain shouts out “J-11″ and the stupidity quotient rises exponentially.

What is Movie News After Dark? It’s preparing for it’s Thanksgiving day off. Lots of movies in its future. So it’s going to make this quick. But don’t worry baby, it isn’t about how long it lasts. It’s about the motion of the ocean. We begin tonight with something very near and dear to my heart: shows that I like. Sure, it’s about television and not movies, but this column, while accused of being many things, has never been accursed of being consistent. Anyway, Vulture is reporting that Hell on Wheels has seen a ratings dip. We need to curb this, people. It’s a damn good show. So watch it and ensure that it doesn’t get cancelled. Seriously. Common is on that show.

PG-13 gets a lot of flack from us mature audiences sometimes – and with good reason. Often we complain that movies that deserve an R (Live Free or Die Hard) get knocked down to a PG-13 rating and lose the edge that can make them great. Todd Brown over at TwitchFilm recently made the point that PG-13 killed the movies it was meant to save – that is, youth adventure films. While I’m all for any chance to poke PG-13 into the eye any chance I get (and jam a thumb into the MPAA some place where they’d rate it R for violence), I don’t really follow that PG-13 killed youth adventure movies. But don’t worry. It’s still a bit of bullshit for other reasons.

The internet may collapse under the sheer weight of my rage, thanks to the major internet provider who continues to give me crap service and charge me handsomely for it each and every month, but that won’t stop us from doing the news this evening. Not when Stephen Sommers, Johnny Knoxville, Edgar Wright and Chinese Bigfoot are all making headlines on the same day! Lets get right to it, dear readers. You know you want to…

I was turned on to the folks over at TeeFury a few weeks ago, and I have visited their site every day since. Basically they have a community of graphic artists who design a t-shirt a day, and release them for a limited time. Seriously, their tees are only available for 24 hours, and then they are gone forever.

Paul Wernick and Rhett Reese. Two writers whose names you’ve probably heard around here a few times. Well, here they are again with yet another project.

I wasn’t quite sure at first how to tackle a list of the Best DVDs of the Year… by definition, aren’t the best dvds the ones containing the best movies? (Yes, they are.) We don’t want this to be a list of the year’s best movies though, so instead we’re looking at the best collections, box sets, and special editions. Obviously the quality of the movies or shows within still matter, but they’re just one aspect of a truly great dvd release. The other two most important things in a quality dvd are the extras and the packaging. The best dvds of the year should ideally have all three traits… awesome feature, awesome extras, awesome packaging. (At the very least they should have two out of three.) So here we go. These are the Best DVDs of 2009! AK100 (Criterion) This may be considered cinematic heresy but I’ve only seen three of Akira Kurosawa’s many movies. Forgive me. Happily the fine folks at Criterion have long been supporters of the director, and this year they released the most comprehensive dvd set ever seen for any director. AK100 celebrates what would have been Kurosawa’s 100th birthday and includes 25 of his movies from a career that lasted half a century. It includes the ones I’ve seen (Seven Samurai, Rashomon, and Yojimbo) and several others including a few that have never even had an official dvd release. The films each come in their own case, and the set also comes with a

Hasbro had a mega-hit with Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, and the studio hoped for lightning in a bottle with their August release of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. It made some green, but you might need to have a few drinks to really enjoy the film again on Blu-ray or DVD.

Steve Carell goes golfing, The Slammin’ Salmon heads to theaters, and Lars von Trier is really depressing. So what else is new?

We continue our support of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra by bringing you an inside look at the film’s girl-on-girl action. Yeah, we thought you’d enjoy that…

If you are going to the movies this weekend, there will be less lineups to navigate and more of a chance you’ll get a good seat, far away from other noisy and annoying theater patrons. And maybe you’ll be able to watch Gamer, All About Steve and Extract in relative peace.

Americans + sitting on asses + it’s hot outside + reasonably kickass movies = CA$H. Now that’s an equation that balances, to the tune of $4.17 billion fucking dollars. Come inside, check out the winners/losers recap, and cash some checks with this year’s top ten.

It turned out my premonition about who would finish first at the box office this weekend was pretty accurate, as The Final Destination took the top spot with a haul of $28 million.

Two absolutely frightening movies, both loaded with death, do battle in this weekend’s box office duel to the death: Halloween IIand The Final Destination. Oh, and for you Aquarius-type people there’s Taking Woodstock.

Despite having only three letters instead of four, “fun” is apparently a dirty word these days.

Not only did Inglourious Basterds win the weekend, but it scored a higher-than-expected $37.6 million! What’s more, this is the best opening for a Tarantino movie ever.

Welcome to what is sure to be a very Inglourious weekend at the movie theaters this weekend, as Quentin Tarantino’s much-anticipated Inglourious Basterds comes out seeking box office glory — or is it “gloury?”.

I really don’t have too much to say this week at the Reject Report, other than the fact that District 9 cleaned up, as predicted, at the box office, toppling G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra.

The big question this week concerns the box office fortunes of G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra… which might end up being referred to as the Fall of the Cobra by the end of the weekend.

Buried in the box office report from the LA Times comes the almost obvious news that Paramount Pictures is already moving forward with plans for a sequel to last weekend’s bread winner G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.