“You know, Mikey, one day you’re going to stick your dick in the wrong door, and somebody’s going to slam it,” and that line represents Man on a Ledge in a nutshell. Goofy and laughable, but overall kind of charming. Director Asger Leth, with the assistance of commercial honcho mega producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura, has made a through and through B movie. What you’d expect from a movie called Man on a Ledge, you get. It’s all fairly preposterous and thin, and Leth knows not to let it go on too long before its cheesy charms lose steam. The plot, well, you already know it. Anyone who’s seen that trailer has seen it all. For those of you who live under a rock though, Ledge follows Nick Cassidy, played compellingly enough by Sam Worthington and a dodgy accent. Cassidy wants to prove his innocence over a stolen diamond, so like any wise man, he escapes prison and goes to hang out on a ledge. But things aren’t what they seem, as is always the case. As he teases a suicide, his brother Joe (Jamie Bell) and his eye-candy girlfriend, played by the suavely named Genesis Rodriguez, go about robbing the man who may have framed Nick, the snarling David Englander (Ed Harris).

When HBO wanted to create an adaptation of the best-selling book “Game Change,” about the 2008 presidential race between John McCain and Barack Obama, they picked up the phone and called Jay Roach – the director behind Austin Powers and The Fockers who also delivered them the television movie Recount. Now, Roach has covered, semi-fictionally, politics in 2000 and in 2008. Slog through the dialogue between Woody Harrelson as Steve Schmidt (the Republican strategist) and Ed Harris as McCain, and you’ll be rewarded briefly with who will inevitably be the real star of the show, Julianne Moore slingin’ a down home twang as Sarah Palin. The question is this: with so much going on socially and economically, are we really interested in going back in time to examine a reality television star?

Welcome back to Junkfood Cinema: we have come here to chew bubblegum and worship bad movies…and we’re all out of bubblegum. Pursuant to our mission statement, hastily written in soy sauce on the wrapper of a Zagnut bar, every week we will tempt your cerebral taste buds with all the most decadent, delicious treats it doesn’t want to admit it craves. We will slice, dice, chop, and screw the movie; basting it in its own faults along the way. But then it will lovingly bake in our hearts at 98.6° for 3-5 paragraphs until it becomes golden brown with our misguided affection. We will then transform metaphor into substance by offering an actual snack food item paired with the film in order that no part of your insides remain unaffected by this odious column. If losers are always whining about their best, we achieve the complete opposite effect by lauding the worst with a barbaric yawp. Today’s Blue Plate Special: The Rock

WWE Studios has been producing a steady stream of big, dumb action schlock since ’02, their only real winner being Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s starring vehicle, The Rundown. To be fair, they co-produced to Universal’s Strike Entertainment; I imagine someone had the good sense to lock Vince McMahon in a closet during the lion’s share of that film. The wrestling organization’s studio wing has in recent years been playing it up to the PG-13 crowd to cast a wider demographic net, and thus their film library has seen some variation from wooden wrestlers blowing shit up and punching faces. Basically, WWE Studios wants you to know they have a heart– and so we get That’s What I Am, television writer/director Michael Pavone’s big screen feature debut.

To step out of one’s comfort zone can be a wonderful thing, or a gesture fraught with peril. For evidence of the dangers, look no further than the desperate Salvation Boulevard. A comedy with a religious fundamentalist bent, from a director accustomed to serious fare and starring actors not generally known for their comic chops, the film tries so hard to reach heights of absurdist mania that it falls flat.

Back in 2006, book critic Barbara Scott claimed that “‘The Long Walk’ is so cinematic that you have to wonder why it has never been made into a movie.” That statement proved to be prescient because now that novel about a handful of prisoners crossing over the planet’s harshest terrain in order to see freedom has been turned into a film by the phenomenal Peter Weir. The director of masterful human stories like Master and Commander, Dead Poets Society, and Witness now has a trailer out there in the world for his latest – The Way Back. It looks treacherous and raw. It appears to be Man vs Nature in all its glory. See for yourself:

This week’s installment of Movies We Love is brought to you by Neil Miller’s love for Michael Bay, the number 9, and the word “badass.”

Robert Fure polished his tin star and took a ride through the Old West with Ed Harris’ “Appaloosa” and thought it swell. But it wasn’t perfect. Here’s what worked and what didn’t.

Saddle up and take an early look at Ed Harris and Viggo Mortensen’s classic western, Appaloosa.

Robert Fure can get mad over just about anything. This time, he’s had too much of a good thing and is concerned with a new Hollywood trend that leaves the traditional story arc behind in favor of more, more, more.

As if you thought you couldn’t get enough of a good ole’ Western shoot ‘em up, here comes Ed Harris with Viggo Mortensen at his side in Appaloosa.

This article has absolutely nothing to do with the real Thundercats movie currently set to see theater time in 2010. This is all about a faux production created in the minds of a few fans.

Part of what makes this movie work, as we saw in the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie, is that the entire cast and crew is back.

Gone Baby Gone’s surprise star talks about her experiences in anticipation of the film’s release on DVD.

I think we’ve finally sorted out who’s the actor and who’s the director in the Affleck family. Over the last few years, Ben Affleck has been one of the most criticized men in front of the camera in Hollywood. Behind the camera however, Gone Baby Gone is only a small hint of what the man is capable of.