This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr heads into the January movie season with a heavy heart. He checks out Gwyneth Paltrow’s latest award bait flick, Country Strong. Hint, hint… no one is taking the bait. Then he tries like hell to see Season of the Witch, but the lack of regional press screenings and midnight shows keep him and Nicolas Cage’s mullet sadly apart. What else would you expect from the industry coming back from winter break. After all, this is the time of year that the mega-hits Leprechaun, BloodRayne and Bride Wars came out.

Here’s a basic lesson in Hollywood business: If a film is the sole wide theatrical release opening on the first weekend of a new year, it’s probably bad. More often than not, were the movie at least somewhere between passable and worth watching its releasing studio would find some way to get it to its audience during the prime holiday season. We’re still waiting for the exception to the rule and Season of the Witch is not it.

This week’s drinking game teaches us to lie with The Invention of Lying and how to murder people in a show storm with Whiteout… or it’ll just get you drunk.

I don’t know quite what to make of the first teaser for Season of the Witch. Watch it and then we’ll talk…

‘Whiteout’ is a dull thriller that never makes proper use of its Antarctic setting or Kate Beckinsale, its star.

Kevin Carr takes a look at this week’s movie releases, including 9, Sorority Row, Whiteout and Tyler Perry’s I Can Do Bad All By Myself..

Gremlins of all kinds invade the Magical Studio in the Sky. It’s either a sign of the apocalypse or a sign of bad movies in September. The first wave caused a glitch in Neil’s gender clarification surgery, so he had to return to the Netherlands to reclarify. Fortunately, David Medsker from Bullz-eye.com filled in.