What is Casting Couch? It’s a list of recent casting news. Recent as in, like, the last 24 hours recent. How’s that for service? Today we have news on what’s next for young actors like Craig Roberts and Chloe Moretz. If you were to make a list of dream directors who pretty much every young actor hopes they’re some day going to get to work with, Woody Allen would definitely be near the top of most of them. And if you made a list of all the young actresses who Woody Allen would like to have in his upcoming movies, chances are Emma Stone is somewhere near the top of that one. It’s probably time these crazy kids finally get together then, so Deadline is reporting that Stone is negotiating to star in Allen’s next movie, which is reportedly going to shoot in the south of France. Stone’s charisma and comic timing, Allen’s wit—it sounds like a match made in heaven, doesn’t it?

Great horned beasts loosing their urine on Adam Sandler‘s face, middle-aged male nudity, cheap jokes being ritualistically sacrificed. This is the trailer for Grown Ups 2. At least they got to use Warrant’s “Cherry Pie” in a not-at-all-cliche way. Check it out for yourself and get ready to eke out your best Colonel Kurtz impression:

Tonight in the wide world of entertainment news, we’ve gone down the rabbit hole of nerd pleasures. From a wedding officiated by Patrick Stewart to Hugh Jackman’s hands to Brad Bird inserting curse words into Star Wars to our undisputed queen of nerdom, Anna Kendrick, it’s all about the love in Movie News After Dark.

Editor’s note: With 2 Days in New York opening in limited release this Friday, here is a re-run of our review from Sundance, when it was the only film that could perk an exhausted Kate up on Festival Day 26. This review was originally posted on January 29, 2012. Picking up a few years where her 2 Days in Paris left off, Julie Delpy‘s 2 Days in New York has moved the sometimes-messy life of Marion (Delpy) to Gotham. Marion has now taken up with Mingus (Chris Rock, playing a pitch-perfect straight man), a former co-worker who offered dry humor and personal understanding when her previous relationship crumbled. The pair live together in a cozy and artistic apartment, joined by Marion’s young son Lulu (Owen Shipman) and Mingus’ daughter Willow (Talen Ruth Riley). As calm and lovely as their life together seems, everything is about to be tested over a brief two-day period, marked by the arrival of Marion’s insane family, the opening of an important gallery exhibition of Marion’s photos, and the unspoken pressure that one of Marion’s other artistic endeavors is putting her under.

While she’s best known as an actress (Before Sunrise, represent!), Julie Delpy has, in recent years, been making the transition to becoming a writer/director as well. Probably her best known work so far is her 2007 relationship comedy Two Days in Paris, which was kind of a comedy of manners where Delpy’s character and her boyfriend (Adam Goldberg) went to Paris to visit her crazy family and have some uncomfortable run-ins with her ex-boyfriends. 2 Days in New York seems to be a sequel in the classic sense. It tells basically the exact same story, except in reverse. This time the crazy family and the awkward ex-boyfriend are coming to New York to visit her and her new boyfriend (Chris Rock). It’s kind of like how Linda Kozlowski was first shocked by Crocodile Dundee’s Outback home and then Crocodile Dundee was shocked by her New York home. Kind of.

Quite a fuss has been made of Sunday night’s Golden Globes ceremony. Not the actual awards mind you – everything was safe and predictable in that arena. Not even the obvious drunkenness or awkward attempts at humor with varying degrees of success by the night’s celebrity award winners and presenters are the primary subject of the conversation (De Niro’s bizarre acceptance speech, Robert Downey Jr’s creepy framing of the Best Actress category). All discourse has been centered on the performance by the show’s host, Ricky Gervais. Gervais’s acerbic monologue was met with audible surprise and even aghast by his elite audience. His introductions to awards presenters ranged from tongue-in-cheek playfulness to blatant comic criticism. He later disappeared for more than an hour, prompting speculation on Twitter (the only place where aside observations can immediately morph into conspiracy theory) that he was taken off the show, only to emerge later, without his jacket and appearing vexed, to give quite the backhanded introduction to Tom Hanks and Tim Allen, which all-in-all does suggest at least a firm backstage talking-to. With strangely perfect timing, Gervais ended the show with the line, “And thank you to God for making me an atheist” before the generic end credits music surged. The Buñuelean echo of these final words was a rather appropriate summation of Gervais’s brilliant absurdity and anarchic irreverence peppered throughout this masturbatory rich-ual (get it?). It was, in short, hilarious and the best thing about the show. Here’s his monologue:

Coach Buzzer (Blake Clark), an influential Junior High Basketball coach, has died. His championship team of 1978 gets together for the first time in a long time to reconnect and celebrate the life of a great man at the same lake house where they celebrated victory 30 years before. Lenny Feder (Adam Sandler) is an important Hollywood agent whose wife Roxanne (Salma Hayek Pinault) is a clothing designer. Eric Lamonsoff (Kevin James) is a furniture store manager with a wife (Maria Bello) who still breast feeds their 4-year old son. Kurt McKenzie (Chris Rock) is a house husband who loves cooking shows and getting generally shit on by his wife Deanne (Maya Rudolph). Marcus Higgins (David Spade) is still single and still obsessed with sex. Rob Hilliard (Rob Schneider) is a new age mess who’s married to a woman twice his age named Gloria (Joyce Van Patten).

Kevin and Neil meet up again in the Magical Studio in the Sky to talk about their lackluster thoughts on this week’s new movies… and boobs. They also contemplate why movies aren’t making as much money this summer and what are the best sandwiches they have ever had.

I find myself shaking my head and wondering how the titans of my youth (and Kevin James) could end up here. I have to assume that, in some small or large degree, they’re asking themselves the same question. Sandler got his start making funny noises, Rock was a cultural icon with a lot of funny things to say about racial relations, Schneider annoyed everyone by the copy machine, and Spade annoyed everyone while they got off a plane, but all of these men created phrases that were repeated ad nauseam around the water cooler. Kevin James has always based his comedy around being large (like a non-threatening Chris Farley), so his trajectory to this point seems less confusing, but for the others, it’s almost like seeing the neutering of sharp comedic minds come to fruition. And they’re all doing it in one convenient movie.

This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr kicks ass with Kick-Ass and laughs it up at Death at a Funeral

Kevin and Neil invite you to experience a milestone in Fat Guy history… both Fat Guys have seen the new films this weekend, and they pretty much agree. Get your fire-and-bimstone umbrellas ready!

It’s a funny thing about remakes. For the most part, they are done for the wrong reasons and done with a lack of creativity. It’s something that concerns every movie fan when they hear the word. However, when you do it right, you deserve some praise. And this movie deserves some praise.

There’s something to be said about remakes, I know. And over the course of the nearly 4-year existence of Film School Rejects, we’ve said a lot about them. And with this one, there seems to be a lot to say…

As is the case with most stock studio comedies, it takes more than just big names to make a comedy worth watching. Except for the fact that your trailer should also be funny. Which this is not.

In November 2008, Devin Friedman wrote a GQ article about trying to make friends with black people. Did he succeed? We don’t know, we can’t read. But we also can’t wait for the movie.

Adam Sandler. Chris Rock. Kevin James. Rob Schneider. David Spade. After not making a movie for fourteen years, these comedy kings are back and joining forces for the first time.

Chris Rock is writing and starring in a remake of the 2007 British comedy, Death at a Funeral. A film that came out just last year, was directed by an American (Frank Oz), had pretty good exposure here in the US, and is already in English.

I can’t say that I was particularly excited for this one, and when I heard the “I like to move it” song…I thought I’d be in for the same movie. However, as the film pushed along, I ended up being pleasantly surprised.

Okay, we all know this is a kids’ movie, but who’s to say that you can’t enjoy a Madagascar movie if you’re a grown up? With that said, don’t go crazy with this game.

Kevin Carr looks at the slate of films in theaters this week with the FSR Report Card.