When we first see our frowzy anti-hero, he’s alone, smoking, pacing back and forth in the men’s room of an upscale New York restaurant, rehearsing…something.  “You’re amazing, a goddess, a gift from on high.” Is it a poem? A marriage proposal? Has he finally found a love so powerful and true that it’s remedied his hitherto cankered existence? No, of course not. Later, face-to-face with the delusional woman who somehow didn’t see this coming, he finishes the thought. “You deserve the white dress and the happy ending. I’m just not the guy to give it to you.”  Hank Moody is the same man he’s been since day one—insincere, kind of a jerk, closetful of black clothes. Season five of Californication picks up two years after the events of season four (hey, I guess the world doesn’t end in 2012). Karen (Natasha McElhone) is now married and apparently happy about it; Charlie (Evan Handler) and Marcy (Pamela Aldon) still aren’t together but have a two-year-old son (the kid hasn’t started talking yet which may or may not have something to do with the fact that both of his parents are apt to have sex in places where it’s quite easy to stumble upon them); Becca (Madeleine Martin) is in college, dating an arrogantly suave, younger version of her dad (who didn’t see that coming?); and Hank still hasn’t shaved.

Ah, the Golden Globes. The redheaded stepchild of award show season – a veritable island of misfit toys in terms of pop cultural offerings. Ridiculous as they oftentimes may be, the picks of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association are now among us, and up for the inevitable scrutiny of the Internet as a whole. Film nominations aside, the small screen selections for this year’s statuettes are as random as ever. With regular contenders ineligible for nomination (Mad Men), and former heavy-hitters now struggling to stay relevant (I’m looking at you, Desperate Housewives and Grey’s Anatomy), the pool of nominees is a hodgepodge one – often seeming as shallow as Paris Hilton. So just which shows should take home the statues when the Golden Globes are telecast January 15th? Here’s my breakdown of the nominees – from the way-to-go to the WTF.

Another week, another pretty solid group of DVD titles released for your viewing pleasure. Our wallets and bank accounts will be a lot happier this week too as compared to last Tuesday when the number of DVDs worth buying numbered eight. Eight! That’s more than most DVD columns feature in their entirety! But like I said, this week is filled with rentals (and one title worth buying) including Crazy Stupid Love, Cars 2, Bunraku, Trespass and more. As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it. The Adventures of Mark Twain (UK) “Naked people have little to no influence in this society.” So says the always wise and wonderful Mark Twain as captured in clay in this funny and whimsical claymation adventure. The film mixes bits and pieces of several of Twain’s works, short and long, into an adventure that sees Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn, and Becky Thatcher join Mr Samuel Clemens himself on a steam powered airship across the sky. Twain is hoping to find Halley’s Comet so he can end his life in its flames, but the children attempt to convince him that he still has much to offer mankind and that mankind has much to offer him. Fanciful visuals and eminently quotable observations from Twain’s writing make this a fun film that speaks to kids as well as adults. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

This week, on a very special episode of Reject Radio, we have 1st Lt. Travon Boykins – massive film geek and fightin’ force for the US Army – calling in live from the (un)active war zone of Iraq. Advisin’ and assistin’, baby. Shunning our usual format, we ramble on coherently for a while, give a one-sentence review of True Grit and figure out what Californication looks like without any sex. Listen Here: Download This Episode

Join us each week as Rob Hunter takes a look at new DVD releases and gives his highly unqualified opinion as to which titles are worth BUYing, which are better off as RENTals, and which should be AVOIDed at all costs. And remember, these listings and category placements are meant as informational conversation starters only. But you can still tell Hunter how wrong he is in the comment section below. This week once again sees a healthy number of releases worth buying and renting and only a few that should be avoided like a leprous Jehovah’s Witness. The much talked about but little seen Scott Pilgrim vs the World hits shelves today alongside Criterion’s release of Antichrist, Grown Ups, Ticked Off Trannies With Knives, and a few TV shows including the first season of the BBC’s excellent Sherlock.

Showtime Networks has a big presence in San Diego this year, from gigantic banners to multiple panels to a button campaign and several buses toting fellow nerds around the city. The crux of their advertising campaign this year revolvers around the idea that Showtime’s ‘heroes’ have more fun. Specifically we’re talking about Weeds, Californication, Dexter, and Nurse Jackie, shows that prominently feature some rather messed up main characters who are dysfunctional on some level. While each of these shows was represented on a panel (Dexter was on two), most of the information that was revolved focused on Hank Moody’s furthered adventures and the future of Dexter Morgan, so that’s what we’ll be talking about here. Plus those two shows are super awesome.

In a three-way, melee attack of awesome that will leave you wondering how we removed your heart from your chest without breaking the skin, FSR is gearing up to head to sunny San Diego in order to stay indoors all weekend. Interviewer extraordinaire Jack Giroux, Robert “Fists of” Fure and I will be sharing the experience with you from Wednesday night through a hungover Sunday morning. Pack your bags, dear reader, because you’ll be coming along for the ride. Just don’t believe Fure when he tells you he’s a commercial airline pilot.

In the third episode of the third season, Hank attempts to juggle three women sexually and at least two emotionally. This will always end well.

Hank Moody is back as the rock star author turned professor in Season 3 of the Showtime hit Californication.

Rob Hunter loves movies. He also loves working as the owner of a Hank Moody’s neighborhood liquor store. These two joys come together in the form of cash money payments that he receives every week and immediately uses to buy more DVDs. This week we have Adventureland, Californication, The Informers, and more!

Fans of ABC’s “Castle” and Showtime’s “Californication” are in for a treat as their previously fake books have suddenly become very real.

Foreign Objects travels the world of international cinema each week to look for films worth visiting. So renew your passport, get your shots, and brush up on the local age of legal consent, this week we’re heading to… the UK!

Hank completes his biography of Lew Ashby. Mia departs LA for her cross-country book tour. Sonja gives birth to a baby who is decidedly not Hank’s. Fortunately, Julian steps up to the plate.

The Hollywood Foreign Press Association announced their nominees for the 66th Annual Golden Globe Awards today, laying out what is generally regarded as a relatively accurate precursor to the Academy Awards nominations.

To celebrate the release of Mia’s book, Ashby hosts a soiree at the manor. At the party, Karen reveals to Hank that she hasn’t read Mia’s book.

For the second time this season, Hank finds himself in a chair, legs open wide, and another man playing with his balls.

Hank meets Janie Jones for a date at a Venice art gallery, where they bump into a very pregnant Sonja and Julian.

Actor/Screenwriter Seth Rogen may have found his calling in the world of porn — and who can blame him.

Hank spends the day at the home of Janie Jones trying to get the back story on her relationship with Lew Ashby. When Janie’s husband comes home early, Hank is forced to bide his time in the pool house with the Jones family maid, Rosario.

Hank and Karen attend a parent-teacher conference at Becca’s high school. Hank hits it off with the English teacher, Mrs. Patterson, only to discover that this latest possible conquest is also the mother of Becca’s boyfriend Damien.