What is Movie News After Dark? It’s a nightly movie news column that often sits around in its best lingerie a little too much. Like Emma Frost in the new X-Men film, it loves walking around in its skivvies. However, unlike Ms. Frost and her lovely attire, it does not receive a positive response. It’s okay, because this movie news column is not a real thing. It’s just an object. We begin tonight with a scantly glad, hollow-gazing January Jones lounging around in Matthew Vaughn’s uber-stylish X-Men: First Class. What I find interesting about Jones is that whether she’s about to turn into a woman with diamond-coated skin or she’s waiting for Don Draper to come home from a night of whoring around, it’s the same facial expression. That’s consistency.

This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr follows Jamie Chung to Thailand, hoping to get married. Unfortunately, someone slips him roofies, which made him black out and spend a drunken night in Bangkok. Once he got out of that city, he headed over to China to become the new pot-bellied dragon warrior. After all, if a cartoon panda can do it, why can’t he? That didn’t stop him from spending another night in the hospital, and maybe a little time in a Bangkok jail. And then the real horror happened… Kevin saw The Tree of Life.

What do you do when you’ve made the highest-grossing R-rated comedy ever? Well, you make a sequel and hope you strike gold one more time. And thus we have The Hangover Part II. Todd Phillips reunites the Wolfpack once again for yet another pre-wedding day disaster, this time set in the seedy underbelly of Bangkok. Stu (Ed Helms) prepares to marry anew, and much to the dismay of Phil (Bradley Cooper), intends to avoid any and all possibility of a repeat of his last bachelor party by, well, not having one. With a last minute, half-hearted wedding invite to Alan (Zach Galifianakis), the entire gang is on their way to Thailand. Following an uncomfortable dinner with the family of Stu’s soon-to-be wife Lauren (Jamie Chung) at the resort they are to wed, Stu is convinced to allow Lauren’s younger brother Teddy (Mason Lee) to accompany the boys to a simple beach bonfire with only a six pack to split between them. …and then The Hangover happens, or at least a pretty pale shadow of it.

What is Movie News After Dark? It is (d) all of the above. “La Luna is the timeless fable of a young boy who is coming of age in the most peculiar of circumstances.” That’s the opening of the synopsis to Pixar’s La Luna, the short that will play the Annecy International Animation Festival next month in France. It’s our adorable headlining image. (Courtesy of Walt Disney Pictures)

Dax Shepard doesn’t know martial arts, but he wants to leave comedy behind in order to reinvent himself as an action star. How? By starring, writing, producing, and executive producing Brother’s Justice. This trailer proves that Joaquin Phoenix shouldn’t have tried to trick anyone with a fake documentary, because this honest look at Shepard attempting to get his fake movie made, getting in fights with Brazilian Jujitsu practitioner Bradley Cooper, and trying to get James Cameron on board looks far more entertaining (even if it might be less thought-provoking). If anything, it’s finally gotten Ashton Kutcher and Tom Arnold into the same flick. Check out the trailer for yourself:

If you tilt your head, squint your eyes, and stand on one foot, Bradley Cooper still doesn’t look like he’d make a good goth. He looks like the guy that beat up the goths in high school before throwing the winning touchdown and heading home to bed down the prom queen. So what’s his name doing anywhere near a remake of The Crow? It’s unclear, but it’s there. According to The Hollywood Reporter, Cooper is in negotiations to star in the film now being directed by Juan Carlos Fresnadillo. What does that mean? That the deal isn’t finalized, but that a deal very much exists. There is an odds on chance that Cooper will be The Crow. There are a lot of obvious negatives here, but there is at least one positive. This gives Cooper a chance to prove everyone wrong. The gut reaction is that he’s completely bad casting, that he’s a ray of sunshine where a blot of darkness needs to be, but wherever there’s doubt, there’s opportunity. If he can seize that opportunity and deliver a killer performance, then he can cement a great film and show that he’s got more range than people give him credit for. Whether he will end up getting the job or being up to it has yet to be seen. Fortunately, if it happens, it might mean despair for fans of The Crow, and they all love that sort of thing. It’ll be another excuse for us to jam some Morrisey [Due to Content Scraping and Theft, we have been forced to try abbreviated feeds. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and woud very much appreciate you clicking through to view the full article on FilmSchoolRejects.com]

If it ain’t broke, take it to Thailand. The first full trailer for The Hangover Part II mimics the first one fairly closely. The guys have their celebration, they wake up, and the hits keep coming. Instead of Mike Tyson, it’s a bunch of ass-kicking monks. Instead of a tiger in the bathroom, it’s a monkey on your shoulder. Instead of a missing tooth, it’s Mike Tyson on your face. Check it out for yourself:

This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr starts a new regimen of drugs that comes in a clear little pill. The guy on the street corner told him that it would unlock the full potential of his mind, and he assured Kevin it was FDA approved. Why would this guy lie to him? While waiting for the drugs to kick in, Kevin decided to take a trip across the American southwest and search for skinny little aliens with fat man voices. He knows he’s safe, even if he’s picked up by the cops, because he’s retained a dead-sexy lawyer who runs his practice out of the back of his Lincoln Town Car.

The first trailer for the sequel to The Hangover has hit the web and it has absolutely everything that a teaser trailer for a sequel to a highly successful film should. First we get a bunch of reminders about how much everyone like the first film. Then we get assurances that the main characters we loved from the first film are all going to be back. Then we see a brief glimpse, though not too much is given away, that new hijinx will be had involving a monkey. And finally, the characters make meta, self-referential comments to each other about how weird it is that they’re all back together and having the same things happen to them. You see, you want to let a potential viewer know that there is going to be new stuff, but not too much new stuff. This will be very much in the same wheelhouse as the first film. There’s nothing that you aren’t comfortable with here. As a matter of fact, squint and you might think you’re watching the first film all over again. And didn’t we all have so much fun with that? So anyways, The Hangover Part II is on the way, and I hope it makes me laugh my ass off. I imagine it will. Get teased yourself after the jump.

ET recently sent their cameras over to Thailand to get some exclusive footage of the filming of The Hangover 2, as well as some exclusive comments from the cast. The footage is generally pretty useless other than a couple fun moments of Zach Galifianakis being Zach Galifianakis. He starts off the piece by being cordial enough and talking about what a good time he is having filming in Thailand. He told the crew, “I don’t really want to go back because I find that I might be bored when I go back to the United States. This is, like, the most un-boring place. I just love it.” The cringeworthy fun starts when Galafianakis starts to realize the interviewer doesn’t have any questions beyond: “Wasn’t the first movie great? Is the second movie going to be great too? Will it be just like the first?” It’s interesting to watch his reaction to being interviewed. All of the other guys are taking it in stride, answering the stupid questions like they’ve done a million times before; but Galifianakis is visibly uncomfortable. While Bradley Cooper assures audiences that everyone they liked from the first one will be back, Galafianakis chimes in with a not so helpful, “I don’t know if it’s on the Internet or not, the California Raisins are in this…” But the climax of the piece comes when the interviewer asks Ed Helms if he has gotten all of his dental problems sorted out since the first movie. Galifianakis pauses, lets [Due to Content Scraping and Theft, we have been forced to try abbreviated feeds. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause and woud very much appreciate you clicking through to view the full article on FilmSchoolRejects.com]

With any luck, the Holistic Healing League (which I just made up) will be boycotting Limitless in no time. The idea is shockingly simple – a man starts taking a pill that opens up the rest of his mental faculties to his use. He’s a medicated genius, and he uses that genius for personal gain. Then, Robert De Niro gets pissed about it. The lesson here is that as long as drugs are FDA-approved, they’re totally kosher to take (unless De Niro gets mad at you, then you should stop immediately). So remember, kids, don’t do drugs except the ones your government tells you are A-Okay. Limitless stars De Niro, Bradley Cooper, and Abbie Cornish. It was directed by The Illusionist director Neil Burger, and it will see theaters March 18, 2011. Check out the even higher res version of the trailer at Apple.

Were you alive in the mid-1980s? If so, and you weren’t in diapers still, you had a chance to watch one of the greatest television shows of that era: The A-Team. It was a bizarre mix of comedy, action and family-friendly violence. And it was the coolest thing for kids to watch on Tuesday nights. The new movie may not have been an huge hit over the summer, but it was hella fun for A-Team fans, and now that it’s on DVD and Blu-ray, it’s a chance to enjoy real fake bad guys getting really fake killed in the privacy of your own home.

If you or someone you know works in child services, then you already know how hellish it can be. It’s emotionally draining, mentally challenging, and the people that do the work are often balancing a dozen eggs on a spoon while traveling across a high wire with no net. Only, those eggs have to grow up; you can’t just recall them. And that’s without having to deal with a potentially supernatural killer with shark’s eyes and barbie dolls. Case 39 stars Renee Zellweger as a case worker who saves a little girl from what looks like an abusive mother and father, but soon they’re love of locking her out of their bedroom at night and threatening to send her to hell seem pretty level-headed. The trailer just hit online, and it’s got just a touch of The Ring to go with its unnerving goodness. Stop when you feel resistance:

While they may not have dominated the box office with their crazy tactics and awesome weapons, the A-Team did entertain. You know the deal.

What is The A-Team? It’s a big budget revamp of an eighties TV show! It’s a typical summer action movie with more boom than brains! It’s a rare example of Hollywood showing the US military in a positive light in an effort to finally make Aleric happy!

This week, Fat Guy Kevin Carr hops in a time machine to 1984 to grade The A-Team and The Karate Kid.

Kevin and Neil hop in a time machine and travel back to 1984 to relive the glory days of The A-Team and The Karate Kid. Then they lay down a Fat Guy Five about 80s TV shows that should get their own movie before learning the true meaning of Mr. Belvedere.

If you haven’t met The A-Team, you’re probably in the lost generation. Those born in the chasm between the run of the 1983 television series and right now. Don’t worry though, we’ve got some helpful videos for you.

Rob Hunter takes a look at the new trailer for A-Team and focuses a bit too much on Jessica Biel.

After the success of both Wedding Crashers and The Hangover, Bradley Cooper seemed ready to jump all over the wave of good fortune and get to work on becoming a genuine movie star. And since, he’s made a series of good choices.Today we learned of another good choice made by the young actor: to stay far away from Terminator Salvation director McG.