Any movie that involves a trip to the Playboy Mansion and a cast of relatively hot, somewhat nubile actresses is going to attract some attention from the fellas, including my very manly self. Alright, that last part might be a lie, but it is true that any man with a working pituitary gland is bound to be at least intrigued by any movie that includes Anna Faris in a skimpy outfit, right?
That said, I went into my first viewing of The House Bunny last night with cautious optimism — yes, it is a movie about a Playboy Bunny who is forced to assimilate herself into a college sorority after being booted by Hef, but it is also a PG-13 movie. That means no nudity. But after seeing it once, and enjoying it for myself, I have made some observations. That is, part of me has made observations — you know, the really manly part.
Anyway, here we go:
6. Hugh Hefner is a Terrible Actor, But He’s Still My Hero
There is one moment in the movie when Hef was probably instructed to “act surprised” during a phone conversation with Shelley, played by Anna Faris. The result is one of the most awkward deliveries of dialog since Morgan Freeman tried to drop the word “motherf%$ker” at the end of Wanted. It was almost off-putting, then I remembered that this is Hugh Hefner we are talking about — the man can be a terrible actor. No matter what, he is still a hero to men everywhere.
5. Rumer Willis is Not As Ugly As You Might Have Thought
For a moment during the film, and we are talking about maybe 35 seconds of celluloid here, Rumer Willis appeared to be really hot. She starts out in a back-brace, and as these stories always go, she breaks free from the tyranny of her medical issues to become a babe. It doesn’t last long, as you might quickly recall that she looks more like Bruce Willis than Demi Moore, but for a moment Rumer makes it happen on-screen.
4. Beverly D’Angelo is Still the Quintessential Cougar
I’ve got to hand it to Bev, she’s still a foxy lady, no matter how old she is. She is just as hot now as she was back when she was strutting her stuff alongside Wayne Newton in National Lampoon’s Vegas Vacation. And in The House Bunny, she may play the evil rival housemother from the snooty sorority down the street, but that’s the way I like her — when she’s being really bad.
3. Katherine McPhee is Slightly Less Hot When Pregnant, But Only Slightly
When you cast the likes of Kat Dennings (Charlie Bartlett), Emma Stone (Superbad) and Katherine McPhee as girls in the ugly duckling sorority, you have to go through a strenuous process of uglying them up before they can be transformed by their new nude-posing housemother. The solution for McPhee? Make her the pregnant one. This might work, if her hotness wasn’t impervious to pregnancy. Like Jessica Alba, there is nothing about pregnancy, or even fake pregnancy for that matter, that doesn’t have me interested in being Katherine’s baby daddy.
2. Having a Crush on the Geeky Emma Stone is Okay
As you may remember, Emma Stone is the deep-voiced hottie with a uniquely nerdy quality who got head butted by Jonah Hill in Superbad. In this film, she plays the extremely geeky, socially awkward head of household who is responsible for recruiting Shelley (Faris) as the sorority’s house mother. Of course, by the end she is back to being just plain hot, but don’t be surprised if you are drawn to the more nerdy version of her character at the beginning of the film. Geeks are hot, people. Get with the times.
1. Anna Faris is Absolutely Fucking Hysterical
This last one probably has less to do with Anna Faris being hot in a very “cute as a button” sort of way, but who cares — she is the reason that this movie doesn’t fall flat on its cotton tail. Faris’s ability to play the air-headed Shelley to perfection had me giggling through the whole experience. From silly physical antics to that spaced look that she delivers perfectly with every dumb bit of dialog, she makes it work. She had me at “Oooh la la. That’s French, right?”
The House Bunny hits theaters everywhere this Friday.