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Date Movie of the Week: How Pirates can spice up your love life…

Posted by Neil Miller (neil@filmschoolrejects.com) on July 5, 2006

Date Movie of the WeekIt is always a daunting task, is it not? Picking out a movie to see with your sweetheart. As I discussed a few weeks ago, there are some theatrical releases that will get you put in the doghouse (I would reference any of the three Terminator flicks) and there are some that will get you a little more intimate approval. And that is what we are really looking for right? Aside from love, trust, and companionship, we are ultimately all in it for the means of getting close (no matter what level of closeness you seek.) So it is safe to say that there are some films that will rev her engines a little more than others. Most of these gems will include a particular male celebrity on a very long list. Here are a few very good examples that are sure to get any woman all warm inside:

  • Brad Pitt
  • Clive Owen
  • Jude Law
  • Johnny Depp

These are only a few examples of actors who your female companion would leave you for in a second. Tom Cruise used to be on this list, that is until he went psycho and stole Katie Holmes from the world with the sole intention of creating little Scientologist spawn. It is sad, really (I’m referring to the Katie Holmes part; I always knew that Cruise was a loon.) So thankfully there are no Tom Cruise movies being released this weekend. But there is one particular release for which you will score some points…


Knightley and Depp in Dead Man's ChestI am talking about Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest, which stars the very funny, talented, and did I mention “girlfriend melting” Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow. What woman can resist the charm and looks of Johnny Depp? Don’t know? If you were one of those guys who were dragged along to see Chocolat or — let’s say — the first Pirates movie, then obviously your woman is incapable of resisting Mr. Depp. Get the point? He is a guy whom we can all respect; good looks, good humor, gets to share the screen with Keira Knightley…

Ah yes, the reason you will be able to sit through this film: Keira Knightley. Maybe it is just me, but that accent is hot. I know that you didn’t see Pride & Prejudice for fear of being called out as a watered down version of a man, but the fact that she was in it made you consider it. On top of Ms. Knightley (giggles…) is the fact that this one looks like it will have plenty of action and a decent amount of comedy. You can admit to yourself that you enjoyed the first one, and know that this one should only be an improvement. Not only is this Pirate movie a safe bet by guy standards, it may just be one of the best movies of the summer. See… you can kill two birds with one stone. Now isn’t that great!

Also, keep an eye on my Review List, as I will have a review for Dead Man’s Chest up sometime Friday morning.

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3 Comments

The big O says:

“Here are a few very good examples that are sure to get any woman all warm inside:

Brad Pitt
Clive Owen
Jude Law
Johnny Depp”

Um, are you under the impression that there are only white women in the world??? Because in this sentence you said ANY woman, but I think you meant any WHITE woman. Try to think about such statments before you make them in the future.


Neil says:

Black women aren’t attracted to Brad Pitt?

I must be out of touch…


Biggie says:

None that I know. Sisters, cousins, aunts……. umm nope.


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