
Officially Cool: An Honest Look At Juno
Officially Cool By Brian C. Gibson on April 22, 2008 | (26) Comments
If there is anything to learn from last year’s little film that could, not everyone loves the underdog and maybe that is why it is the underdog. Rod Hilton, creator of TheEditingRoom.com, wrote his own version of a Juno screenplay that advertises to be “10 times shorter, and 100 times more honest.”
Personally, my favorite “scenes from this screenplay would be these two:
ELLEN PAGE
That’s right! I found it in the fridge, behind the purple stuff! Now relinquish the bathroom key geeves, I for shizz need to spout.
RAINN WILSON
I can barely understand you. Is there a reason you’re talking like what seems like a teenager designed by a committee of adults that have researched youth by watching MTV around the clock?
ELLEN PAGE
Yes, and you better start talking like that too or you’ll have no place in the movie, Dwight.
RAINN WILSON
Oh, er, uh, I mean that’s one doodle that can’t be undid homeskillet oh my god I need a new agent.
ELLEN PAGE
You’re so quirky! And so am I!
ELLEN sits down to talk to her father and stepmother.
ELLEN PAGE
So, I’m pregnant.
J.K. SIMMONS
WHAT YOU’RE FUCKING 16 WHAT THE FU-
ELLEN PAGE
Dad, you’re in an indie flick, remember?
J.K. SIMMONS
Oh right. Sorry, I didn’t mean to blow up, I meant to make a dry, sarcastic remark.
ALLISON JANNEY
And I’d like to follow that up with a second barb.
ELLEN PAGE
It’s Michael Cera’s. The kid from Arrested Development.
J.K. SIMMONS
Huh. I didn’t think he had it in him.
ELLEN PAGE
What, sperm?
If you would like to read the rest, just follow the link at the bottom. Let me know what you think of this, because I loved to see someone poking hard at m.
Source: Cracked.com
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