WTF: Charlize Theron is the Sexiest Woman Alive?

Posted by Kevin Carr (kevin@filmschoolrejects.com) on October 10, 2007

post-charlizeesquire.jpgToday, the news hit Yahoo that Charlize Theron has been named the Sexiest Woman Alive by Esquire magazine. She will be featured in the upcoming issue, which hits the street on Tuesday, October 16.

But as film geeks and horny teenage boys wait for the sexy spread to come out on newsstands, it’s left a lot of us thinking, “What the fuck?”

Don’t get me wrong. Charlize Theron is a sexy lady. So are other past winners Jessica Biel, Angelina Jolie and Scarlett Johansson. But the sexiest women alive? Hardly. (Well, maybe Jessica Biel.)

What about Megan Fox? What about Monica Bellucci? What about Jessica Freakin’ Alba?

I’m having flashbacks to the time Eva Longoria was voted Top Sexiest Female TV Star Of All-Time by a British supermarket.

Speaking as someone who routinely writes top ten lists that are incessantly flamed by aforementioned film geeks and horny teenage boys, I find this title utterly dishonest. The fact that Theron won an Oscar for making herself look ugly in “Monster” and has tried, and failed, twice since for her roles in “North Country” and “In the Valley of Elah,” a more appropriate title for Esquire magazine would be “Charlize Is the Sexiest Woman Who We Could Negotiate a Photo Spread With.”

[Editor's Note: Below you will find 4 images from Esquire's photoshoot with Charlize. These at least make this topic "debatable". Stay tuned to Fat Guys at the Movies for more.]

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  • “Charlize Is the Sexiest Woman Who We Could Negotiate a Photo Spread With.”

    If that isn't the funniest thing I've seen all day since last looking in the mirror, I don't know what is. ROTFLMHO!
  • Ok, ok... Sexiest Woman on the Planet? Maybe Not.

    But she is pretty damn sexy. Just look at those photos. It will be difficult to keep her off of our Top 10 list this week. But then again, that is another battle that will be raged at a later time and date. (Hint: This weekend on Fat Guys at the Movies. Check it out.)
  • Jorge Sosa
    Here's the thing. Charlize is damned hot, but she's also chosen some excellent roles. This suggests she's smart and has some artistic integrity. Combine all that and you've one got one sexy woman. There are plenty of Hollywood hotties, but brains and looks combined are what make one truly sexy, IMHO.
  • k-0s
    Aishwarya Rai...most of the world agrees with me too, hehe.
  • Mishele
    how about Charlize in "Two Days in the Valley" with James Spader as her crazy lover? Check out the white catsuit and the girlfight with Teri Hatcher! Sheesh! I like guys, but I'd go gay for her!
  • laretumulak
    She's really really sexy....
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