This Little Lohan Went to Rehab, This Little Lohan Saw Ghosts
Posted by Josh Radde (josh@filmschoolrejects.com) on April 23, 2008
Aliana Lohan will co-star in a film adaptation of R.L. Stine’s series Mostly Ghostly. AOL News reports that Lohan will play a “popular high school student” in the story that revolves mostly around an 11 year-old boy who had two ghosts residing in his bedroom.
The film has no distributor as of yet, but Li’l Lohan (the official FSR nickname for Ali) is no newcomer to the public eye—she is appearing in E! reality show “Living Lohan” with her mother this summer and released a collection of Christmas songs in 2006—and is mainly known for being the 14 year-old sister of druggy booze-hound Lindsay Lohan (I submit Big Lohan as an official FSR nickname as well). Lohan is apparently following in the footsteps oh Haylie Duff, sister of much more famous sibling Hillary, who also played a “popular high school student” in Napoleon Dynamite.*
Now, this is all well and good, I’m sure the movie will come and go without anyone really noticing. The shenanigans I call is on the industry for adapting the wrong R.L. Stine books! Yes, “Goosebumps” was made into a reasonably popular TV series in the mid-90s, but these adaptations never did the stories any justice. And by “justice” I mean they really sucked. I remember tiny Josh Radde getting home from school the day the series premiered. He sat down with a bowl of buttered popcorn his 12 year-old body could digest without heartburn and waited to see his favorite stories brought to screen. Young Josh Radde’s face began to sag with horror as the long dick of the “Goosebumps” series slapped across his face.
If R.L. Stine is, in fact, the “Stephen King of children’s literature” according to Wikipedia, how come his material has never been treated like it? I mean, Thinner was made into a movie! Wouldn’t it be great to see Night of the Living Dummy on a 40-foot screen? Say Cheese and Die? This writer thinks so.
* This was also the path taken by Casey Affleck, although he never played a “popular high school student” but rather “guy who jerks off into a baseball glove” in Good Will Hunting.
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