Movie News
Stop Dane Cook: A Campaign to Protect Our Children
Posted by Kevin Carr (kevin@filmschoolrejects.com) on October 21, 2007
There’s a threat facing America, and the world at large. It’s not as high profile as other issues. You don’t see it talked about on the news like you do the Iraq war. You don’t hear the President address it like he does global terrorism. You don’t hear the CDC put out any alerts about it.
But it’s out there, it’s a threat to the very fabric of our entertainment sensibilities and it is going unchecked, reaching epidemic levels.
The threat, my friends, is Dane Cook.
Not his stand-up, mind you. I have no beef with that. But as a Hollywood leading man, he must be stopped.
Hollywood has tapped Cook to be the new go-to guy for romantic roles. But after “Employee of the Month,†“Good Luck Chuck†and the upcoming “Dan in Real Life,†the atrocities of his acting is clear.
I have been asked whether Dane Cook is as deadly as AIDS, or as dangerous as breast cancer, or as emotionally crippling as autism. That I cannot answer. Let history be the judge.
But I will tell you this. Dane Cook is a threat to life as we know it. While this seems to be an exaggeration, it is not. I know I have fallen into despair and wanted to commit suicide after seeing some of his films. And the word from the Hollywood underbelly is that Owen Wilson may have been driven to suicide after learning that Dane Cook got the lead in “Good Luck Chuck,†which also gave him the chance to make out with Jessica Alba.
Is there no justice in the world? Not when Dane Cook continues to make movies.
Like the communist threat in the 1950s, Dane Cook’s acting endangers the hearts, minds and souls of our children. We can only hope that the Congress will soon launch an oversight committee on the dangers of him becoming a screen legend.
In the mean time, I have started an awareness ribbon campaign. People need to know how bad his movies are, and if you look at his box office receipts, it’s clear he’s not doing enough to make people aware of this. People should wear the special brown Stop Dane Cook ribbon at all social, media and public functions.
Here is what you can do to spread the word. Email StopDaneCook@filmschoolrejects.com with your mailing address to request your ribbon today. Film School Rejects will even pick up the $0.35 that it will cost to get this thing shipped to you!! How about that?!
Spread the word. Do your part. Stop Dane Cook.
Read more articles by Kevin Carr
146 Comments
October 21st, 2007 at 6:38 pm
his movies this year have grossed over 80 million and his concert tour has sold 200,000tix in 8 days …. i love him also … this is really insipid what u have written
October 21st, 2007 at 8:57 pm
haha, I don’t find him funny. I liked him the more serious role in Mr. Brooks, but otherwise i’m not sure of his appeal
October 21st, 2007 at 9:58 pm
[…] sourced here […]
October 21st, 2007 at 10:49 pm
$80 million?????
uh… Mr. Brooks grossed $28, and Good Luck Chuck has only grossed $34. According to my math, that’s $62 million for only two movies this year. Not exactly a Will Smith.
And I think the draw for Mr. Brooks was Kevin Costner with Jessica Alba being the draw for Good Luck Chuck.
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:39 am
Kevin–You’ve seen Cook’s performance in “Dan in Real Life”–I missed a preview of it on Saturday. He looked like he could’ve been decent in that one in a smaller role, because it’s Carell’s show. Is he really that bad?
There’s only one OCTOBER!
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:42 am
Yeah Josh. Cook was in Dan in Real Life. And as charming as Carell is, Dane Cook is that insincere and cheesy. Think of his entire performance like his flirting scenes in Good Luck Chuck. The guy’s a menace to society.
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:46 pm
I’ve been touting the adage “Dane Cook is comedy AIDS” for months now. Glad to see I’m not the only one to make the comparison.
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:56 pm
You’re retarded, just because you’re religious, doesn’t mean you should shield your childrens’ eyes and ears, you retard.
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:10 pm
Religion is probably the stupidest thing to base your opinions on. I am a Buddhist Jew, and frankly there are more horrible and important things going on than Dane Cook, they show terrorist murders on tv, and your afraid of a little bad comedy?! What the hell kind of father are you. If you want to help out, vote for someone that will stop the war, not stop foul humor… FREEDOM OF SPEECH U TARD!
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:17 pm
Who the hell brought up religion?
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:25 pm
“I am a Buddhist Jew, and frankly there are more horrible and important things going on than Dane Cook, they show terrorist murders on tv,”
Insert shot of Phil Hartman as Frank Sinatra playing a mock violin here.
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:31 pm
Wait, you DON’T have a problem with his stand-up? But…but…it isn’t funny!
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:37 pm
Hmmmmm… I haven’t even begun to contemplate the religious significance of Dane Cook.
If you add the numbers of his first name DANE (4+1+14+5), you get 24, which is equivalent to four 6’s. He’s got one more 6 than the Antichrist.
Coincidence???
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:45 pm
dude your EXPLETIVE DELETED retarted, just because you cant be as funny or as talented as him your whining and bitching about his fame. he entertains the people of this country and others for the joy that it gives him, not the money, its not his fault everyone loves him, shit just happens, but please let the man be and quit your bitching…..
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:48 pm
I guess the irony of your post, Chris, would be that you actually mispelled the word ‘retarded’… to be ‘retarted’ as you put it, would, if at all possible, mean to re-made in a tasty pastry…
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:01 pm
I appreciate Dane Cook. No really! See, when a movie of his comes out or he’s in a stadium infecting his fans, there are thousands upon thousands of dull, obnoxious fools that I know I will be nowhere close to. When the next Dane Cook stankball hits the cineplex, the air outside will be fresher, the IQs, higher. Thanks for keeping your slow fans away from me, Dane.
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:05 pm
Dane Cook is a waste of space. His acting is at best lame, and his stand up (the parts that he didn’t rip off) is so mindless its sad that theres actually sheep out there that find him funny.
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:19 pm
The religious significance of Dane Cook’s existence is that there is no god…
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:26 pm
Well - not to mention his role in Waiting in which he plays the exact same role he always does. As an actor he has NO depth of character and is only capable of playing ….. well….. Dane Cook. As a comic he is fantastic (if you enjoy people who say the punch line 3 times in 3 different ways at 3 different speed to ensure you get the joke) but Hollywood needs to stop thinking you they can put a guy who is popular with the 13 to 25 year old market in a movie and think it is going to be movie gold.
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:42 pm
Isn’t Dane Cook hated in the Comedy Community also. I hear he’s a hack along with Carlos Mencia. But, I do have to say that is one lucky bastard to have landed such big blockbusters. I do totally agree with you though, Dane Cook is a bane to our society.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:02 am
You left out his best (worst) role ever
Simon Sez
He’s Dennis Rodman’s sidekick…need i say more?
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:06 am
how is he corrupting children as you so put it? i find him funny and, while it is obnoxious, his sense of humor is the same as any teenager in america. I’m just saying, this gives no examples of what exactly he is doing.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:24 am
How dare you start this pathetic Campaign. For one, hes a comedian if you dont like what he says then dont WATCH. If you fear for your children then maybe you should take a look at yourself. I dont agree that kids should watch him. IF THEY ARE THEN THATS THE PARENTS FAULT. STOP blaming him for something you can control by simpling changing the channel.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:34 am
This is probably one of the stupidest articles I have read in a long time.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:36 am
For one, the only people mostly I see bashing him are men. Don’t be jealous ’cause hes scored roles with hot chicks. Hes a decent actor (nothing award winning) and an awesome stand up comedian. Stop being jealous.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:48 am
Shauna said it: “Hes a decent actor (nothing award winning) and an awesome stand up comedian. Stop being jealous.”
I’m a somewhat harsh critic and I like Dane’s spontaneity and exuberance. I don’t see him up on the Oscars stage anytime soon (or ever), but really- this article is pretty much retarded. Get a life. Dane is fun to watch.
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:51 am
“… this article is pretty much retarded. Get a life.”
Yeah, seriously Kevin. How dare you have an opinion and try and bring your minions of hate-mongering ribbon wear-ers here to Film School Rejects. This is a site that has always upheld the highest standards of journalistic integrity and mass appeal. What’s wrong with you, man?
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:06 am
OR you could mind your own damn business and just not go to his movies instead of being a stuck up whore about it..?
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:07 am
Not to mention you don’t have a single argument in here other than “he’s bad.” When you blog, do a little less of the whiny bitch thing and a little more of the persuasion thing.
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:07 am
I like Dane Cook. I cracked up for a solid hour when I heard one of his albums on a long car ride about a year ago. People who write articles like these have every right to do so, but if you like Dane Cook prior to reading this and then reading this makes you all of a sudden NOT like his work, then you are an idiot. You can’t go around forming your opinions on someone based on an internet article. If you like the guy, he makes you laugh, makes you happy… good for you and good for him.
I think people think it’s “cool” to hate Dane Cook… and hating him makes you some sort of comedic genious. THAT is sad.
October 23rd, 2007 at 2:21 am
Apparently sarcasm, satire, and irony are completely lost on people these days. And yes, this article was far more funny, clever, AND entertaining than both Employee of The Month and Good Luck Chuck combined. It also consumed far less of my life.
October 23rd, 2007 at 2:36 am
EXPLETIVE DELETED shoes.
October 23rd, 2007 at 2:42 am
I SUCK EXPLETIVE DELETED.
BYE.
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:07 am
Dane Cook and Ron Paul are the two biggest threats to the Internet, my sanity and bowel movements, society, children in general and peace in the Middle East.
Interestingly, both Paul and Cook are mostly enjoyed (and loudly spoken of) by the same person: the sweaty, Dorito-encrusted, fat, racist Everyman of Middle America.
Who also likes NASCAR. And eats NASCAR Russett Potatoes with NASCAR hot dogs.
Is there a NASCAR Hungry Man with Dane Cook collectible cards? I’m sure there will be soon!
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:10 am
“Hmmmmm… I haven’t even begun to contemplate the religious significance of Dane Cook.
If you add the numbers of his first name DANE (4+1+14+5), you get 24, which is equivalent to four 6’s. He’s got one more 6 than the Antichrist.
Coincidence???”
Jesus christ Carr… *sigh*
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:10 am
I have been asked whether Dane Cook is as deadly as AIDS, or as dangerous as breast cancer, or as emotionally crippling as autism. That I cannot answer. Let history be the judge.
As emotionally crippling as Autism? EXPLETIVE DELETED you. I am Autistic, and I cannot believe you compared someone who’s comedy you don’t like, to Autism which affects people profoundly. I liked Employee Of The Month and I like his stand up. Just because YOU don’t like him, don’t assume you can make idiotic comments like is a comedian as deadly as AIDS or Cancer. Think before you type.
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:13 am
This short article tells more about you than him.
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:24 am
and the menace continues. today, 10-23-07 is the final day of principal photography of his next feature “Still Waiting”, the sequel to “Waiting…”
October 23rd, 2007 at 4:43 am
I hate the sellout that Dane Cook has become
October 23rd, 2007 at 5:36 am
Unfortunately, the War on Terror hasn’t targeted America’s homegrown terrorist. His woeful, ineapt acting threatens to destroy the excellence that is cinema.
October 23rd, 2007 at 6:22 am
“EXPLETIVE DELETED you. I am Autistic, and I cannot believe you compared someone who’s comedy you don’t like, to Autism which affects people profoundly. I liked Employee Of The Month”
Hmmmm……wow, a retarded person likes a retarded movie who wouldda thunk it.
“For one, the only people mostly I see bashing him are men. Don’t be jealous ’cause hes scored roles with hot chicks”
Right I’m jealous of another pretty boy that’s going to disappear faster than cake at a fat people convention.
Sorry, everyone was thinking it I just HAD to say it. Anyway, on to my argument, Dane USED to be good until he because a sell out, I love his stand up before he because what he is today. I mean even in the insomniac tour he was pretty good, but everything after that is just shit, shit, hot chick, shit, shit, hot chick.
October 23rd, 2007 at 6:27 am
As bad as Dane Cooks acting is, his stand up is a thousand times worse. How can you condemn the lesser of his crimes, and excuse the comedy genocide he is perpetuating. Bad actors come and go, they are a dime a dozen. Once Dane Cook can no longer get movie roles, someone marginally better or marginally worse will fill his shoes. His true crime is the comedy circuit. Cheap nostalgia isn’t comedy. “Hey remember speak n spell”, “remember garbage pail kids”?
October 23rd, 2007 at 8:27 am
I think this is outrageous, and everyone deserves a chance in life to do whatever they wish to. Find a life publisher, I think your the one that should stop writing stupid comments like this!
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:00 am
wow this is sooo stupid hes not doing anything wrong he makes people laugh and if you dont like it then dont watch it you’ll be fine i promise
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:05 am
>dude your EXPLETIVE DELETED retarted, just because you cant be as funny or as talented as him >your whining and bitching about his fame. he entertains the people of this country >and others for the joy that it gives him, not the money, its not his fault everyone >loves him, shit just happens, but please let the man be and quit your bitching…..
s/your/you’re/ the retard. learn some grammar punk!
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:14 am
I like Cook’s stand-up (and yes, I’m aware of the controversy of possibly stolen material, he still is funny in that), and I liked his minor roles in films like Mystery Men, Torque, and Waiting.
As a romantic lead, he’s poison. Perhaps they need to stop making him a romantic lead and try another genre. Comedy (REAL Comedy), Drama, Action, something other than romantic comedy (quickly becoming an oxymoron).
But then again, I don’t think anyone could have done “Good Luck Chuck” any better. The writing was crap, Jessica Alba was equally bland (personality and character wise), and obviously the director didn’t do a good job of translating the material. All exaggeration aside, bad movies are not the fault of just one person.
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:20 am
finally someone is addressing the real problems in this world. I am glad that I am not alone in my disdain for Dane Cook. Bravo Kevin Carr. You deserve a medal.
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:38 am
EXPLETIVE DELETED DANE COOK!
HE EXPLETIVE DELETED SUCKS!!
his humor is that of a two year old
and the retards that think he’s funny are as stupid as him
….. “ITS LIKE THE MOVIE DUNE IN MY CHOCOLATE DRINK!”
WTF?!?!?!?!? thats not funny……. thats just EXPLETIVE DELETED EXPLETIVE DELETED
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:49 am
Dane Cook is a hack, his comedy routine can be broken down like this:
1.Telling a poorly written “remember when/wouldn’t it be cool if/wasn’t that awesome back in the day” joke
2.Jumping around like a retarded chimp on cocaine
3.Yelling the punch line four or five times
4.Telling a decent joke he stole
5.Repeating steps 2 and 3
6.Starting this process over again
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:57 am
This is a useless rant and you obviously make a successful comedian out to be someone who is destroying your own life. It’s clear that you’re borderline psychotic and should seek help in realizing your own life and understanding that celebrities aren’t ruining yours.
Someday you may grow out of it .. otherwise it’s the Funny Farm for you.
October 23rd, 2007 at 11:42 am
A very mediocre attempt at satirical comedy. One can be witty without drudging up horrible illnesses. Dane Cook might suck, but not enough to minimalize AIDS and cancer.
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:12 pm
dane cook’s farts smell like chocolate cake.
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:35 pm
This is freaking rediculous. Some peasant low-life who sits at his sticky keyboard all day long has no sense of humor.
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:44 pm
[…] a salvo at a hip young Hollywood success story. Over at Film School Rejects Kevin Carr wrote an attack on Dane Cook, and over at Suicide Girls “TheCoolerKing†wrote his essay asking why do people like Will […]
October 23rd, 2007 at 2:17 pm
I watched this guy’s standup several months ago. The ONLY time i laughed was on his very last joke (about his girlfriend looking like a DJ while masturbating). I thought he was pathetic without even seeing one of his movies.
October 23rd, 2007 at 2:17 pm
>his movies this year have grossed over 80 million and his concert tour has sold >200,000tix in 8 days …. i love him also … this is really insipid what u have written
So making money is the only measurement of quality of entertainment!? Ah yes, this from people that voted Bush back in and knows how many times Britney Spears has a bowel movement. I weep for our future.
Dane Cook is a hack at best.
October 23rd, 2007 at 4:02 pm
Does anyone here realize that this entire ‘blog’ or ‘post’ or whatever you want to freaking call it is a big freaking joke? Hello? Anyone? There is no real campaign to destroy Dane Cook. This was supposed to be a tongue-in-cheek “article” decrying the “Dane Menace.” Get over yourselves. Also, for those pissed off about the jokes regarding autism, aids etc…didn’t you see that south park? Those things are funny now, we can laugh at them. haha, let the flaming begin.
October 23rd, 2007 at 4:19 pm
Who the hell is Dane Cook???
October 23rd, 2007 at 5:42 pm
It’s not a total joke. There are ribbons, and people are wearing them.
October 23rd, 2007 at 5:54 pm
dane cook is a product of the horrible “comedy” and acting the population has come to accept as funny.
see catch phrases. see “dee tee dee”. see “get er done”. see “you know your a redneck if”. see abc/cbs/nbc/fox etc sitcoms. see the cancilation of arrested development. see cancilation of lucky louie on hbo. see dane cook drawing more than david cross. see adam sandler last five years. see chevy chase/steve martin/ eddie murphy last twenty years. see reality shows. see redneck and dumb being en vogue. see britney. see paris.
you deserve better and dane is our own frankenstein monster. change the channel. watch an indepedent film. read a book.
he must be stopped.
October 23rd, 2007 at 6:19 pm
i really enjoyed this article a lot, it made me laugh at our stupid world, and then i read the first ten comments and all the people giving you (the writer) shit, and then i just hated our stupid world again. #1 who gets mad at what is clearly a JUSTIFIED joke, and #2 who think s dane cook is a good enough **actor to defend?
**not like a real actor, more like a dulled down hilary duff.
October 23rd, 2007 at 8:45 pm
I think Dane Cooks settles the Roe v. Wade debate once and for all. Because, as long as abortion is legal, then there was a chance Dane Cook would not have been born. Granted, it didn’t pan out that way, but at least we had a chance! AT LEAST WE HAD A CHANCE! And maybe the next Dane Cook has been aborted, perhaps we have been spared that indignity, dear friends. And maybe in a parallel dimension Dane Cook has been aborted, and they live on in ignorance of the horrors they have been spared. Oh, how blissful, how spendidly blissful, is that ignorance! So basically, my point is, if you see Dane Cook’s mother, kick her in the uterus. Hard, preferably with steel-toed boots.
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:15 pm
An article about how Dane Cook sucks is supported by an ad for Good Luck Chuck. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:55 pm
You guys are morons. Plain and simple. Get over yourselves you jealous pricks. Use all that energy on something productive, like suicide!
Oh yeah, 1 more thing….go fuck yourself.
October 24th, 2007 at 2:10 am
Bump all you haters Dane Cook is the living end!! He’s one of the funniest comedians out there and he rocks my socks!! Y’all are just a bunch of jealous haters if you are talking smack about him. He’s awesome and he kicks a$$!!
October 24th, 2007 at 2:28 am
“You guys are morons. Plain and simple. Get over yourselves you jealous pricks. Use all that energy on something productive, like suicide!
Oh yeah, 1 more thing….go fuck yourself.”
Wow, congratulations Fucku, you are officially an internet ‘tard. What’s with the gay comebacks? Seriously, everyone else has stated their argument (or at least tried) and all you can muster up is the VERY overused “suicide” comeback and then you sign off with “go fuck yourself”? You are about as unoriginal as Dane Cook is unfunny (which in case you don’t know is VERY)
October 24th, 2007 at 9:41 am
[…] people want to Stop Dane Cook. Really? […]
October 24th, 2007 at 9:42 am
Alex, I think Fucku IS Dane Cook.
In all seriousness, I think it’s Cook’s album “Retaliation” where he stops in the middle to yell at a member of the audience. That’s a look at what real Dane Cook is, that’s aways my favorite part of these comedy albums, when something unexpected happens and you see what a comedian is made of. He goes into a bit about Daddy hitting Mommy at the dinner table. It’s pretty funny and off the cuff, and I give him props for that.
I know Kevin is not putting down Dane Cook’s stand-up, just his film career, but I think it’s a pretty thankless debate. Dane Cook is a mediocre actor sure, and yes he does steal bits from other comedians like Louis CK, but I know enough people that still f’ing LOVE this guy. I’m sure he’ll go the way of the Pauly Shores of the world, just give it time. His schtick will get old (thanks to over-exposure), his movies won’t improve, and once another comedian comes along to capitalize on what’s popular at the moment (for Cook it was this sense of New Nostalgia) he’ll be irrelevant. Time will heal this Kevin. Time will destroy Dane Cook faster than your ribbons and articles.
October 24th, 2007 at 9:44 am
We can only hope, Josh. We can only hope.
October 24th, 2007 at 10:19 am
Concert prices for Charlotte Bobcats Arena: $30.00, $50.00. $75.00, $100.00 (no lie, check out http://www.charlottebobcatsarena.com/default.asp?id=33&objId=358) I thought this was a joke. There are much more talented people who can sing, dance and act that I’ve paid so much less to see. Thank you for putting out there what so many of us with a real sense of what is humorous and witty have been disgusted with for so long. You must give him his dues, though, for having the foresight to use social networking, posting, blogging and video sites as they are the ONLY reason we are having this issue.
October 24th, 2007 at 12:21 pm
I think that the sheer amount of comments on this piece prove how divisive the issue is. And because of that, the threat of Dane Cook seems all the more real.
The real threat of Dane Cook is that he’s not threat at all. I’m sure I’ve seen others claim this elsewhere, but Dane Cook is a success because he doesn’t irritate anyone. He’s so middle of the road, blah funny that no one can not like him. There are moments in his stand up that I think are brilliant and well-delivered, but for the most part it’s the same old gags and punchlines. I doubt greatly that anyone would truly find his acting stellar - in the same way that Larry the Cable Guy will never feel the warm glow of true dramatic praise.
And perhaps we’ve hit on something there. Why do some mindless movies tank while others soar? Maybe, just maybe it’s the acting. I’ll give two examples:
Employee of the Month - Dane Cook and Jessica Simpson do not provide much in the way of chops. The movie tanks. The premise was not solid, but could have survived with better writing and acting.
Harold and Kumar - Kal Penn and John Cho carry the entire thing. Kal Penn has proven himself as an incredible talent outside of the stoner-comedy with The Namesake and John Cho stretched his acting into the more dramatic with Better Luck Tomorrow. This movie had an awesomely mindless premise - who really thought that a movie about two guys driving to get food would work? - and yet it is held in high regard.
So maybe for a mindless flick you need truly great talents. Belushi in Animal House, anyone?
Oh, and Dane Cook is double-plus bad. Just for the record.
October 24th, 2007 at 2:43 pm
Ok, I love Dane Cook. I find his jokes hilarious. I stumbled this site, and was shocked to see these “fags”, if i may, insulting one of the people that I would happily spend hours of my life watching Dane and laughing like crazy. I appreciate all of your opinions, they have made me think, which i love. But as I sit here, watching “Dane Cook: Vicious Circle” and insistantly LMAO, I cant help but to disagree with the lot of you. It is possible that all of you are just jealous, and want to be just like him, I know I do. I would love to have his fame, his income, but one thing I would not love, is to have screable peons like you, to create this page. All he does is try to create a little happiness in the world. Shame on you for making the world that little bit colder. Lord knows we dont need it, we have enough already.
October 24th, 2007 at 6:36 pm
Anyone who can support someone, who straight up stole material from another comic, is just idiotic. His entire stand up is based on the fact that he screams, yells, and then falls over. Nothing he talks about is relevant to life, regular day occurrences, or even funny made up occurrences. He just rambles about stupid stuff, and then screams his punchlines to hope to get a laugh. I luckily have only seen him in waiting, where he played Dane Cook. Wow that was tough, he yelled stupid stuff at people whenever he opened his mouth, and had a cynical look on his face the entire time. I could care less if they continue to put him in “romantic comedies”, I just don’t want him in real roles in real movies, because he so unbelievable.
October 24th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
EHEHEHEHE
You guys are truly morons.
Dane cook is a GOD!!!!!!!!!
We shall all worship upon thee, and those who dont, shall kill your fucking selves.
Douchebags.
I FUCKED YOUR MOTHER!!!!
[This Comment Edited by the Administrator. The Author basically goes on to write “FUCK YOU COCKSUCKERS” about 300 more times… You weren’t missing much.]
October 24th, 2007 at 7:42 pm
hehe….theres a good luck chuck ad over there——–>
Thats why this site is for REJECTS
cuz you all are rejects, and you’re mad about Dane, and..well..hes not a reject.
October 24th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
What the hell is going on here? I don’t understand why people are getting up in arms about this. I mean, of course it’s common knowledge that Dane Cook is the comedy equivalent of AIDS infected Anthrax, But if for some reason you have bad taste and think he is funny, so what? Getting all worked up about some dude writing a sarcastic blog entry is not the end of the world.
October 24th, 2007 at 11:37 pm
lol
i love dane cook
who cares if he yells his jokes?
they are still funny as hell
i love his jokes, and yes they do relate to life
the one joke about fights with girlfriends and such
and how you criticize every aspect of a person’s directions
i mean LOL FOR GOD’S SAKE
that is hilarious
“turn right at the red house, that maroon you fucking idiot!”
you know its funny
you just want something to bitch and moan about
October 25th, 2007 at 12:07 am
IM not getting worked up…..its funny…..im havin a great time making fun of these idiots..
YAY for me
John Grimm is the MAN
October 25th, 2007 at 12:11 am
Holy shit people the article is a joke. Seriously it compared a person’s comedy to AIDs! Holy flying greased jesus take a chill pill. And the person who just repeatedly wrote “COCKSUCKERS FUCK YOU COCKSUCKERS FUCK YOU COCKSUCKERS FUCK YOU” you are basically reinforcing the whole idea that everyone who listens to Dane Cook is retarded….. so way to go. I personally think his stand up is funny as hell and he makes mediocre movies.
October 25th, 2007 at 4:03 am
“#
lol
i love dane cook
who cares if he yells his jokes?
they are still funny as hell
i love his jokes, and yes they do relate to life
the one joke about fights with girlfriends and such
and how you criticize every aspect of a person’s directions
i mean LOL FOR GOD’S SAKE
that is hilarious
“turn right at the red house, that maroon you fucking idiot!â€
you know its funny
you just want something to bitch and moan about”
See that’s the kind of comedy we have all been talking about, what does he do when he’s saying “that’s maroon you fucking idiot”? He SCREAMS it, because that’s all he can do, make people by screaming and/or making a complete ass of himself, and that my friend is not comedy. If you want some really good comedy look up some Rodney Dangerfeild, Mitch Hedburg, or Louis C.K. Those are the guys you see all these guys now-a-days ripping off. As for wanting something to moan about, I could start a thread moaning about school or girl trouble, but I don’t because it’s all trivial stuff. I only replied to this because I don’t want to see Dane in any more movies like Dan in Real Life, where all he’s going to do is fuck it up and steal glory from REAL actors like Carrel.
October 26th, 2007 at 11:44 am
dane cook is the most amazingly funny, gorgeous man on this planet. and in my opinion, you are jealous. you only wish you were as sweet as him. but u arent. and you never will be. so give up.
October 26th, 2007 at 1:41 pm
worst….actor….ever, im glad others find him repulsive
October 26th, 2007 at 7:25 pm
I love how everyone that loves Dane Cook can’t tolerate the fact that someone can just not like him, plain and simple. Since when does someone have to be jealous to not find his jokes funny, or his acting believable?
I don’t really dislike him, but he’s not the greatest… Jealousy doesn’t factor in there anywhere, as I have no desire to be famous (especially for mediocrity). Some people are just not fans of his, is that so hard to believe?
October 27th, 2007 at 3:54 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
You all have no lives.
this argument is so amazing.
probably the funniest thing i have read in a long time.
people that hate dane cook, people that worship him.
he is a person.
Get over yourselves.
October 27th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Alex copies :EXPLETIVE DELETED you. I am Autistic, and I cannot believe you compared someone who’s comedy you don’t like, to Autism which affects people profoundly. I liked Employee Of The Monthâ€
Alex says:Hmmmm……wow, a retarded person likes a retarded movie who wouldda thunk it.
Alex copies: “For one, the only people mostly I see bashing him are men. Don’t be jealous ’cause hes scored roles with hot chicksâ€
Alex says: Right I’m jealous of another pretty boy that’s going to disappear faster than cake at a fat people convention.
HAHAHA alex you are probably a 35 year old, single, fatt old wrinkly pair a testicles.
That masterbates to victorias secret catalogs while you bash dane cook on the internet.
Wow, you need a life.
and you need to get laid.
October 28th, 2007 at 12:43 am
This site is amazing and whoever doesn’t agree should die Dane Cook is terrible I wish I was blind and def when I see or hear his acting or comedy
October 28th, 2007 at 3:00 am
Maggy, if you had used ANY common snese at all you would have clicked on the link in my name which leads you directly to my myspace page. So next time you feel the need to say something…….don’t.
October 28th, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Alex,
I am a fat guy, and I’ve been fat for years. Can you put me in touch with the people who run those “fat people conventions”? I want to get in on that… especially if they give out free cake.
Kevin
October 30th, 2007 at 7:50 am
[…] read more | digg story […]
October 30th, 2007 at 5:09 pm
[…] Is there no justice in the world? Not when Dane Cook continues to make movies.[…] Thanks to sepultura for providing this nice story on Digg (more than 1680 […]
October 31st, 2007 at 6:30 am
Worst comedian/actor ever. he must be stopped.
November 6th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
Have you nothing better to do with your time than to sit around on your computer and bash other people? And Dane Cook is a menace to society???? It is people like you that make this world the vapid, shallow, and judgemental machine it is. You are ridiculous. Seriously.
November 9th, 2007 at 1:01 pm
i dont get why people put so much effort into hating dane cook he’s an entertainer personally i find him hilarious and pretty much everyone i know thinks he’s funny as well if u dont like him then dont watch him but i agree u shouldnt compare him to the war or aids or cancer those things are horrible and deadly. dislike him as an entertainer like i care wat u like or dislike but dont compare him to things that devestate millions of peoples lives.
November 9th, 2007 at 2:58 pm
i personally am in love with Dane cook.
Everyone has the right to their own oppinion so its a choice that you make whether or not to support him. The choice is your so honestly just stop complaining and live your own life. You dont have to contribute to the money that he makes by watching the movies or going to his shows. Please stop bashing Dane Cook. He is a highly respectable man to have claimed so many devoted fans. Im just here to say Im one of the very many.
November 11th, 2007 at 3:57 pm
I received my stop dane cook ribbon and pamphlet the other day, dane cook is fucking terrible and I will be wearing it everywhere.
My lifes dream is to be the one person who punches dane cook in the face for no reason, just like in his “HEY I WENT TO THE DMV ID RATHER BE PUNCHED IN THE FACE” bit.
November 14th, 2007 at 2:36 am
lol you guys are such big rejects it isn’t funny. you know that he IS funny and almost everyone in the U.S. that doesn’t despise people because your more likable than themselves agree so how about this quit slandering his name and make a name for yourselfs
November 15th, 2007 at 1:12 am
[…] history be the judge. Is there no justice in the world? Not when Dane Cook continues to make movies.read more | digg story Tags: Share […]
November 15th, 2007 at 1:18 am
[…] history be the judge. Is there no justice in the world? Not when Dane Cook continues to make movies.read more | digg story Tags: Share […]
November 17th, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Check his Myspace and then start your ignorant retarded envious campaign you Jack azz!!!!!!!!!!! Just check it!!!! Remember he was a COMEDIAN FIRST, everything else comes second to him just like if any of you dumps who are bashing him had the opportunity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SUFI BIZNATCHES
November 17th, 2007 at 8:37 pm
Actually one more thing keep talking about him and put his name out there more especially in the MEDIA your acually helping dip fluck! It’s a VICIOUS CIRCLE anyway!!! LMAO. PS YOU SHOULD BY IT (VICIOUS CIRCLE) another one of his master pieces muahahahahaahahaaaaa!!!
PS SUFI UP YOUR AZZSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
love ya dane
November 17th, 2007 at 10:01 pm
Let me just lend my two cents on this topic.
DANE COOK SUCKS AT ACTING.
DANE COOK SUCKS AT COMEDY.
DANE COOK IS AWESOME AT STEALING MATERIAL.
DANE COOK IS AWESOME AT RUINING MOVIES.
That about sums it up.
November 17th, 2007 at 10:05 pm
Whatever he is he does it better . Haven’t noticed anybody else doing it but HIM!!!!
November 20th, 2007 at 4:07 am
Not a fan of Dane Cook at all, his humor must be see some sort of parody soon (unless cheesy SNL has done it.) Not really thrilled with any young comedy right now. George Carlin, Lewis Black, Bill Cosby, Robin Williams, and Richard Pryor have all entertained hundreds of millions without ever needing a Myspace page. True, Dane may have 2Million plus “friends”. But an acting career HE DOES NOT POSESS! Though I’ll vote for more Jessica Simpson on the screen, I just turn the volume down when she talks. hah!
November 20th, 2007 at 5:18 am
Sam said: “and the menace continues. today, 10-23-07 is the final day of principal photography of his next feature “Still Waiting”, the sequel to “Waiting…””
Not true - “Still Waiting…” did wrap, but Dane was not cast. He was offered the role of Floyd but passed because he was becoming too big a start to do a sequel - he even refused to shoot a cameo appearance.
November 20th, 2007 at 5:18 pm
Ok I agree he’s not the greatest actor. That’s because he’s a comedian first and foremost. His comedy is modern and certain types of people understand and can relate to it. Which is alot. Yes I hope he doesn’t go the other way and start making movies and stop comedy. Maybe he’s just trying it out and it could be somethigng he enjoys is it a crime? There’s so many actors out there that shouldn’t even be cast into a reality show there so bad. So come on give him a break. As for myspace I think that’s the most fantastical thing he has done. He’s devoted to his fans and we as fans feel connected to him on a different level. He makes us feel involved in his career which is personal and he doesn’t have to do that. Who ELSE has done that?? What celebrity? I don’t even see him as a celebrity he’s just a funny as GUY who I invite into my living room everyday to get my laughs!!! That’s different, he’s different and that’s why we’re here talking about him. And Barber come on JESSICA SIMPSON!! Are you kidding me she can’t even sing she swallows the mic!!! LMAO!!!!
SUFI ;)
November 20th, 2007 at 6:54 pm
Ps. Waitng was a stupid movie anyway I wouldnt want to do a cameo or be in it either.
November 22nd, 2007 at 3:08 pm
[…] history be the judge. Is there no justice in the world? Not when Dane Cook continues to make movies.read more | digg story « Singer Robert Goulet Dies at […]
November 23rd, 2007 at 10:51 am
Interesting-most ‘females’ have no problem with Dane Cook-but the ‘men’,
correction, ‘boys’, do. You guys have way too many issues and way too little
self-esteem. Get a life and laugh a little!!
November 27th, 2007 at 11:52 am
God bless you, Kevin Carr. Thank you for helping spread the word of this malignant tumor (Dane Cook) which threatens to eat the world of comedy from the inside out. When Hollywood exec types see these herds of cattle filling stadiums and laughing at HACKS like Dane Cook, they will naturally associate a COMPLETE lack of talent with the following symbols:
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
The result will be an even wider array of talentless, joke-stealing hacks for them market to the dumbed-down American populace who will gladly swallow every last drop of urine-flavored comedy being poured down their collective throat.
November 28th, 2007 at 8:08 am
All requested ribbons have been sent out. Please wait at least two weeks to email about the status.
The Stop Dane Cook campaign is off to a roaring start. We had requests from 40 states, 4 Canadian provinces and two additional foreign countries.
Spread the word!
November 29th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
WOW! I got my ribbon today :)
I only live like a mile away from you guys lol
November 29th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
Ryan — are you stalking us?
November 29th, 2007 at 4:41 pm
I happen to know where the return address is located..So yeah you could say thats stalking.
November 29th, 2007 at 8:05 pm
I’m not stalking you… And you should think about getting better curtains. I saw that frilly lacey thing you were wearing when you wrote your latest comment.
November 30th, 2007 at 12:03 am
That was my brothers girlfriend. I’m guessing your that black accord that took my parking spot in front of my house today?
November 30th, 2007 at 7:42 pm
this is really funny because i like dane cook
its really a funny joke though. good job.
you’re almost as funny as dane!
December 2nd, 2007 at 1:32 pm
I’ve received my ribbon and have never been happier! I feel a part of something great.
December 5th, 2007 at 1:31 am
It is apolling how you would react in such an inappropriate manner towards Dane Cook. What you say makes no sense. How is he endangering children? If you have a problem with the material he is saying or his roles in a movie…then don’t let you kids watch him. It’s ridiclous that you are assuming that Owen Wilson’s attempting suicide was because of Dane? Your crazy. You need to get your facts right. By Comparing him to AIDS and CANCER is despicable and very inappropriate in this manner. Almost commiting suicide after watching his movies? Well you didn’t do it….so get OVER IT!!!! Stop complaining. If you want to spread the word…………………..spread DANE COOK IS AMAZING, A LEGEND, and FUNNY AS HELL.
It was amazing meeting you DANE!! SUFI!
December 10th, 2007 at 3:32 pm
Hey, I have an idea. How about you tell him directly how you feel about him and his shit?
Phone number: 310-910-3985
E-mail: danecook@mac.com
You’re welcome! Spread the word.
December 14th, 2007 at 1:22 am
Wow. This is insane. Its funny how all the haters on here hope to defeat Dane’s tidal wave of popularity. How is he a malignant tumor? He makes people laugh! That’s his job! You say he isn’t funny? Fine, that’s your opinion, one that most definitely isn’t shared by the thousands and thousands of people that support him and pay huge money to see him live. Its hard to maintain what you think is a credible argument when deep down you know that some petty web-bashing is the real “malignant”. Its not his fault you don’t share the sense of humor he brilliantly delivers to his fans. Rock on Dane!!!
December 14th, 2007 at 8:47 pm
All you dane cook haters dont know what you are talking about. Dane Cook is AMAZING. Hes a great actor and comedian. If you don’t like him then fine, but are you really that pathetic.. I guess so. If you guys dislike him that much then dont listen or watch him. Its that simple.
SU-FI
December 18th, 2007 at 7:04 pm
Air, or common household objects, are funnier than Dane Cook. Dane Cook is the measure of who should be locked into cattle cars and hauled off to work camps. Dane Cook’s fans are more dangerous than any criminal.
December 22nd, 2007 at 8:01 pm
Dane Cook is the best !@#$%&* Comedian in the WORLD. HOW CAN YOU HATE HIM…HE IS GOD! YOU ARE SO FREAKING STUPID 2 say that !@#$ about him…DANE ROCKS! who ever made this website is gay
December 24th, 2007 at 9:14 pm
the only thing i have to say about this is … WOW. stop dane cook? his movies may not be that great but dane isnt supposed to be an actor anyways. his comedy is the shiz… and u have a prob with dane cook’s comedy then STFU. u have no idea what you are talking about and if it was up to me i hope that kool aid man busts through the walls of ur living room and ur all like NAUGHTY NAUGHTY kool aid but you wont becuause youre anti-dane. If dane cook didnt exist … i would have no love in my life. i love DANE EFFING COOK! .. and im proud. -superbleeder! obby, BAMF.. and all that good stuff. (hence the Dane bits) u wouldnt kno if u hate dane. SUCK ON THAT =]
December 27th, 2007 at 12:02 am
you guys are stupid dane cook is awsome who cares if he uses bad language get a life and stop trying to censor good comedians
January 1st, 2008 at 3:51 pm
Dane Cook is one of the worst comedians alive!
I’m glad that there are other people in the world who agree with me, I was just starting to think my friends and I were the only ones who hate him. Then I started wondering what was wrong with the world if people actually find him funny?
Turns out no one really likes him.
I will never see a movie that has dane cook in it no matter how good it looks because I know that he will make money off it.
He needs to get a different job, you know, one he’s actually good at!
January 1st, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Sorry in my earlier post I said he is one of the worst comedians ever, what I meant to say was that he IS THE WORST COMEDIAN EVER!!!
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:49 am
PLEASE! PLEASE! WATCH “SPIRAL” IN VIDEO SECTION OF DANE’S MYSPACE - HE WROTE IT, DIRECTED IT, ACTED IN IT - THEN JUDGE.
January 30th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
I forgot to thank you for sending me a Poo Brown SDC ribbon in December, it made my Christmas! All the way out here in London to boot. Stop Dane Cook, he can still make a living off standup, he just needs to not “act”. Peace.
February 7th, 2008 at 11:44 am
im 14 and ive liked dane cook for over a year now. because he is really funny and i loved Employee of the Month. & if dane cook is The Antichrist….then your stupid.
and your a really bad dad. i would hate you.
February 7th, 2008 at 11:45 am
& kevin….you suck at life
February 7th, 2008 at 11:46 am
and your last name is fucking carr wow you really suck at life. k? k.
February 9th, 2008 at 12:03 am
[…] my heart skipped a beat, as I know someone else who wants to Stop Dane Cook. (Hint: Look right here). Photo by Willie […]
February 26th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?
Dane Cook is not an abomination, he his simply making movies. And if you noticed, Owen Wilson is still making movies and is fine now. There is nothing wrong with him, and hollywood is hollywood. Your are a messed up person and need to seek help.
February 27th, 2008 at 12:30 am
Dane Cook rocks and smoking hot!!!!!
February 27th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Kevin CARR: That is the most faggish name by the way.
u seem like one of those guys that didnt make it in life
so u got to make other peoples lives miserable but really
they dont care they just sit back and laugh at your dumb
ass while you sit there on your computer and make yourself
look like a complete bitch. But obviously you do not have
anything better to do in your life, than to worry about a big-time
star that everyone likes and the ones that do not like him it is
because they are jelous of him and his fame and popularity…just like you!
March 1st, 2008 at 1:25 pm
You people make me sad due to the patheticness of a site devoted to stop Dane Cook. Complaining won’t do anything, it just makes you look ignorant. So you people don’t like Dane Cook, SO WHAT, there are many people that do. Oh and one more thing,
Dane Cook is funny, get over it!
March 6th, 2008 at 9:33 am
okay. So what if Dane Cook is inappropriate. You’re only giving him MORE credit by
telling the world that he is a menace. Grow up. There are people out there who are
killing people because of their race and people bombing schools. WHAT HARM DOES
ONE REALLY FUNNY MAN DO?! The only way he can be harmful is if you give him the
credit to be. And that’s just sad. I think Osama Bin Laden is a little more important
than Dane Cook.
You people make me sick.
March 11th, 2008 at 11:19 am
umm is this some kind of joke or are you serious?
this is stupid i couldn’t stop laughing
it sounds like you’re just a jealous little baby or something
you hate Dane Cook just because he’s in movies? (movies i havn’t seen because they don’t look that great)
when i googled Dane Cook i saw this and i thought
oh so this is about children and the dirtyness of Dane
but no it looks like something about his movies..
i’m very confused
March 14th, 2008 at 10:27 am
Ok, I personally love Dane Cook. He is an AMAZING actor, he has charm and just natural ability. Did you know he was cast as the lead in his Highschools production of Grease??? He just has natural ability. And his stand-up is the best, just b/c you dont agree with what he says and dont like his style doesnt mean you have to bash him!!!! Get over yourselves!!
March 30th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
This entire article is stupid. dane cook is a good guy and a great commedian. He isnt really harming anyone by acting. Hell if someone gave me millions of dollars to do these movies i would do it. And heres an idea if you dont like him or his movies….. DONT WATCH THEM!!!!
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:10 pm
Hey, i’m tired of people always bashing dane cook and saying that he steals his comedy. Look, the bottom line is that EVERYBODY steals comedy from eachother. You know that you see something funny happen to somebody else on th street, you capitalize on it and make it your own story. Every great comedian does this. as for Dane’s acting, i agree, it sux. Comedy is his strong point. There are different types of comedy also, some people like dane cooks spazmatic exuberence of physical language(to dumb it down, his crazy body language) or his sound effects. i do, but others like other types of comedy. Every great comedian builds their own style, this is dane’s. if you don’t like it, you’re not forced to watch or listen to it. He’s not an epidemic liek you say he is, he’s just another comedian making waves.
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:14 pm
lol, i spelled “like” wrong, and missed the e on “the”
April 17th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
I actually google’d “Dane Cook bad actor” to find people that have had the same revelation. I recently saw Mr. Brook’s…ugh he’s a terrible actor…He’s o.k. for ridiculous comedy’s (but not Dan in Real Life-horrible in that too)…but any real acting he is not cut out for. His acting is very forced, and unconvincing. *Shiver*…with all the money they put into movies, why can’t they figure out casting sometimes…
April 21st, 2008 at 11:04 pm
Wow. Is this a joke? Why waste your time on this?
May 13th, 2008 at 8:09 pm
Like everybody else, Dane Cook gets worse the more popular they get…When he was a premium blender, or lucky enough to get his 30 minute comedy central special, was when he was in his prime…the 15-21 range of people are what make dane cook severely overrated. EVERY comedian, actor gets worse with popularity (Jack Black, for example), and there is really no disputing it..I’m not playing the “selling-out” card, but the fact is, people’s opinions can be and often are based in unrealistic claims…This i’m sure is coming off as wildly preachy and pretentious, and i’m trying my best to keep this short, but this is a topic i feel very strongly about..I liked retaliation, but I feel like Dane Cook has become what i like to call the “Boondock Saints” of comedy…At first, when he was somewhat underground and relatively unknown, it was great..Upon achieving mainstream popularity, frat boys and other people fitting that stereotypical mode have beaten it severely into the ground..I say the Boondock Saints because people who preach and quote the movie religiously still believe that they are part of a select group who have seen it..Dane Cook is kinda funny still, but its his fans that make his shit unbearable, to me at least..