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G.I. Joe fans, remove your middle finger from the rip cord… there’s an update to the breaking story we posted mere minutes ago. News moves pretty goddamn fast on these here interwebs, especially it seems when it’s completely fabricated…

Earlier today we reported that Stephen Sommers, the guy that Michael Bay and Uwe Boll use as punchlines when they make bad director jokes, was fired from post-production on G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra. Well not so fast says the PR firm of El Guapo & Bonaventura… an update has appeared on the original post over at Latino Review calling the report “very unfair, completely untrue, hit-whoring.” Strong words indeed.

Producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura now says Sommer “was never asked to leave or been fired or any of that. That’s ridiculous. The movie tested very well.” He continues. “We tested very well… It hurts a guy’s career when people go around talking about that he was fired or he didn’t do a good job and truth is he did a really good job. People are going to enjoy the movie and the test audiences enjoyed the movie. He did a very good job the movie tested well and it couldn’t be more false that the studio in anyway did anything negatively to Steve.” He goes on to say they “tested it and each time it just got better and better.”

So apparently it tested well.

What doesn’t Bonaventura say? He says nothing about Sommers being barred from the editing room. He says nothing about the hiring of Stuart Baird to re-cut the movie. And he says nothing about the original claim that he himself “was told his services were no longer needed on the film.”

Interesting? Or could you really not give a flying-and-diving-through-a-bus fuck anymore…

Do you now care even less?