There are times when the glamorous life of online entertainment reporter has its trying moments. One was back when I first heard The Smurfs were going to be made into a live action film. That moment turned out to be a gold mine for silliness and it has receded into memory with only the occasional flashback.

Today I see another moment to try my soul has arrived. The news that Gilligan’s Island is being made into a movie. You know about movies? They play them in theaters where people congregate to share the experience of the world created in a film.

Gilligan’s Island is a world I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I hate Gilligan’s Island. I mean in case you think I’m pulling punches, I really hate it. I hate Gilligan, the Skipper too, the millionaire and his wife, the Professor and Mary Ann there on Gilligan’s Island.

Why do I hate it? Let me think. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking. Because it’s terrible. It’s not funny. I’ve seen it in syndication where good shows go to live magical lives and every time an episode  is played an angel gets its wings. Then there’s syndication were bad shows go to torment anyone with a remote control.

Cruising along and hit the wrong channel and you might see Gilligan with his coconut phone. He did have one didn’t he?
I can’t say I know for sure.

I guess I need to toss out some real news about this event. The original producer of the show Sherwood Schwartz will produce with his son Lloyd Schwartz. Gilligan’s Island is being treated like a fine time piece to be passed down reverentially from father to son.  I always thought parents wanted their children to do better than them.

There’s no word on casting yet, though the people behind this venture want Micheal Cera as Gilligan. I’m thinking go all the way and get Jack Black to play the Skipper too. I’m thinking go upscale and get Michael Caine and Dame Judi Dench as the millionaire and his wife.  Do a world wide casting search for The Professor and Mary Ann. Get the excitement going. Make some actor’s dreams come true.

Before I forget, Warner Bros is behind this venture  along with Atlas Entertainment. Clearly someone has sold their soul to the Devil to get this stellar creative opportunity. There’s just no other explanation for it.