Movie Style Guy: The Holiday

Posted by Robert Fure (robert@filmschoolrejects.com) on December 7, 2006

Ah Christmas time. The cold weather, warm fires, egg nog, snow. Fantastic stuff. Except that here in Hollywood, CA, it’s 80 degrees outside, our fireplace is broken (and the landlord refuses to fix it because it’s 80 degrees outside) and snow is clearly not in the forecast. We do have egg nog though, so all is not lost.

In honor of the holidays and the Jude Law/Cameron Diaz/Jack Black/Kate Winslet (that is a mouthful!) romantic comedy The Holiday (review) we here at the Film School Rejects decided to give you a little holiday helper. Now that plot of the movie is that two romantically troubled women switch homes for the holiday. In doing so, each meets someone new and different to fall in love with. Ain’t love grand?

So we thought we’d give you some travel tips. Now, that’s cool and all, but is it Style-ish enough? No. So we’re giving you something else. Not only are we going to tell you how to travel this season but how to get laid find love when you get there! Let’s do this.

Step 1. Choose a destination.

What are you feeling this season? We’re going to simply break down your options. They become:

A) Home for the Holidays. This is if you’ve moved away and want to return to small town Pennsylvania, big city Texas, or quiet hamlet in England.

B) Traditional Vacation. These destinations are popular winter holiday spots that maintain the winter feeling. Places like London, Paris, or on the slightly tamer side, New York.

C) Exotic Vacation. Going to these places you basically abandon all that is traditional Christmas time stuff, you Communists. Odds are you hate the snow and cold and headed for some tropical beach. Sellout.

D) Staying Put. Not really a vacation, but I’ll let you know how to enjoy it. Well, as much as possible.

My favorite travel spots:

London, England. A place with lots to do and a festive holiday spot. Even some Christmas-like weather, at least it’s damned cold. Lots of bars and a healthy night life.

Washington, DC. Parades all over the place, lots of hot night life areas, a lot of travellers and out of towners - few locals around for Christmas.

Italy. I like Palermo, but it’s small and you won’t have a ton to do, but other areas in Italy are vibrant and fun.

Home. Home for me is Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. When I get back I’m a big shot and everyone wants to talk to me. Little do they know I don’t really do much in Hollywood, but it doesn’t matter. Home for the holidays is always nice.

My preferred travel:

Airplane. I love flying. Its fast and fun. Prices can be high, but if you’re smart you can get a sweet deal.

Drive. I like to drive myself around so if you’re close, consider driving or renting a car when you get there.

Trains are awesome if it’s an option, but often expensive when weighed against how much time it takes. I like to avoid bus travel as its long, boring, slow, and crowded this time of year. But it’s economical.

Step 2. Travel time.

Remember to book early if you can. Ticket prices rise and fall dramatically during peak travel times. A useful site like FareCast.com can help you get the best deals. Odds are you’re going to want to fly if you’re covering a lot of ground (or water, you international jet-setter you) but if the destination is local, you may want to just drive it. Either way, if flying arrive early (bare minimum of 1 hour, preferably closer to 2 hours) and expect delays. If driving, leave yourself an extra window of time to sit in traffic. Ain’t the holidays great?

Step 3. Know your destination.

Be familar with where you’re at. If you just flew into the Ivory Coast for Christmas, congratulations, you’re an idiot. And you’ll probably die. Kidding. But not really. Some places are best avoided, especially if you’re an America these days. On the lighter side, if you’re flying into England know that “Cheers” means thanks and in Paris it’s ok to hate Americans and nap from 12-2pm.

Step 4. Find a place to stay.

If you’re staying put or going home, this is probably easy. Abroad, use web-based booking services to look up a nice little hotel or Bed and Breakfast and book online. Again, do it early. These things fill up fast. Consider staying in locations that are either isolated for a private romantic time (if you brought someone with you) or near city centers and hotspots if you’re looking for love.

Step 5. Find the party.

It’s the holidays. We’re here to have some fun. If you’re at home, you probably want to spend some time with family. If you’re not with family, pick friends. If you’ve travelled or are feeling eager to get out there, ask around at shops or friendly people you’ll meet to find the cool places to be for holiday parades and hot bars. Also check local news papers and programming.

OK OK OK. Fine. Now. How to meet women over the Holidays. Well first, let me help out the ladies. Girls, if you’re manhunting over the holiday season, let me tell you how to reel him in. Go anywhere a man might be. A store, a bar, the street corner. Express interest in him by saying hello or asking a question. Smile. Case closed, you got him in the bag.

Now for the hard part. Dudes.

For the Traveller:

For those of you who went abroad, keep your accent. I know it’s cool to pretend to have a British accent in London, but they here that all the time. Your accent is your number one thing you’ve got going for you. Chicks dig it, universally. So don’t hide it.

Hit the pubs. In Europe, drinking isn’t as looked down upon and heading out after work, or during work, is very common and acceptable. So buddy up at the bar, grab a pint of something respectable and scope the scene. Don’t talk about the weather and don’t bring up the fact you’re a tourist. Let them ask. Hint: The closer it gets to the actual holiday, the higher the percentage of desperate singles in bars. Use that to your advantage or stay away as they may be damaged goods.

For the Home Visitor:

So you’re home. With family. That doesn’t mean you don’t sneak out once or twice. With the holiday season in America, a great place to meet up with singles is parades or restaurant-bars semi-close to the parade routes. They bring out lots of people, a festive mood erupts, love is everywhere. If you’re from a small town, hit whatever local bar pops on Christmas or search for a laidback time. Let people know, casually, that you’re home for the holidays. This sparks interest because you’re someone who managed to get out of this place. You’ve made something more of yourself. Even if you haven’t, let them think it.

Exotic Vacation Afficianado:

You’re a tool. Many tropical areas don’t celebrate Christmas so you may not even have that opener. Treat your vacation just like any other and enjoy the sun. Present yourself as ‘getting away from it all’ and looking for a bit of adventure and a lot of relaxation. Look for people having fun and check these areas out. Odds are the holiday bug won’t be too much of a factor here, but thats probably ok considering you’re probably a communist. Haha, gotcha!

The Stay At Home Guy:

So you didn’t go anywhere. That’s ok. Lots of other people didn’t either. This is equal parts easy and tricky. That doesn’t make sense? Think about. Lots of people stay home end up alone and want company, thats the easy. However, because they’re alone, odds of them going out go down. So you’ll want to pick up some unconventional pickup areas. Scope out the edge of parade routes, shopping areas and parks. Book stores are another good one, as well as coffee shops. Places where other people are but it’s ok to be solitary. Approach slowly and carefully, don’t be too aggressive. Be nice.

Some General Warnings:

Don’t obsessively talk about yourself. Ask questions and listen.

Don’t obsessively talk about your love of the holidays, or your hate. If you’re way too into it, they’ll start to wonder. If you hate the holidays, they’ll think you’re a scrooge.

Don’t play up the fact you’re travelling. They’ll figure it out. On the same note, don’t be depressed you’ve got nowhere to go or play a “lonely” card. It’s depressing. Your best bet is to just offer to meet up for a coffee somewhere. Let that lead to a walk. You sly dog, you.

Well I think I’ve given you guys a lot of general stuff to work with. We talked about the basics of travel and some very basic guidelines on how to maybe find love, or at least a couple nights of enjoyment, this holiday season. The rest is up to you.

Happy Holidays and Merry Mutha [Edit]in’ Christmas.

Yours in milk and cookies,

Robert “The Ghost of Christmas Love” Fure.

Read more articles by Robert Fure