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Editor’s Intro: In our Year in Review, we’ve done a lot to celebrate the best films of the year. We’ve chronicled our favorite performances, talked about the movies that rocked us in an above-average year, and delivered article upon article about the films we dug the most. But that wouldn’t be quite as fun if there wasn’t the other side — the worst of the year. And to be honest, we have even more fun picking on these duds than we do reviewing some of the better movies. Why? Because we like to beat on things. That’s what men (and the women we’ve met) like to do.

So to do this year’s bottom of the barrel justice, we put our resident lover of all things bad Kevin Carr to work, to find the absolute worst movies of 2009:

10. All About Steve

Here it is… the Sandra Bullock movie that isn’t going to get nominated for anything (except maybe a Razzie or a GAG Award). With a shifting release date and an awkward break from the romantic comedy formula, this film about a fortysomething cruciverbalist-turned-stalker who follows a news cameraman across the country is neither charming nor endearing. Were there a murder or two, this could have made an awesome horror movie. Alas, no.

9. The Ugly Truth

When will somebody tell Katherine Heigl that she’s not a good actor, let alone a good star for romantic comedies. The only saving grace about this movie was Gerard Butler, which secured at least one ticket from our illustrious Executive Editor Neil Miller’s mother in the cinema. We’ve seen a lot of these scenes before, from orgasms in a restaurant to the tender-hearted misogynist. It was another rough and tumble crushing of the American romantic comedy.

8. Amelia

Here at FSR, we love Amelia Earhart. We think she was a fantastic pioneer for women in aviation and for the aviation industry in general. We also think that it was a shame that she was lost in her attempt to travel around the world. We just didn’t like this movie. It was pedantic, boring, lackluster and completely uninteresting. By the end of the film, it was a relief to see the plane go down… oops, spoiler alert.

7. My Sister’s Keeper

Between Jodi Picoult’s weepy source material and The Notebook auteur Nick Cassavetes, this emotionally manipulative film was just too much angst for us to handle. There was no sympathy for parents who genetically breed a new daughter to be an organ farm for their other daughter, who is dying from leukemia. There were some decent performances, but not from stars Cameron Diaz and Abigail Breslin. Sure, watch this movie if you want a good cry, and you can hate yourself afterwards.

6. Last House on the Left

Some resident horror mavens like Rob Hunter had a lot of love for this movie, and we can agree that the original dirty nasty is a classic in its own right. But the remake of this Wes Craven/Sean Cunningham thriller was completely unnecessary. From some pulled punches in the revenge kills to the unpleasant rape of Sara Paxton by TV-Terminator Garret Dillahunt, it left some of us wondering why they just don’t slaughter kittens on screen for a good shocker.

Click Here to See the Final Five >>

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  1. jessy says:

    can only see the first five but am hopeing that transformers 2 is on this list

  2. thisguy says:

    Transformers 2, Dragonball Evolution, and Paul Blart didn't make the cut? I'm surprised.

    Also after having seen it, Alvin the the Chipmunks the Squeakquel should be on here, it was so bad I'd be embarassed if anyone found out I saw it.

  3. Jordan Raup says:

    Thanks for reminding me to revisit Observe and Report! One of my favorites of the year.

  4. Neil Miller says:

    While I disagree with your top pick (that movie was awesome, it's your taste that is lacking), I will say that the rest of this list is solid… For something written by Kevin Carr. ;)

  5. KevinCarr says:

    I always get a warm feeling in my groin when you give me a compliment like that, Neil.

  6. Jeff R Hall says:

    Wow, 12 nominations for worst film of the year (Including the dishonorable mentions) without once discussing Wolverine, Transformers or Terminator. Only Kevin carr could come up with a list this bad. (Pun intended.)

  7. ladyofthelake says:

    I've only seen two of the films mentioned here, lucky me. I happened to like Last House on the Left, but I don't really know why. I also saw My Sister's Keeper and wanted not only to kill myself but others around me. That movie wass a waste, I lost brain cells.

  8. blazing6shooter says:

    Ugh, what is with you people and your hatred for Orphan. The build-up and suspense was spot-on, and all of the actors, especially the evil girl were very believable…and considering this came from the man that did wax house, it is a huge improvement. It definitely has a slot in my top 10 horror films of the decade. Oh, and for once, it's not a remake! it's fresh and the twist in the end is bat-shit crazy, so much so that it sent shivers down my spine, give this movie some credit!

  9. Torquefire says:

    Only seen #1. But Transformers 2 should be on the list. My son is 6 and a big Transformers fan, he got the DVD for Christmas and immediately asked if he could trade it for Monsters Vs Aliens…..I was so proud!

  10. Aleric says:

    I agree

  11. Aleric says:

    Another agreement here.

  12. Christopher_M says:

    I think those films were at least split down the middle…people either liked them or hated them…but a majority of the films on the list earned the spot because they're mind-numbing for all…

  13. Jeff R Hall says:

    I don't mean this to come off snarky and snide, but really? There are people liked these flicks? I cannot recall one postive comment towards any of them.

  14. couchkik says:

    WOLVERINE!!!!! It is and will be remembered as one of the 2009 worst movie! It looks for me that Steven Seagal wrote the dialogues.This “cheap TV movie” version of X men lacks of everything that made X-men movies great. Story is dumb with ridiculous twists, actors talk like red neck farmers, CGI in the Final is embarrassing and dated.
    And I'm really worried now with the bunch of X-men spin-offf movies coming up…

  15. knewit says:

    I miss transformers two!
    I don`t think any brain grossing higher than 67 on the iq scale is even going to see the third installment.
    better be stoned and call it the best flick in the world.
    MB has script issues. Erin? is that a chick? +having star treck writers fill in the missing parts was not exactly a great idea, lol.
    The animations were poor in tf2. When your all mighty devestator is made by lego blocks, some guys at the maya desk is having drawing problems. uggh.
    Transformers sell of the name, mostly, and Michael Bay gets to ruin the brand. Hasbro didn`t even notice, along with the studio-that MB took a guy of his freakin forum, and posted him in this film. How does these kids get elected doing film? I personally enjoyed “the rock”, even the Ferrari was a cheap fake one. What happened to Michael Bay? He even fooled the Oscars this year with one nomination. Hmm, does John August work for the Oscars now??? I think so.
    And thats why transformers too should be on this list. prompt.

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