WTF: The Most Boring Oscars EVER!

Posted by Kevin Carr (kevin@filmschoolrejects.com) on January 22, 2009

Last night, I got distracted from doing any real work (as well as my now-late WTF article) by the three-hour premiere of LOST, easily one of the best shows on television. My wife was at a LOST party with her friends from work, I was left home with the kids. So my sister came over, and we made some wicked-awesome food and watched the show ourselves.

My contribution for the night… homemade guacamole with freshly made tortilla chips. It was awesome.

However, when I woke up this morning, the guac had come back to haunt me, and I was cursed with massive flatulence. Rolling out of bed, I let a huge, volumous one rip.

And that became symbolic of this morning’s Oscar nominations.

Some might say that I’m being harsh, equating the Oscars to guacamole farts in the morning, but it is wildly appropriate today.

I skipped watching the press conference and checked the noms online to find no surprises whatsoever. When I pulled up the page, I literally pushed back from the computer and said…

What the Frost/Nixon?

I know that the Oscars are usually seeded with all the stuffy award-bait flicks. But usually there’s something to stir things up. Not this year, though.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button got the most nominations (13, to be exact), although I seriously doubt it will win anything more high profile than Best Cinematography, considering it really hasn’t taken home any significant awards yet this season. All the other news included the fact that Revolutionary Road just didn’t get as many as anyone else thought it would.

You might think it a bit hypocritical for me to trash these nominations considering that three films in my top ten best list of 2008 were in the top spots (i.e., Slumdog Millionaire, The Reader and Milk). But the Academy didn’t even do the traditional splitting votes between Best Picture and Best Director.

Even with a few minor dark horses in the mix (like a nod to In Bruges for screenwriting), there’s nothing to buzz about. At least last year, there was a nomination for Norbit. Couldn’t the Academy have given a Best Sound Editing nod to The Love Guru just to give us entertainment journalists something to talk about?

The only mainstream mentions in major categories include Heath Ledger from The Dark Knight for Best Supporting Actor (which is a surprise to no one), Robert Downey Jr. for Tropic Thunder (whose “thunder” was stolen with a Golden Globe nod) and WALL-E for Best Original Screenplay.

In fact, the only real surprises I think people will talk about is what wasn’t nominated, like Clint “Get Off My Lawn” Eastwood. I guess winning the first weekend’s box office with Gran Torino didn’t serve him well with the Academy voters.

I literally was almost falling asleep looking at the list. I can’t imagine how boring the ceremony’s going to be in a month. I’ll be sure to skip the guacamole on February 22.


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  • Kevin, so harsh, and yet... Ok, so they're not the biggest surprises, but when have the OScars NOT been boring? I really am PISSED that the Boss got snubbed, and I really, REALLY hoped that Nolan at least got the nod for TDK. Over Ron Howard. Yes, I said it. I am happy enough for the noms it got, though.
  • I think most of the talk this year is going to be about how low the rating can sink this year. 'The Dark Knight' still got eight noms, which should generate some interest, but not at the levels they were probably hoping for. 'Slumdog' will probably win, along with Danny Boyle. People will complain when 'The Dark Knight' loses to 'Benjamin Button' in the cinematography category.

    Basically, I'll be watching off my PVR and fast forwarding through to see the winners, waiting to see if anything interesting happens, but still managing to watch the entire ceremony in under 10 minutes.
  • There is really only one reason I will watch The Oscars, to see Heath Ledger win Best Supporting Actor. After that I will be on auto-pilot. That is, unless I am assigned to cover them. Ahem. Shame on you, Oscar, shame on you!
  • Joe G
    Dark Knight was a great movie, but it's hardly THE Best Pic of 2008. Most of you who just wants it probably did not watch the majority (if any) of other Oscar Best Pic contenders. I at least Slumdog Millionaire and I thoroughly believe that THAT movie is definitely THE Best Picture of 2008. Besides, even if Dark Knight was nominated, it would NEVER beat Slumdog Millionaire.
  • Look, I loved Slumdog. It instantly went onto my list of favorites. It's a poignant, fun movie with great characters. But is it the best of the year? I don't think so. There's a too-simple, too-straightforward quality that keeps it from resonating deeper and transcending.

    But out of the contenders - I feel like all the Best Pictures are lacking in some way. Lacking a soul or essence that defines them as above-all-others. I fear that's a trend that will continue as studios and filmmakers figure out the formula to making an Oscar Winner. Formula without heart.
  • Paul
    "Formula without heart. "

    Well said.
  • Boring, boring and oh yes BORING! This years picks are easy enough for a fifth grader. The show will go nicely with Mr. Jackman's (boring) British take on MC'ing.
  • He's Australian. PROBABLY why he was in Australia. Just sayin'...
  • Faux Pau, you are correct! But he's still very boring.
  • I dunno. Jury's out for me. He's a born entertainer: can dance, can sing, can be funny. Will he put it all together and deliver the goods--probably not. But I wouldn't necessarily call him boring.
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