Film School Rejects » Ten and Five

Inglourious Basterds: 10 Things I Liked, 5 Things I Didn’t

Brian C. Gibson — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 19:41:51 +0000

Editor’s Note: Warning, as with all of our ‘Ten and Five’ articles, this one does contain spoilers. Please be warned.

Inglourious Basterds has been a project talked about for almost a decade now, living only in the mind of Quentin Tarantino. Finally the film is almost here, and worth the wait. Take a minute though, and listen to a few warnings that come with this film. Just like many other QT films, this one has a lot of dialog. Fortunately though, his films are known to have some of the best dialog. So don’t expect a bunch of action, but this is QT’s most fun film to date. Also, there are a lot of Eli Roth haters…so if you hated him before, it will be tough to hate him after seeing Inglourious Basterds. Finally, one of the hottest talking points of this film has been Brad Pitt’s accent. Trust that there is a purpose for the overdone accent, and it plays like a character all by itself later in the film. What is there not to like about the prospect of a Tarantino directed World War 2 film? Well, I found a few things. But first…

10 Things I Liked

10. Cultural Profiling

You get to see some of this in the trailer, but the dialog in the film is hilarious. Brad Pitt profiles all of Germany with quips like, “why don’t you use your weiner-schnitzel licking finger” and “if you ever want to eat another sauerkraut sandwich again.” Priceless.

9. Badass Principals

Within the trailer, I’m sure you noticed a Nazi with a swastika carved into his forehead. This is actually one of my favorite ideals of the entire movie. Also, if you are going to shoot at Hitler, make sure it is done in the same way that QT would do it.

8. Subtitles

I really love the fact that QT went out and found talent from each respective country, and talent that could gracefully speak each language. Who would have ever thought, other than her German family, that Diane Kruger could be hot and speak fluent German? Some people are really annoyed by subtitles, and this might be one of those movies where you really lose notice of them.

7. Production and Costume Design

The production design and costumes on this film were incredible. The colors pop off of the screen, especially during the movie premiere. QT’s films usually have a high attention to detail and Basterds is no different.

6. The Score

If you pay close attention, the score changes very stylistically from chapter to chapter within the film. It was Spaghetti Western at a point, and harsh contemporary at other points. The score did a wonderful job at setting the right mode for each scene.

5. The Basterds

The Basterds themselves are a spectacle. It is a bit disheartening to see that they don’t have a ton of screen time. There are two amazing scenes that make you feel the Basterd’s mark on the film, but sadly there is just not enough of their ‘men on a mission’ moments.

4. Brad Pitt

To my immediate memory, Tarantino hasn’t directed an actor that carries the same clout as Brad Pitt. Warning, don’t try and debate that John Travolta, Bruce Willis or Samuel L. Jackson carry any more clout than Pitt in the film industry. Pitt is one of those actors that I have always theoretically wished to be under the direction of QT. Pitt was a bit experimental in his roles, especially early in his career with films like Fight Club, 12 Monkeys, Seven, Kalifornia, Cool World and even the Tarantino written True Romance (even though it was a very small part. I have been happy to see his experimental side coming back with Burn After Reading and now – Inglorious Basterds. One thing that I have already heard, is that his accent is too thick and even annoying. Trust in the fact that Pitt’s accent is almost like an entire separate character within the film. QT has a method to the mayhem, and this film’s mayhem is glorious.

3. Eli Roth is Badass

For those who don’t know, Eli Roth is better known as a director. He has directed films such as Cabin Fever, Hostel and Hostel 2. Roth gets a bit too much criticism from his films, and unfairly I might add. He directs his horror films with a bit of humor. Some people frown on his films and their humor, but I’m not here to talk about his directing. Stop hating, and experience all that is Donny “The Bear Jew” Donowitz. Roth put on quite a bit of muscle, and creates one of the more entertaining characters of the Tarantino ensemble. Donny carries a baseball bat, and kills Nazis with it. It’s quite fun to watch, and I say that in the least creepy way. Donny isn’t the only entertaining Basterd though, the trailer made it pretty clear that Brad Pitt will be one of the biggest draws of the film.

2. Tarantino is Back! Even though he was never gone…

Tarantino fans really do not need to be convinced to go see this film, but QT has received a bit of negative criticism over the past few years. There were not a lot of positive things said about Death Proof, even though I personally really enjoyed it. So for QT fans, start to get excited. The film never begs to be taken seriously, but expels its own tone of serious badass fun. Like most QT films there are some laughs, but there is also a bunch of blood and mayhem. Much of this mayhem comes from Eli Roth, known in the film as Donny Donowitz…also known as “The Bear Jew.” Like I said, time to get excited.

1. Italian Accents

Trust me, this will make sense when you see the film for yourself.

So after all of this praise, what is not to like?

5 Things I Didn’t

5. Alternate Universe

Spoilers Ahead. The film never actually tells you that it is not historically accurate, just never tells you that it is. There is no “based on” preface at the start of the film. You will find yourself forgiving these historical inaccuracies due to the fact that each detail within QT’s grasp is tight and cohesive.

4. Apathetic to Adolf

I didn’t know if it was supposed to be funny, or just supposed to be Adolf. I think it was supposed to be funny, but I didn’t laugh.

3. More Action Please

I promised I wouldn’t complain about too much dialog, so instead I will complain about not enough action. This is supposed to be World War 2 QT, give us some bloody war.

2. More Basterds Please

This also falls into the “More Action Please” category. The Basterds are awesome, and I would say they should have their own movie…but that is already kind of what is going on. When you see the movie though, you will find that the Basterds just play a part in the film, and not the film’s subject.

1. Subtitles

Did I mention that I can’t read?

Drag Me To Hell: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 09:12:31 +0000

Editor’s Note: As with many of our Ten and Five articles, this article does contain spoilers. This article may also attempt to be overly humorous, repeatedly rip out clumps of your hair, gum your face, and vomit in your mouth. Consider yourself warned.

They would have you believe that Sam Raimi is back. But did he ever leave? And if he did, has he really returned? In terms of his absence, someone who makes like a billion dollars with Spider-Man can’t really be said to be gone. Instead of whacking [It's "waxing" Robert] phallicsophal [Did you mean philosophical?] I could just cut the games and get to it – is the Sam Raimi of old, the Sam Raimi of Evil Dead back? Yes and no, but we’ll get to that. In short order, Drag Me To Hell is getting blowjobs, aka good reviews, from pretty much every critic on the face of the planet, most of whom apparently don’t remember Evil Dead or even know what a horror film is. That said, there were 10 things I liked and half as many I didn’t. Let’s do this.

10 Things I Liked

10. Justin Long and his iPhone

Some other sites may not like Just Long, but I think he’s funny. Not quite “Professor” material, but I like him. Plus, as the Apple guy, seeing the iPhone was a fun wink.

9. Sam Raimi’s Oldsmobile Delta

This “inside joke” is so far on the outside that if you didn’t know the old Gypsy’s car has been in every Sam Raimi film, then you have no standing to talk about this film. Heck, it was even in The Quick and the Dead, though it was hidden underneath some stuff.

8. Some of the Humor

I don’t mind some humor in my horror, it’s fun. There were plenty of silly things here that worked in an Evil Dead 2 kind of way.

7. The Sound

This was a very, very loud movie and that is fun.

6. Shadows

I liked the way the demon was shown through shadows and his goat-like design was cool.

5. Blood Spray

The scene where Christine’s nose starts gushing blood was a good example of silly, bloody gore laughs.

4. Here kitty, kitty

While you may be surprised what you’d do to escape the demon, I won’t be. Though I wouldn’t kill my own cat – I’d just go buy a lobster and sacrifice it. Then eat it.

3. Dead kid

You may remember my last rant about children always coming out alive – not this time! The film starts off right by sending a mostly innocent young child to hell, where he will burn for all eternity.

2. Alison Lohman

Not sexy hot, but very next door cute. I approve.

1. Talking Goat

The goat had the look of Evil Dead 2 and the foul mouth of Freddy Krueger. While, like the rest of the movie, it was very silly, I found this image stuck with me most.

5 Things I Didn’t

5. The Script

I had a lot of issues with the script, actually, some of which will be covered in their own points. But there were some parts that just didn’t flow seamlessly. One example – we see Christine can’t get the money to pay for the exorcism (or whatever) and then Clay reveals he already paid for it – but no one told him about it. Also, if Christine is lactose intolerant, how did 2 ice cream sundaes and a half-gallon of chocolate ice cream not give her absolutely bowel destroying amounts of diarrhea? Thirdly – there are no scares in the script, only forced jump scares through audio cues. This movie didn’t scare you, it just told you when to scream.

4. Utter Stupidity of the Characters

The helper during the seance is a complete and utter tool bag. First, why bring a machete to the table to kill a demon? I would pick a shotgun. Second, all he had to do was kill a damn goat but he got outsmarted by a demon goat. It was tied to a table! The only way to screw that up was to cut the goat loose and guess what? Yup. Second, if your entire immortal existence depended on getting rid of the button, would you not just double check to make sure you were getting rid of the button and not say, a coin or an empty envelope? I mean, seriously. Your immortal soul is on the line here.

3. Vomit

You can also add hair pulling and denture loss here, but come on, man. What the hell? The old woman manages to throw up on Christine like 4 or 5 times. We get it, Sam, you think its funny, I think its repetitive. Where was the horror, again?

2. The Ending

You can read this weeks boiling point, but basically this innocent girl does everything in her power and chooses to do the right things at the end and still goes to HELL for ETERNITY. Let’s be honest – the gypsy woman is a thieving bitch. She stole a whole tray of candies from the bank desk. She failed to pay her mortgage and had two extensions already. She claims all this economic hardship, but clearly her extended gypsy family has enough money to throw a big party after her death. And don’t we think she over reacted? I mean, losing a house and having to live with your close knit family versus going to HELL for ETERNITY. Christine didn’t even do the “wrong” thing by denying the extension. They were already kind to this woman twice over. She did the right thing by not passing the button off on some stranger.

1. The Three Stooges Go to Hell

Calling this movie a horror movie is like calling my shit a pile of sweet chocolate cake. Sure, my shit is in a pile, but that’s where the similarities end. This movie had like, a vague horror theme, but it was more Repossesed than The Exorcist. If this movie scared you, you’re a giant sissy and have never seen a scary movie in your life. If you think this is “good horror” you don’t understand what the word horror means. This was a fun slaspstick movie, but was more along the lines of Scary Movie 5 than Evil Dead. See, Sam Raimi hasn’t returned to his Evil Dead self. He may have returned to that level of writing – that is, with a few plot holes and a not necessarily impressive script, but he didn’t capture the same menace. Evil Dead was a horror movie. Evil Dead 2 was a horror movie with comedy elements that tied into the main characters psychosis which developed because of his experiences. Drag Me To Hell was a slap-stick comedy with a horror theme.

There it is. My thoughts on Drag Me To Hell. Honestly, I could have come up with another five dislikes, but overall I enjoyed the film and wanted to give it a mostly positive slant. The bashing can begin now as I’m one of apparently only two people not to think that the Holy Ghost ejaculated this film onto celluloid. The other nay sayer is fellow Reject and sometimes replacement Coroner Rob Hunter. The two site horror experts. The two boys on this site who loved the film, Neil and Cole, both wept open tears of terrified hysteria at My Little Pony and each sleeps with a night light. Though to be fair, they sleep in the same room, so it’s really only one night light. Take from that what you will.

Monsters vs Aliens: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 17:57:57 +0000

Now, I’m not a huge fan of CGI. I still stick to my guns over classics like 101 Dalmatians or Heavy Metal when it comes to quality animated films for families. What I do like, though, are monsters, Kiefer Sutherland, and tall women. With that in mind, I slipped on some sweet InTru 3D glasses and settled down for a little ride courtesy of Dreamworks Animation.

10 Things I Liked

10. Renee Zellwegger. I thought it was pretty awesome they got a name as big as Zellwegger to come in for what was basically 4 lines. Funny scene too.

9. Comedy Mixture. Plenty of jokes for adults here, but even more for the kids. Considering I have the mind of a 12 year old, I was laughing non-stop.

8. Stephen Colbert. Always funny and his coffee maker/world destroyer button set up was great.

7. Stupid Gallaxhar Clones. I loved how they came out half-baked and were so easily fooled.

6. Hugh Laurie. Why this man isn’t in more movies, I do not know.

5. Origin Stories. It was cool how everyone got a brief origin story reflecting their classic monster roots.

4. InTru 3D. Right now, easily the most comfortable glasses on the market.

3. Explosions. Speaking of action, the battle scene between the army and the robot was awesome. It made Independence Day look like 13 year old movie… heh. But seriously, the action looked amazing.

2. Seth Rogen. I’m on record probably 17 times about how I’m tired of this guy, but there is absolutely no doubt in my mind he was the perfect choice for the role of B.O.B. Utterly hilarious.

1. Would you like a gun? Yes I would. My favorite lines from the whole movie, really cracked me up. Loved it.

5 3 Things I Didn’t Like

5. What, no Werewolf? I guess we got Missing Link instead, but come on!

4. Lack of Spaceships. To fully channel the 50s era, there should have been dozens of little UFOs zipping around over major landmarks.

3. Robot Fight. Overall I dug the robot stuff, but the fight between the Monsters and the Robot lacked tension, but then again it’s not the main threat of the movie.

Well. I can’t really think of 2 other things I didn’t like. The movie is what it is – a good, fun flick for the whole family. I wasn’t crazy about Reese Witherspoon, but she won me over by the end so I wouldn’t feel right criticizing her. The cast was great, the plot was straight forward, the jokes were aces. Other than the lack of tension in the Robot Fight, the movie was pretty solid and I would just be a nitpicking a-hole if I sat around for 3 hours trying to figure out something else I didn’t like.

So if you’re looking for some light hearted popcorn fare or something you can take the kids to and enjoy as well, Monsters vs Aliens is an easy winner in those categories.

What did you think of Monsters vs Aliens?

I Love You, Man: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 14:53:37 +0000

While I’m not man enough to confess my love to another male, I can talk about I Love You, Man while still feeling secure in my sexuality. The Rudd-Segel buddy pic did alright over the weekend, coming second to the surprisingly alright Knowing. While I could do a 10 and 5 for the Nic Cage vehicle (I liked it) it would basically be me loving the Earth dying and all the religious allegory.

For I Love You, Man, there were a few more things that stuck out to me – and here they are. Warning: This article may contain mild spoilers.

10 Things I Liked

10. Paul Rudd. Rudd is the perfect non-threatening boyfriend type character. That said, he’s quickly becoming overexposed. He makes the “Liked” list this time.

9. Realistic Relationship. The relationship between Peter and Zooey was pretty realistic and they seemed like real people.

8. JK Simmons. He should probably have a small part in every movie.

7. Dude Lingo. Most of the time, they way they talked was entertaining and, unfortunately, relatable.

6. Andy Samberg. If only Hot Rod didn’t suck. Samberg is awesome and under-used in this, but his few moments are great.

5. Rashida Jones. Beautiful girl and her character is down to Earth.

4. Projectile Vomit. It really exists! Funniest scene in the movie.

3. Thomas Lennon. Yeah, so basically I really liked the cast.

2. Lou Ferrigno. How awesome is having The Hulk in your movie playing himself? His parts were great, especially when he choked out Segel.

1. Zooey is an Awesome Girlfriend. My favorite part of the movie is that, for once, the girlfriend character was awesome. She wasn’t having any sort of crisis, she wasn’t a slut, she wasn’t insane. She was just the perfect girlfriend. It was nice to see that kind of an understanding character.

5 Things I Didn’t Like

5. Lack of Samberg. Simply put, needs more Samberg.

4. Joe Lo Truglio. His character was annoying (but supposed to be) and his talent was wasted.

3. Predictable. Of course we know what’s going to happen, but at no point in the movie did I ever think for even a moment that things wouldn’t end exactly as they did. Zooey and Peter were like the perfect couple – their breakup was not believable in the slightest.

2. Repetitive. The ’sweet sweet hangin’ section of the movie was tired and repetitive and a bit too long.

1. Same Cast. I’ve been bitching about this for a long time and will keep bitching about it – I’m tired of seeing the same corral of actors in every movie. There are dozens of talented, working comedic actors, but it seems like all we get are the same few over and over. I love Paul Rudd, but come on, I’ve had enough. Jason Segel is funny and all, but I’ve had enough. Give me more Seann William Scott or Steve Carrell or, hell, bring back Pauly Shore. Just give me something different.

There you have it. I thought I Love You, Man was a pretty sweet, relaxed buddy flick. Nothing too deep, a couple of good laughs, though it got a little repetitive. I really, really liked Rashida Jones and her character.

What did you like and/or hate about I Love You, Man? Do you love me, man?

Punisher: War Zone: 10 Things I Didn’t Like, 5 I Did

Robert Fure — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 03:50:00 +0000

Editor’s Note: As with many of our Ten and Five articles, this article does contain spoilers. Consider yourself warned.

Lately you’ve probably noticed a great deal of activity amongst us Rejects involving the simultaneously anticipated and dreaded release of Punisher: War Zone. In the third attempt at bringing the ultimate bad-ass vigilante to the big screen, a third actor took up the assault rifle, joining the ranks of Dolph Lundgren and Thomas Jane. In this incarnation, Castle is in New York, an ex-Special Forces instructor, punishing those who have done evil in the world. His foes – the deformed Jigsaw and his insane brother, aptly named Looney Bin Jim. What follows is a bloody mess of carnage, but did it impress? From the title, you already know it didn’t.

Ten Things I Didn’t Like

10. Frank Castle, Gymnast. There is no doubt in my mind Frank Castle is a fine human specimen and an athlete. However, The Punisher is not known for running and sliding around on the ground or jumping 20 foot spans to crash through small, boarded up windows.

9. Fake Accents. Listen, the movie is supposed to take place in New York, but if you’ve hired a bunch of non-New Yorkers (and a bunch of Non-Americans, even), please don’t make them try to sound like they’re New York mobsters. They just end up sounding like piss poor cartoon characters.

8. Pittsy is a Pussy. In War Zone, Pittsy is just some old, fat henchmen. In the MAX comics, he is a salty mother who fights the Punisher very hard and takes an unbelievable amount of damage before finally being killed. From hard-ass to lard-ass.

7. Free Runners. Number one, I’m not sure why the Jamaican looking fella was Irish, but Free Running criminals is stupid, I hate it, I loathe it. It was basically in the film for one sight gag, which was worth a chuckle, but not in a good way.

6. Dominic West. This guy is awesome. Lexi Alexander should have pulled him back though, as right from his first appearance on screen he is so far over the top he turns into a caricature. He is to New York mobsters what Mario is to Italians.

5. Campy Humor. There is some humor in the Punisher books, notably the Marvel Knights series (starting with Welcome Back, Frank, which coincidentally inspired much of the 2004 film), but I felt that campy humor doesn’t work well when you’re killing 185 people brutally. Not only was it campy, it was flat out bad. Dash Mihok absolutely nailed Detective Soap, but that sad-sap-loser version of him has no place in a serious Punisher film.

4. Un-Punisher Like Moves. I’ve constantly stressed how the MAX line is the definitive book on The Punisher and that it is so well received because it is realistic. The Punisher would not slide around on the floor. He would not stand menacingly on the dining room table for 15 seconds with a flare. He would not jump onto a chandelier and spin around firing willy-nilly with two automatics. Leave that to Shoot ‘Em Up.

3. Looney Bin Jim. They made this guy up for the movie and he sucks. Terrible accent, over the top acting, and he knows like, crazy wall-flipping kung fu and has an extensive medical background or something.

2. Jigsaw’s Recruitment Drive. Seriously? First some gang-bangers are watching a projected image of the American flag (hoodlums are patriots!) and then Jigsaw delivers his Patton speech (as Editor Neil pointed out) and goes high-stepping around town. What the hell.

1. Uneven Tone. The movie was uneven to me. There was a lot of brutal, bloody violence right out of the pages of MAX and the subtle Punisher of Ray Stevenson. Good stuff. But then switch over to the over the top cheese-fest that is Jigsaw and the villains? For the love of all that is Holy, no thank you. The Punisher is a serious character. It is the hardcore version of Death Wish. A movie like this should have dark humor, not cheese ball moments. A movie about The Punisher should be dark and scary and horrible, for the most part.

Dishonorable Hatred: Micro. I was excited at first, but hearing a grown man called “Micro” seemed very 1980s (Gee, I wonder why?). If they were going to use Micro, I would have preferred seeing him survive this installment and then do his MAX storyline ending which was awesome.

Five Things I Liked

5. Brunette Julie Benz. Julie Benz is everywhere and she is hot all over. I like her with dark hair.

4. The Cinematography. I wasn’t sold on the neon look of the film from the trailers, but on screen the films color choices and tone looked good. It was dark and gritty and ugly, like Castle’s New York should be.

3. The Guns. The Punisher loves guns. He should have a lot of them and he does. I was happy to see an extensive armory. Castle also reloaded a lot, which is realistic, considering most handguns hold 15 or fewer rounds and his assault rifle likely held 30 rounds.

2. Comic References. This is good and bad. By having Pittsy in the movie, they give a shout out to the comic but ruin the character. Most of the other stuff was great though. Bradstreet hotel, after Punisher Cover Artist Tim Bradstreet, the line “Welcome Back” said to Frank, as in the “Welcome Back, Frank” storyline, and all the little nods like that were a nice touch.

1. The Violence. This is a pretty violent film with a good deal of blood and gore, which is exactly what a Punisher movie needs. That half of the film was great. I liked the violence. It was appropriate.

Honorable Like: Ray Stevenson. I wasn’t blown away by Ray and he might not even be my favorite Frank Castle, but if he is excited to continue the character and we can get a good, dark sequel with him starring, I would be very happy.

There it is. My 10 Dislikes and 5 Likes. Now, I’m being hard on this movie because I love The Punisher. I wanted something great. This movie gave me 50% appropriate action violence and 50% utter shit corn ball comedy. That I can not forgive, so it gets 10 dislikes. That isn’t to say I ‘hated’ the movie, that I definitely didn’t love it. I’m going to watch it again and will probably buy it on DVD. I just need Castle and his righteous journey. But this was a pretty weak movie, great for its level of violence, but utterly horrible due to dialog and the cheesy villains. Better luck next time (and I so want there to be a next time).

What did you think of Punisher: War Zone?

Quantum of Solace: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 19:41:56 +0000

Editor’s Note: As with many of our Ten and Five articles, this article does contain spoilers. Consider yourself warned.

While you can’t argue with a $70 million opening weekend, Quantum of Solace has been getting decidedly mixed reviews from many critics, with some loving the darker Bond and at least an equal number absolutely hating it. I thought it was far from perfect and wasn’t nearly as good as Casino Royale, but I that there was plenty to enjoy.

Ten Things I Liked

10. The Opening Credits. I liked the song alright after initially not being totally on board, but I thought after a slow start the opening credits were cool, mostly because they brought back the nude girl silhouettes.

9. The Future. The QUANTUM storyline has given us a wide variety of high level bad guys for Bond to take on, which can open the franchise up to realistic villains and realistic threats for Bond to whip the ass of.

8. Athleticism. Compared to other Bonds, this guy is a superstar athlete. Daniel Craig’s 007 could, without a doubt, whip the ass of any previous Bond and beat them in a foot race or jumping contest.

7. Oil Homage. Duplicating the famous death of Jill Masterson in Goldfinger was a nice touch.

6. Walther PPK. This small handgun had been absent from the last few films, but the traditional Bond sidearm is back in a big way this time around.

5. Motorcycle flip. When Bond twists the throttle and sends the rider flying it’s awesome and stylish.

4. Olga Kurylenko. She plays a cool character and is totally hot. Can’t understand why Bond didn’t kick game on her.

3. Ass Whooping. James Bond took the label of “blunt instrument” and ran a marathon with it, beating the crap out of a dozen or more people and coming off like a total badass, dangerous superspy.

2. Body Damage. While he may pull off some amazing feats, Bond isn’t invincible and takes his fair share of bumps, bruises, cuts, and dings.

1. Daniel Craig. Craig is a total badass and a great choice for Bond. I’m very glad he’s signed on for more films as he is a sure thing to be immortalized in at least the Top 2 Bonds of all time.

Five Things I Didn’t Like

5. Location Cards. I didn’t like how every time the film went to a new city there was a very large title card announcing the location. It felt out of place in a Bond film.

4. Not Enough Sex. I get that we’re slowly building Bond as a character, but we could totally do with more hot women exposing various amounts of skin.

3. Lack of Dialog. There was a ton of action in Quantum of Solace, which didn’t give Bond enough time to be Bond and lay out some clever Bondisms and express his wit.

2. Missing Bond Elements. The relaunched Bond at times seems as though its in danger of forgetting why we want to see the film in the first place – It’s James Bond. There are things that we don’t miss – silly gadgets and lame action sequences. But there are things we do miss – Bond saying his name, ordering martinis, sleeping around; things like that.

1. Marc Forster/Editing Decisions. There is no denying that Quantum of Solace borrowed a touch too much from the Bourne series of films. With shakey camera, fast editing, and lots of jumping, the blame must be laid on Forster, who probably wasn’t qualified to take this type of film on yet. It’s ironic, considering Bourne clearly borrowed from Bond, now we’ve come into some sort of nonsensical circle. Hopefully in the next installment, we shift away from the hyper-camera and settle it down. I’m all for a dark and serious Bond, but I don’t want to get a Bourne clone or lose those classic Bond moments.

So there you have it, my 10 Likes and 5 Dislikes of Quantum of Solace. Obviously there are a lot of opinions on this film and I want to hear yours. Clearly, I enjoyed this film but definitely offer up that it wasn’t as good as Casino Royale and may have been a touch disappointing. I’m excited for the future of the franchise, especially if they hear our complaints about QoS and make the necessary adjustments.

What did you like or dislike about Quantum of Solace?

Role Models: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 07:38:14 +0000

Editor’s Note: As with many of our Ten and Five articles, this article does contain spoilers. Consider yourself warned.

Role Models tasted the beast this weekend, over-caffeinated itself and drove its novelty pickup over the mascot of the box office. Ok, so maybe I oversold that considering it opened second with just under $20 million, but I had a lot of references I wanted to slip in. Anyway you slice it, I enjoyed the crap out of Role Models, perhaps because I saw just a little bit too much of myself in Wheeler, from my love of boobs to my love of boobs. Ok, so maybe I oversold how much I have in common with Wheeler, but I wanted to say boobs at least five times this article. Here’s what I liked and what I didn’t.

10 Things I Liked

10. Relatability. More and more movies are speaking to the 18-25 year old audience in their own voice and relating to them directly, rather than coming off as some 40 year old trying to talk like he was 25.

9. Sarcasm. Role Models doesn’t rely on feces or other bodily fluids to get the laughs, but rather opts for smarter comedy with plenty of sarcasm, wonderfully delivered by Paul Rudd.

8. Taste the Beast! In a previous draft, they were beer salesmen, but I liked the switch to energy drinks as well as the early caffeine related jokes.

7. LARPing. Live Action Role Playing is long over due to be mocked celebrated on screen.

6. Connie (Carly Craig). While she only has a few lines in the film, I thought this chick was very hot and had one of the best lines of the film: Out here, I’m just another woman lookin’ to cheat.

5. Run Time. Finally a comedy that comes in at under 2 hours long!

4. Bobb’e J. Thompson. As Seann William Scott said, this kid is younger and funnier than all of us.

3. Hatred. I love to hate and loved that Paul Rudd’s character Danny hated all the same things I do, like Starbucks and people who play the guitar.

2. Two-Person Jokes/Character Interaction. Seann William Scott and Paul Rudd make a great comedic team and I loved how a lot of the jokes involved either both of them or just more than one person in general, like the cocaine line.

1. Seann William Scott. Was there ever any doubt my ManCrush wouldn’t be number one? He’s hilarious as a lovable rogue who’s a scoundrel with a heart of gold. And he loves boobs.

5 Things I Didn’t Like

5. Not enough Elizabeth Banks. She’s hot and funny and could have had a few more scenes.

4. Lynette (Kerri Kenney). I just never really find Kerri Kenney funny, but that’s probably just me.

3. David Wain’s Cameo. I like David Wain and I like director cameos, but I thought his annoying guitar player cameo stretched the joke a few seconds long, which kind of made it annoying.

2. First Trailer. The first trailer didn’t even come close to doing the movie justice.

1. Inbreeding. Listen, I love the cast and I’ll see anything with Scott or Rudd, but is it just me or are there only like 10 working comedy actors these days? It seems no matter what movie I’m watching, I’m seeing the same faces in the lead roles and the same faces in the cameos. Like 60% of the cast has been in an Apatow related: Superbad and 40 Year Old Virgin being the two big ones.

So there you go. My dislikes were relatively minor and my likes were closer to loves. I really enjoyed Role Models and think you just might too. Boobs.

What did you like or dislike about Role Models?

Appaloosa: 10 Things I Liked, 5 I Didn’t

Robert Fure — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 08:00:10 +0000

Editor’s Note: As with many of our Ten and Five articles, this article does contain spoilers. You’ve been warned, partner.

While Westerns may be a rare thing in theaters these days, luckily we’ve had a few in the recent years that were good. Joining that list is the Ed Harris helmed Appaloosa, which co-stars Viggo Mortensen and captures the essence of the historical West while keeping true to the roots of the fictional world of stand up shoot outs and wise cracking, whiskey swillin’ Lawmen.

10 Things I Liked

10. End Credits – The end credit sequence was awesome, with beautiful high resolution photography serving as backdrops with some great music played over top – first Tom Petty, then Ed Harris himself crooning.

9. The Visuals – Ed Harris can direct, no doubt about it. The shots he selects in this film are great, channeling classic western inspiration from past greats while keeping it fresh.

8. Virgil & Everett – The relationship between these two characters rings true and illustrates a realistic friendship between two men in America’s frontier.

7. The Guns – I love firearms and Appaloosa brings a lot of good looking iron to the screen, from Colt Peacemakers to Winchester 1873 Rifles.

6. The Ensemble Cast – There are a lot of great people assembled for this film: Lance Henriksen, Viggo Mortensen, Ed Harris, and Jeremy Irons.

5. Brevity of Gun Fights – In sticking with some of the more realistic elements, gunfights in the old West often only last a few seconds. Even the gunfight at the O.K. Corral was under 40 seconds. This film portrays shoot outs accurately.

4. The Script – This isn’t the movie most were expecting – There were classic Western themes, which we want, but also there are large doses of wit and humor which were unexpected and welcome.

3. Acting – Almost across the board, everyone did a great job. Mortensen, Irons, and Harris are all in top form portraying their characters, though we don’t expect anything less.

2. The Score – This is a great, classic Western score, which I purchased immediately. It includes two songs sung by Ed Harris, both of which relate to the film and are very enjoyable.

1. The Details – There are a lot of little details that I took note of and enjoyed. A lot of attention was paid to the small things, from glassware to weapons. My favorite detail was the well worn leather recoil pad sewn into Everett’s coat jacket, which complements his impressive 10 8 gauge shotgun. Also, awesome period correct mustaches.

5 Things I Didn’t

5. Lack of Advertising – Where is the support for this film? I love it, yet have only seen a handful of advertisements. This film could have used a bigger push.

4. The Bumbling Town Elders – The guys who seemingly ran the town of Appaloosa were just a touch too comical at the times, like the Three Stooges. Really, not that big of a stumbling block though – and I do love James Gammon no matter what he’s doing on screen.

3. Multiple Endings – This has been going around a lot lately and Appaloosa fakes you out with one climax only to continue onwards. Though, what follows is good, so I’m nitpicking a little.

2. Continuity Errors – I did notice a continuity error or two – a glass refills itself and Viggo’s shotgun switches between being open and closed in some shots.

1. Renee Zellweger – When she’s first introduced, all I could think was “This is Renee Zellweger,” and it took me a little bit out of the film. She was also a tad annoying, but about halfway through the film I was on board. Still, I think perhaps there were better choices for the role.

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