Film School Rejects » List of Demands

10 Things We Demand From ‘Terminator 5′

Robert Fure — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:53:56 +0000

So Terminator Salvation has come and perhaps very soon will be gone. May is a hard month for repeat customers and next week’s release of Up may limit some Terminator action. That said, the Christian Bale/Sam Worthington vehicle managed to pull in more than $67 million and The Halcyon Corporation has already started the wheels turning on the sequel which may land as early as 2011. Despite how hard several of us Rejects have been on the film, we’re all for a sequel. We love us the Apocalypse and robotic assassins. But if they’re going to make this movie, they better make it right. Thus, we have compiled a list of demands that must be met to ensure success.

10. Take the Time to Do it Right. I think the time table is really what killed Salvation. The Writer’s Strike basically froze the script in a pile of shit. The Strike stopped the script while it was still about Marcus and only had 3 pages of John Connor in it. Christian Bale had just said if they write a bigger part for Connor, he’d take it. No one budged on the release date though, so time kept passing with no work being done. Then they were forced to make this movie fast. If a sequel should happen, they have to take the time to do it right. McG loves talking out of his ass about how Christopher Jonathan Nolan is on as a writer. Well, give him the time to write it. Don’t hand him some pile of shit script and hope he can add in the awesome. Stirring sugar into a pile of dog crap doesn’t make it edible. You already have a great franchise with a great fanbase and a great pair of actors ready – don’t rush the script, you asshats.

9. Forget The Matrix ever happened. Skynet is a vague mastermind computer. It is not a rip-off of ‘The Architect’ who is portrayed by Helena Bonham-Carter being all sassy. There shouldn’t be things like holograms and computer simulations and all that stark whiteness. The machines play dirty and they are dirty. We want androids and cyborgs and badass robots, not smarmy machines.

8. Time Travel is Optional. Some people complained this was the only movie that didn’t feature time travel. That’s okay. It took place in the future, which we wanted. Don’t rob us of our future war and insist on time travel in the next film. You can still do something original while you…

7. Stick to the Canon. There are somethings that shouldn’t change. Judgment Day happens. John Connor leads the resistance to victory. Anything else is bullshit. Don’t make it that John Connor leads the resistance to victory by fathering the child who actually leads the resistance to victory. Don’t make it so that his sacrifice is what does it. We’ve seen images of the future in the past, better films and John Connor defeating the machines by being a bad ass. That’s why you hired Christian Bale and machines are so scared of him.

6. Brad Fiedel’s Score. The music that accompanies the Terminator is classic and instantly recognizable. Would you make Jaws without the Jaws Theme? Fiedel’s score should be the starting point, not a reference. PS: Danny Elfman’s score of this latest installment was weaksauce.

5. McG is Optional. There was a lot of hesitation when McG was announced to direct, apparently with good reason. Terminator Salvation wasn’t very good. McG may be contractually bound to sit in the director’s chair again. If that’s so, fine. But if not, feel free to put someone in there to do the job better.

4. Deliver More Kyle Reese. Anton Yelchin did a great job despite not having a big enough role. Kyle Reese and John Connor are supposed to be pretty tight. Give Reese a bigger, more action-oriented part and keep Yelchin in the role.

3. Terminators. Lots and lots of Terminators. Salvation only delivered us a few T-650s. Most of the robots we saw were Hunter Killers. Meh. More cybernetic assassins. Show us what a war really looks like.

2. A Future War. Who among us does not want to see what Earth looks like in the year 2029? We’ve seen glimpses – hundreds of T-800s marching across Los Angeles. Hunter Killers floating above massive T-1 like tanks. Human skulls crushed underfoot as the resistance fighters themselves flee in armored pick-ups, firing laser cannons, and generally looking like awesome. Salvation was about 10 years too early to be that film. Rumors for the next sequel take even more steps backwards. This can not happen.

1. Make Christian Bale the Star. The Connors have always been the main focus of the franchise. Sarah Connor passed the torch to John and we’ve wanted a movie about awesome ass-kicking action since we first got a glimpse of it. Now they’ve cast Christian Bale as John Connor. Any further Terminator sequel that does not feature Christian Bale as John Connor as the leading role is a serious misstep. In Salvation Marcus Wright was too much the focus. McG said Sarah Connor might be the star of the next sequel. WRONG. Christian Bale as John Connor is it or you can go fuck yourself.

Those are our demands. If you expect the franchise to survive to Terminator Six, you had best meet them.

What are your demands of a fifth Terminator? Would you want to see one?

7 Things We Demand From an Avengers Movie

Dr. Cole Abaius — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 21:06:53 +0000

Normally, it would be pretty ridiculous to be excited about a film not due out until 2011. A film that doesn’t have a cast. A film that doesn’t even have a director. But after the incredible success of Iron Man, the reboot of The Incredible Hulk, and the promise of more interwoven superhero movies to come, Marvel plans on keeping us coming back to theaters like Captain America’s shield after braining half a dozen bad guys.

Luckily, since it’s still early on in the process, we’d like to publicly announce a few things we’d like to see included in Zak Penn’s script for The Avengers.

The Prologue

And there came a day, a day unlike any other, when Earth’s mightiest heroes and heroines found themselves united against a common threat. On that day, the Avengers were born — to fight the foes no single super hero could withstand! Through the years, their roster has prospered, changing many times, but their glory has never been denied! Heed the call, then — for now, the Avengers Assemble!

It’s probably the easiest thing to include, but just like the scrolling texts of a galaxy far, far away make it feel like Star Wars, the famous prologue would instantly set the tone of the film as pure Avengers. Set us up with each character in their own films and then let them Assemble!

The Hulk Quitting

We could hope for the Big Green Menace destroying an entire city block, but we’d settle for a set of railroad tracks. Either way, Bruce Banner needs to unite with the team only to realize the others are wary of him for good reason – further plunging him into solitude. It could set the stage for Hulk as the ultimate enemy and would definitely set the stage for Captain America to join the team and get honorary founding member status.

A Cameo by Quicksilver…and Magneto

It’s unlikely that Quicksilver would be the main villain or that he, Scarlet Witch or Hawkeye would be invited to join the team, but a cameo would be awesome. There are a ton of future members and villains that can’t be included – although we can hope that the ground would be set for future films. Plus, including Quicksilver in the story opens the door for a cameo by Ian McKellen as Magneto, his father.

Edwin Jarvis

Screw this computer crap. Jarvis should be a lot more than the computerized disembodied voice that Iron Man made him to be. He’s a Butler, a Badass, and as much a member of the team as Captain America. Edwin Jarvis brings his boxing expertise and father figure ways to the Avengers Mansion and has to be in the film. There is no Avengers without him. Plus, it affords the opportunity to have him thrown in the mix like when a major villain, let’s say Loki, infiltrates the compound and Jarvis confronts him.

Some Tough Female Heroes

For whatever reason, superhero films have yet to capitalize on the vast universe of female heroes out there, avoiding even major icons like the plague. The filmmakers behind The Avengers have their own vast universe, and they should embrace it. Wasp is a must-have, but it would be cool to see Scarlet Witch (see the Magneto cameo) or even Black Widow. Want to get even crazier? Get She-Hulk or Spider-Woman busting bad guys. The time-line might be a little tricky, but stranger things have happened.

Ant-Man Becoming Giant-Man Within the Film

Alright, we’d settle for Ant-Man not sucking. As much as we love The Avengers, we’re worried that Ant-Man might not transition to the big screen as well as he should. There’s a good chance that he may already become Giant-Man in his individual movie – or that they’re using the individual films to see which characters get the most screen time – but more than the others, Ant-Man has the potential to either be completely awesome or completely lame.

Nick Fury Being a Badass

Last, but not least, is the demand most likely to be taken seriously. Since Marvel has already cast Samuel L. Jackson as the eye-patched general (an obvious choice since the Ultimates version was based off him) they only have to do one more thing: put him on screen. Sam Jackson + Camera = Badass. Simple as that.

But it does cause a complication. There’s a few signs that point to the movie being tailored toward the Ultimates instead of the classic Avengers. Jackson as Fury, characters rooted more in reality and science than superpower. This could change some major things: Thor could be a lunatic instead of a God, they might be stationed at S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters instead of the Avengers Mansion (thus ruining hopes for Edwin Jarvis playing a decent role), Tony Stark might have a sex tape. Please, Marvel, don’t make a Tony Stark sex tape.

We’ve got high hopes for this film. Luckily, we have several other films to pave the way until 2011, and we’ll still have to see how Thor, Captain America, and Ant-Man turn out to see which direction Marvel is going. Most likely, it’s going to be the right direction, but these suggestions are a good start to making Avengers another blockbuster, fanboy satisfying flick.

Ten Things We Demand from Iron Man 2

Robert Fure — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 10:00:19 +0000

With the fantastic Iron Man film coming out on a rocking DVD set this past week, we’ve been thinking about our favorite hard drinking, big explosion-making hero and what we want out of a second installment. Now, Iron Man’s rogues gallery isn’t all that impressive, so we’re not doing some lame list of villains. Mostly, we just want them to do a bang up job like they did on the first, but if they’re open to suggestions, well then….

10. Alcoholism. In the comics, Stark battled hard with alcoholism. It may be a tad early in the hopefully long-running series for this, but drinking has always, and should always, be a part of Tony Stark. Besides, we really relate to this.

9. Armor Wars Tease. Armor Wars was kind of incorporated into the first one when Stark went about destroying his technology that had been used against innocents. In the books, Stark tracked down other powered suits and armor designs that used his stolen technology. I wouldn’t mind seeing some imitation Iron Men, or at least more of Stark tracking down his own weapons.

8. A Terrible Villain. Bear with me, I want a terrible villain, like Whiplash, to be handled without problem and humiliatingly defeated. No comic movie has really introduced a laughable villain and easily dispatched him right off the bat, which I think would be funny and give Stark some easy lines to score laughs.

7. Womanizing. There are some cut scenes on the DVD of Stark rolling deep with ladies, but his lady killer aspect should be kicked up a notch for the sequel.

6. SHIELD. While I prefer a regular continuity Marvel Nick Fury, I do want to see a little bit more of SHIELD, maybe some bad ass operatives or Stark working on designing a helicarrier.

5. In Continuity Cameo. We obviously need Stan Lee in the film, but we should also get a cameo from other Marvel characters in the universe, be it someone like Hugh Jackman just walking through the background or something more obvious, like an introduction to Steve Rogers.

4. Hydra or AIM. It would be cool to see a probable and realistic introduction to a Marvel terrorist group, like Hydra or AIM. It would have to be taken a little seriously, more so than in the comics, but giving Iron Man a group to take down is a good plan of action.

3. Modified Armor. It is probably asking too much for some Hulk Buster armor, though that would be freaking sweet. But it would be awesome to see Stark designing, and hopefully utilizing, some new armor designs.

2. The Mandarin. The “Ten Rings” in the first was an allusion to the rings The Mandarin wore in the comics, so it only makes sense that one of Iron Man’s only legitimately threatening villains make an appearance in the sequel. They should probably stay away from his more mystical qualities, though.

1. War Machine. We’re almost guaranteed this with Jim Rhodes saying “Next time” while staring at a suit of armor. But I demand some War Machine!

Honorable Mention: Iron Man destroying an entire armored column of enemy tanks just because that would be awesome!

So there you have it, ten things we want to see happen in Iron Man 2. But you know, if we don’t get them all, it’ll still be alright by me, as I’m betting my money that no matter what happens, it’s going to be awesome. But seriously, add some womanizing. And hot bikini chicks. I’m just being faithful to the comics!

What do you want to see in Iron Man 2?

Film School Rejects » List of Demands

10 Things We Demand From ‘Terminator 5′

Related Reading:

7 Things We Demand From an Avengers Movie

The Prologue

The Hulk Quitting

A Cameo by Quicksilver…and Magneto

Edwin Jarvis

Some Tough Female Heroes

Ant-Man Becoming Giant-Man Within the Film

Nick Fury Being a Badass

Related Reading:

Ten Things We Demand from Iron Man 2

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