Welcome back to This Week in DVD! Some great, good and sadly deficient releases await you including The Sunset Limited, Knuckle, season two of Rocko’s Modern Life, the second to last Twilight film and more!

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Project NIM

In the early 1970s a douchey professor at Columbia University set out on an experiment involving cross species communication by taking a young chimpanzee from its mother shortly after birth and placing it with a human family to be raised as one of their children. This documentary from director James Marsh is ostensibly about that chimp named Nim, but the people who pass in and out of his life are just as much the subjects here. Their motivations, actions and attitudes offer a smorgasbord of typical human behaviors that none of us should be proud of regardless of where you land on the issue of animal ethics, and the result is an oddly fascinating glimpse at the human psyche as interpreted by our closest living relative.

Rocko’s Modern Life: Season Two

Pitch: “I’m nauseous. I’m nauseous…”

Why Buy? Rocko is a wallaby with a handful of friends, a loyal dog and a proclivity for wacky adventures. This mid-nineties series from Nickelodeon’s heyday is a mix of crude and stylish animation that brings to life some truly hilarious and witty dialogue and happenings. This is one of those rare kids shows that offers just as much laughter and joy for adults, and it should come as no surprise that two of the main writers went on to create the equally awesome Phineas and Ferb for Disney. And am I the only one who thinks of Shout! Factory as the Criterion Collection for people who like fun? They continue to impress with their ability to pluck otherwise unavailable classics from the past and return them to life on DVD.

The Sunset Limited

Pitch: “Who would want this nightmare but for fear of the next…”

Why Buy? Samuel L Jackson and Tommy Lee Jones give brilliantly nuanced and heartfelt performances in what is essentially one ninety-minute conversation (and battle of wills) about whether or not life is something worth living. It’s been a while since I’ve truly enjoyed either actor in a movie, but this adaptation of Cormac McCarthy’s play has renewed both of them in my eyes. No matter your opinion on faith, god, humanity and mankind the final result will leave you thinking, wondering and admiring these two actors at the top of their game. And thanks to dialogue snippets like “the lingering scent of divinity” it may also be my favorite of McCarthy’s works too.

3

Pitch: “Who ordered the German threesome?” – overheard during Cole Abaius’ trip to Berlinale…

Why Rent? A couple find themselves in the doldrums of their relationship and both begin affairs, but unbeknownst to anyone involved both of them are sleeping with the same man. Tom Tykwer’s latest film is an interesting, humorous, and often sad drama about love lost and found, life and death, and what it means to be whole both inside and out. The topic and presentation are both of a very adult nature as the sex is frequent and fairly explicit, but the core lessons here are universal in regard to how we relate to each other. The second act has a bit of a slowdown, but the film overall is a refreshing and engaging look at modern love.

5 Star Day

Pitch: “Convincing chemistry between its attractive leads and fine thesping” – Variety…

Why Rent? A college student (Cam Gigandet) loses his job, girlfriend and apartment on his birthday and decides to test the theory of astrology by finding and interviewing the three people born at the exact same time and place as he was. Life lessons galore ensue! This really should have been a terrible movie. That plot, the lead actor and that terrible DVD cover art made me predict that all signs pointed to crap. And yet, the story surprises by never quite going where you expect. And Gigandet doesn’t necessarily display “fine thesping” but he’s surprisingly charming and subdued.

Knuckle

Pitch: Makes up for TLC’s obnoxious My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding show…

Why Rent? Ian Palmer didn’t plan on spending more than a decade documenting the ongoing feud between two rival families of Irish “travelers” but that’s exactly what ended up happening. This documentary follows various family members through the years as the meet, brawl and move on to nurse their wounds and pride. Or in some cases ice their bloody and raw knuckles. These aren’t the kind of people you really find yourself drawn to, but they’re an engaging and charismatic lot all the same. What drives real people to basically become living, breathing Hatfield & McCoys? Not even they know apparently.

The Phantom of the Opera At the Royal Albert Hall

Pitch: Anyone else remember Phantom of the Mall? No? Just me? Okay, moving on…

Why Rent? Andrew Lloyd Webber’s most famous (arguably) stage production received a special 25th anniversary presentation at London’s Royal Albert Hall, but in honor of the occasion producer Cameron Mackintosh made a few tweaks. I’m not a big musical fan, but this is easily one of my three favorites (along with Wicked and Les Miserables), and while watching a disc cannot really compare to the live experience this is still a sumptuously beautiful production. Crank the volume up andyou can’t help but get swept into the emotion of the story and songs. Yes, I’m serious.

The Rebound

Pitch: It’s Michael Douglas’ wife and the fourth guy from The Hangover movies! You should give it a chance anyway…

Why Rent? A middle aged woman (Catherine Zeta-Jones) leaves her cheating husband and moves to the big city where she discovers self worth and a nice guy almost half her age (Justin Bartha). As middling romantic comedies go this one is not too shabby. Glowing endorsement! Zeta-Jones and Bartha do good, relaxed work here and manage solid charisma and chemistry. They both manage to earn some laughs too with their delivery of writer/director Bart FreundLich’s script. Recommended for fans of either actor or the thrill of decent direct to DVD releases.

Yakuza Weapon

Pitch: The most powerful and visually appealing weapon in the movie is a very sexy, naked and comatose Japanese woman…

Why Rent? The son of a Yakuza boss returns home to claim his seat at the head of the crime family, but not everyone welcomes him back. From my full review: “It’s not quite interested enough to seriously dissect the manly action hero dynamic, but it pokes more than a few jabs at it including the ex-girlfriend character, Nayoko, who throws a boat at him out of feminine rage. Yes, a boat. She’s the only one able to beat his ass, which makes it a romantic gesture when Shozo has to save her from the bad guy who kidnaps her, dresses her up like schoolgirl, and then threatens her with a motorized dildo. So if nothing else I’ve described has quite sold you on the movie…”

Stormhouse

Pitch: More of a light sprinkle really…

Why Avoid? A female ghost mumblerer heads to a military base to study the supernatural entity they have incarcerated there. Surprise! It gets out. The idea here is pretty sound, but the execution is frustratingly bad. I realize there’s a global recession going on, but if you’re going to maintain a base containing a dangerous creature you might want to turn on some goddamn lights. Not only is the incessant darkness dangerous to your soldiers, but it’s also a bland and annoying watch for viewers. Of course, the creature effects consisting of lights and sound effects don’t help either. Not scary, not interesting, and not worth your time. Skip it and watch Storm Warning instead.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1

Pitch: Cruel of me to tease you with this I know. It doesn’t actually release until Friday night at midnight…

Why Avoid? The penultimate film in the Twilight Saga sees the pale Edward (Robert Pattinson) and the weak-willed Bella (Kristen Stewart) wed, screw and welcome their toothy spawn into the world. There’s also a puppy dog following them around. It may be difficult to tell, but I’m no fan of the Twilight series. Even if it wasn’t insulting to girls, which it is at every opportunity, the story alternates between two modes… boring and stupid. The teen angst is overly melodramatic, the lessons and morality are ignorant, and the action is dull. And good god how does a billion dollar franchise end up with such amateur-looking CGI effects? Skip it and watch Breaking Away instead.

A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas

Pitch: It’s a sad state of affairs when not even a shower scene with hot, naked nuns can make a movie worth recommending…

Why Avoid? The third (and probably final) film in the Harold & Kumar franchise sees the two best friends as virtual strangers. Harold has grown up and become an adult while Kumar is still an immature and unfunny asshole. Then stuff happens and they reunite. I’m a fan of the first two movies, but aside from the nude nun-filled shower scene and Neil Patrick Harris this one is mostly a laugh and thrill free dud. Sadly, even Harris’ “character” jumps the shark in a scene where attempts to sexually assault a woman in a fairly rough manner. It crosses a line from funny to simply crude, and that pretty much sums up the film as a whole. Skip it and watch one of the first two instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show and review material was unavailable:

Anonymous
Fireflies In the Garden
Machete Joe
Poolboy: Drowning Out the Fury
The Reunion
Supershark

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

Welcome back to This Week In DVD! Another week another ton of DVDs hitting shelves both real and virtual, and while there are several worth renting and avoiding there are only two worth buying. One is visible immediately below, and the other? One of last year’s best films.

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Perfect Sense (UK)

A chef (Ewan McGregor) and an epidemiologist (Eva Green) meet and fall in love just as a strange new disease begins to spread worldwide. People are struck with a strong emotional response immediately followed by the loss of one of their senses. It’s like Contagion but with heart and personality. This is a beautiful film about life, love and what it means to be human. It’s a must-see about mankind’s resilience in the face of loss and devastation. Just be sure to watch it before your vision goes. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Drive

Pitch: Don’t ever tell Albert Brooks to sit on his jacket…

Why Buy? A Hollywood stunt driver (Ryan Gosling) moonlights as a getaway driver, partly for the cash and partly for the thrill, but when he gets too close to another man’s woman (Carey Mulligan) the road ahead gets far bumpier than he could have imagined. The plot is pretty straight forward, and most of the broader beats are easy to see coming in advance, but director Nicolas Winding Refn tells his tale with such style and skill that it becomes a mesmerizing exercise in awesome. The cinematography, score and attitude combine to evoke a cooler eighties than the one that really existed.

Chalet Girl

Pitch: “It’s not what you got, it’s where you put it in…”

Why Rent? Kim (Felicity Jones) used to be a hotshot skateboarder headed for stardom, but a car accident took away her motivation and her mother. She gets a job as a chalet girl watching over a wealthy family’s mountain retreat and soon discovers a new strength within in the shape of a snowboard. She also hot tubs in the buff. This British import is a sweet and affable comedy that relies on quite a few cliches but still manages to charm thanks in large part to Jones’ performance. Plus, snowboarding!

Frontline: A Perfect Terrorist

Pitch: I’d listen to Will Lyman narrate paint drying…

Why Rent? The 2008 terrorist attack on Mumbai was an organized and well planned assault, and while the world watched it unfold on live television no one could have suspected that one of the key men behind the plot was a US citizen. This Frontline/ProPublica special looks at the life and times of David Headley who at various points in his life worked as a drug dealer, a US informant and an invaluable aid to Muslim terrorists. It’s a shocking but fascinating exploration of one man’s evil deeds and a government’s unknowing complicity.

The Mill & the Cross

Pitch: I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. Hobos with shotguns. Paintings that come to life…

Why Rent? Pieter Bruegel’s (Rutger Hauer) famous painting, “The Way to Calvary”, comes to life in this at times whimsical and at times dry exploration of how art is created. The subject is the crucifixion of Christ relocated to the 16th century, and it shows a field and hillside populated with all sorts of people going about their business. Hauer wanders throughout the image capturing it with his eyes, soul and mind before re-imagining it onto canvas. Rarely has a film moved as slow as this, but if you appreciate art and creative visual styles in film then give it a shot.

The Other F Word

Pitch: “The cool thing about what I do for a living is that the expectation of me as a father is so fucking low…”

Why Rent? Punk is more than a music or a dress code, it’s an attitude. But what happens when those who’ve spent their lives raging against the establishment join it for the sake of their children? This documentary follows a handful of punk music’s front-men including Jim Lindberg (Pennywise), Mark Hoppus (Blink-182) and more as they navigate between the attitudes that fuels their music and their role as fathers. It should come as no surprise that a good dad is a good dad, regardless of their occupation, and seeing these guys with their kids is a sweet, endearing and often hilarious experience.

Texas Killing Fields

Pitch: It’s like an American remake of Memories of Murder. So yeah, it’s no where as good as Memories of Murder…

Why Rent? Two detectives (Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Sam Worthington) with differing attitudes towards life and the job work together to catch a serial killer who leaves his violated victims to rot in a nearby marsh shrouded in fog and mystery. Jessica Chastain and Chloe Moretz are also on hand as another detective and a young local girl (respectively) who catches the killer’s eye. Michael Mann’s daughter, Ami Canaan has crafted a moody and evocative thriller filled with atmosphere and dread. Some slow spots and questionable events weigh it down, but it’s still a film worth seeing for fans of the dark and gritty.

The Thing (2011)

Pitch: No, not that thing. The other thing…

Why Rent? A research camp in Antarctica discovers a space ship and its pilot frozen in the ice, but when they foolishly attempt to defrost it all hell breaks loose. Yes, this is a remake of John Carpenter’s classic and far, far better film from 1982, but if you can push that knowledge aside long enough to watch the movie you’ll see that it isn’t nearly as bad as people would have you believe. Director Matthijs van Heijningen Jr’s film is a competent monster movie, and aside from relying way too much on CGI it manages to entertain just fine on its own. But seriously, don’t try comparing it to the original.

The Big Year

Pitch: Ever notice that Steve Martin more often than not plays wealthy men? It’s true…

Why Avoid? Three disparate individuals (Steve Martin, Owen Wilson, Jack Black) vie for one of the stupidest honors known to man as they each try to see the most species of birds in a twelve month period. Through the year long process they learn truths about themselves, find new friendships and watch as the fat guy inexplicably gets the hot, smart girl (Rashida Jones). This is based on a true story. People do this. Skip it and watch The Birds instead.

Dead Hooker In a Trunk

Pitch: This is why getting a Carfax report is so important…

Why Avoid? Two identical but completely different twin sisters, a short rocker chick and a cliched Christian guy take a ride in a car, but when they discover a deceased prostitute in the boot of the car their simple joyride turns very complicated. Real life twins Jen and Sylvia Soska wrote, directed and star in this low budget grindhouse effort, and the result is unfortunate. The script has issues but offers up some funny lines, and had the sisters passed it to a more accomplished cast and crew the movie would probably have been entertaining. As it stands though the entire thing screams amateurish, and that’s even before you factor in the bad CGI work. Skip it and watch Hobo With a Shotgun instead.

The Double

Pitch: If I knew anything about sports I’d engage in some basketball wordplay right about now…

Why Avoid? A senator is murdered, and when a young FBI agent (Topher Grace) suspects it to be the work of a Soviet assassin long thought dead he calls in the help of the ex-CIA agent (Richard Gere) who spent years trying to catch him. The setup is fairly rote, but the movie earns a couple points for a script that twists conventions well beyond the expected. Unfortunately it keeps on twisting all the way to stupidly unbelievable. Fans of the actors may want to check it out, but if you like your thrillers to at least pretend to be smart I wouldn’t recommend it. Skip it and watch Double Indemnity instead.

In Time

Pitch: The box is Amanda Seyfried…

Why Avoid? An unknown future event cause old adages to come true and mankind now trades time as money. Everyone has a clock embedded in their arm that counts down to the moment of death, and the wealthy hoard minutes, days and years just as they do cash and happiness today. One beautiful young man (Justin Timberlake) stands up to the system with Amanda Seyfried by his side. Writer/director Andrew Niccol starts with an intriguing concept (liberally cribbed from Harlan Ellison) but turns it into a stupidly generic waste of time. Skip it and watch Timer instead.

Spiderhole

Pitch: Definitely an exit only kind of hole…

Why Avoid? A group of friends decide to go squatting in an empty apartment, but they learn too late that trespassing is punishable by death! From my full review: “Spiderhole had promise, theoretically, but it fails to generate much in the way of suspense or scares. Shots of dusty pipes, slime dripping from faucets, and spiders crawling about are no substitute for real atmosphere, character development, and emotional investment.” Skip it and watch Arachnophobia instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Blubberella
Dream House
Outrage: Way Of the Yakuza,

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

Welcome to This Week in DVD! Lots of titles hitting shelves today, and we’re covering nineteen of them below. High profiles like Real Steel and Paranormal Activity 3 are releasing alongside indies like The Woman and Beware the Gonzo. There’s also several older titles worth checking out including Punishment Park, The Arena with Pam Grier and a Criterion release of Godzilla.

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

The Whistleblower

A female cop (Rachel Weisz) from the Midwest takes a temporary but high paid job as a UN peacekeeper in Bosnia and discovers despicable crimes and criminals in her midst. Her instinct as a cop is to help people and bring the guilty to justice, but the systematic corruption may be too widespread and unbeatable. Weisz gives a strong and emotional performance, and the film pulls no punches in its exploration of the sex trafficking trade that exists in Bosnia (and around the world). It manages to be both powerful and suspenseful too while never feeling the need to glamorize or Hollywood-ize the story. This isn’t the sexiest release of the week and there are some better films below, but it’s an important and well made movie with a message worth sharing.

50/50

Pitch: And you thought there would never be a funnier movie about cancer than Terms Of Endearment…

Why Buy? A young man named Adam (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is diagnosed with a rare form of cancer and given a one in two chance of survival. Let the comedy begin! Director Jonathan Levine’s funny and affecting film features a stellar cast including Anna Kendrick in her most well rounded role yet, Seth Rogen as the far less than annoying best friend, Matt Frewer as a pot-loving cancer patient and more. Screenwriter Will Reiser based the premise on his own experience and battle with cancer, and the result is a movie that never shies away from the effects on Adam and his family/friends but also never gives up on the notion that laughter, humor and a positive attitude are amazing medicines.

Godzilla (Criterion)

Pitch: He’s so badass he taught his preteen son how to blow smoke rings…

Why Buy? This Japanese production is the granddaddy of cautionary monster tales, and while there were creature features before him there’s never been one as scaly. Unless you count the dozens of sequels, remakes and ripoffs. The film follows the exploits of a giant bipedal reptile awakened by nuclear testing who descends on Japan with a vengeance while mankind tries in vain to fight back with all kinds of model tanks, rockets and jets on wires. It remains a classic of the genre, a fact that Criterion has cemented by releasing it under their banner. Their disc includes a new transfer, new interviews with cast and crew members, two commentaries and more.

Punishment Park (UK)

Pitch: The Hippie Games…

Why Buy? This pseudo documentary sees a British film crew visit the United States to examine the government’s treatment of radicals, flag burners and draft dodgers. It alternates between a group of young men and women who’ve chosen three days in Punishment Park over a multi-year jail sentence and another group enduring the “trial” that seems predetermined to find them guilty. Writer/director Peter Watkins’ 1971 film offers up an alternate reality response to the protests and violence of late sixties America, and in the process he created a film that stands just as shocking and prescient now as it did forty years ago. What exactly separates a patriot from a threat to national security? **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Sherlock: Complete Series Two (UK)

Pitch: You could say that buying this set is abecedarian. You shouldn’t of course, but you could…

Why Buy? Haven’t seen this set yet, but my region-free Bluray is currently making its way across the ocean via submarine and should be in my player any day now. Series One set a very high bar, and by all accounts the show-runners behind the scenes including Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss have delivered yet again. Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) and Dr. Watson (Martin Freeman) return for three feature-length episodes adapting the classic stories A Scandal in Belgravia, The Hound Of the Baskervilles and The Reichenbach Falls. The character of Holmes is a big enough creation that he can happily exist through the darkly horrific Murder By Decree, the very funny Without A Clue and the blockbuster antics of Guy Ritchie’s films, but modern day audiences are missing out if they’re not also enjoying this brilliantly executed series. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Beware the Gonzo

Pitch: We need to talk about Gonzo…

Why Rent? Eddie ‘Gonzo’ Gilman (Ezra Miller) is a high school rebel with journalism and justice on his mind, but when he starts up his own school paper to combat the cool kids he ends up way over his radically coiffed head. This is basically a nerds vs the world movie, and it works in a lightweight and mildly entertaining way. Miller is joined by a few recognizable faces including Zoe Kravitz, Amy Sedaris and Campbell Scott (who should really be in more goddamn movies). The movie makes a misstep in its attitude toward one character’s date rape experience, but that aside it’s good, forgettable fun.

Happy Happy

Pitch: I think at least one of those happys is meant to be ironic…

Why Rent? Kaja leads an unhappy life with a distant husband and a prickish son, but when a new couple and their adopted son move in next door her life takes some decidedly unexpected turns. While the four adults engage in relationship drama the two preteen boys develop an odd back and forth of their own involving a slave and his owner. It’s a mix of black comedy and real emotional suffering and may not be to everyone’s taste, but if you enjoy strong acting, interesting characters and interludes featuring a four man barbershop quartet singing in English then give it a chance.

Hell and Back Again

Pitch: You’ll never look at Wal-Mart greeters the same way again…

Why Rent? Like many other young men and women, US Marine Sergeant Nathan Harris returned from his tour of duty in Afghanistan a broken and damaged survivor. This often quiet and occasionally jarring documentary offers a visceral and intimate look into one soldier’s life. The filmmakers were embedded with Harris’ unit and they capture some intense firefights alongside the more humdrum side of daily patrols, but as the movie moves between the war and Harris’ efforts to settle in back home his true suffering comes clear. He zones out, gets angry over small things, has nightmares and grows overly attached to two handguns. The scene that flashes between combat footage and Harris playing a first-person war shooter is a bit obvious and on the nose but it’s still some very telling commentary.

Lethal Ladies Collection 2 – The Arena, Cover Girl Models, Fly Me

Pitch: “I want to hear your ass bumping good and hard on the floor…”

Why Rent? Roger Corman and Shout! Factory strike again with this trio of exploitation flicks with naked ladies kicking ass, posing for photos and serving drinks. The Arena is a flesh and violence-filled romp that sees Pam Grier and some white chicks enslaved by the Roman Empire and forced to fight as gladiators. Cover Girl Models finds a group of models caught up in espionage and kung fu in Hong Kong, and yes, they do get naked along the way. And finally, Fly Me sees kung fu terrorists foiled by sexy stewardesses. It’s almost not at all like United 93.

Paranormal Activity 3

Pitch: You sheet in my bed I keel you…

Why Rent? The ghostly box office behemoth continues with a second sequel that moves the story back a couple decades in the form of a prequel. The two sisters whose adult lives have been turned upside down in parts one and two are seen here as young girls, and we’re shown the story behind the origin of their family’s haunted curse. Like its predecessors this found footage film relies on a handful of spooky as hell scenes set amidst a lot of bland exposition and chit chat. The answers, explanation and ending may not suit every taste, but it deserves credit for offering a bit more than the first two. And seriously, the sheet in the kitchen scene? Crazy creepy.

Punished

Pitch: Only a fool would kill Anthony Wong’s daughter and expect to get away with it…

Why Rent? A business tycoon’s (Anthony Wong) bitchy daughter is kidnapped for an enormous ransom, but when the bad guys leave her for dead after getting their payoff the businessman decides to get his hands dirty. This Hong Kong flick is produced (but not directed) by Johnny To and it lacks his signature visual style, but it still manages to engage through plotting, structure and character. It’s Wong’s right-hand man who does the heavy lifting while his boss stews in anger and sadness, and the dynamic is an interesting one. Also interesting? The DVD cover’s double reference to Mel Gibson films! “First the ransom. Then the payback.” Indeed.

Real Steel

Pitch: More emotionally satisfying than The Fighter? Yeah, I said it…

Why Rent? A down on his luck robot-boxing manager (Hugh Jackman) takes his estranged son on the road with him as they try to find success with a new bot named Atom. Director Shawn Levy injects the movie with a lot of shmaltz, no doubt about it, but he also makes room for entertaining fight action and real heart. Oh, and several shots featuring Evangeline Lilly’s deliriously sexy shoulders. The effects used to bring the robots to life are top notch, the kid transcends his early annoyance factor to become mildly appealing and Jackman proves once again that Dr. Cox’s hatred of the man is unfounded.

Revenge of the Electric Car

Pitch: “It would be a good time for a little humility…”

Why Rent? The makers of Who Killed the Electric Car? return to explore the resurgence of electric and hybrid vehicles in the US and abroad with the Toyota Prius, Nissan Leaf, Chevy Volt and more. Tim Robbins narrates, and while we all know the overall story it’s the smaller character studies that truly engage. Tesla founder Elon Musk, GM’s VP Bob Lutz and Greg “Gadget” Abbott are fascinating characters and offer real insight into the motivations and personalities needed for this revolution to succeed. The film ends on a high note, but consumers are a fickle breed and all it will take is a major drop in gas prices for people to fall back into their own ways.

Shut Up Little Man!: An Audio Misadventure

Pitch: The profanity here gives Casino a run for its money…

Why Rent? Two college grads come to San Francisco in 1987 and discover their neighbors are a couple of loud, abusive and occasionally hilarious older men. They record the verbal battles, share them with friends and years later discover the recordings have become a viral sensation eventually becoming comic books, recreations and even a play. This documentary starts as a simple look at some humorous recordings but quickly becomes a fascinating exploration of friendship, curiosity and even avarice.

Today’s Special

Pitch: I enjoy eating Indian food. I just don’t like looking at it…

Why Rent? A sous chef (Aasif Mandvi) in NYC thinks he’s in line for a chef position, but when he’s passed over he quits in frustration and plans a trip to Paris. Those plans are interrupted though when his father falls ill and he’s forced to take over the family’s rundown Indian restaurant. Mandvi does a fine job with his first lead role and maintains a good balance between the comedic persona he’s known for and a more dramatic sensibility. Jess Weixler injects some white into the otherwise ethnic proceedings, but the entire ensemble works well together to tell an American tale with real flavor.

Two-Lane Blacktop (UK) (Blu-ray)

Pitch: Features the only lead performances from James Taylor and Brian Wilson. You’ll understand why once you’ve watched it…

Why Rent? Two young men (James Taylor, Brian Wilson) driving without a destination cross paths with a free-spirited young woman (Laurie Bird) and a thirty-something guy (Warren Oates) undergoing a midlife crisis. Their universal aimlessness stands in for the country’s own uncertainty just as their attempt at a singular focus (racing) serves as a much needed distraction. I poke fun at Taylor and Wilson’s performances because they’re clearly not actors, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exhibit a certain degree of charisma. It’s a dated piece of cinema and a fascinating time capsule of the people, cars and attitudes of our past. **NOTE – This is a region B Blu-ray which requires a region-free player.**

The Confession

Pitch: Kiefer Sutherland stopped saving the world one day a year so he could do this? For shame…

Why Avoid? A hitman (Kiefer Sutherland) enters a confessional booth and begins sharing his sins with a priest (John Hurt), but soon his real plans are revealed… and they just may be exactly what you expected. This film originated as a webisode series online, and as such the budget and scope are pretty limited. Most of the movie is spent in the confessional with the two leads, and while they both give fine performances the story is too obvious and uninteresting to really maintain viewers’ interest.

Essential Killing

Pitch: It’s basically the opening to a cool action movie but stretched to 85 minutes…

Why Avoid? A Taliban fighter (Vincent Gallo) is captured in Afghanistan, tortured and moved to an undisclosed location, but an accident en route leads to his escape and run for his life. Director/co-writer Jerzy Skolimowski executes some solid action sequences early on, but once Gallo’s unnamed and silent terrorist escapes it becomes an odd, seemingly pointless exercise in moral obfuscation. It opens with him killing two Americans, and his actions that follow don’t earn him any additional sympathy. It’s unclear what the point of it all is exactly… is he the bad guy? Is the US government the aggressor? Is the fat lady who unwillingly breastfeeds Gallo the true mastermind? I don’t know, and sadly, I also don’t care.

The Woman

Pitch: She is woman, hear her growl…

Why Avoid? A supposedly normal family man who runs a tight ship at home finds a feral woman in the woods, captures her and chains her up in the barn. All in the name of helping her to become a good woman. The film has plenty of fans so consider my dissent to be the minority opinion, but it simply never worked for me. It’s neither frightening nor shocking, and while it teases black comedy at times it becomes far too frustrating. Character behaviors are nonsensical and stupid, there’s no one worth caring about and the point, that civilized people can be the truly animalistic and cruel ones, is obvious and uninteresting. The ending has a couple small joys but it’s too little too late.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

The Moment of Truth (Criterion)
Restless
Time Traveler: The Girl Who Leapt Through Time

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What are you buying on DVD this week?

Welcome back to This Week In DVD. I had a root canal this morning.

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Redline

In the very distant future a group of retro racers who still use wheel-based vehicles take part in an ultimate race called Redline while dealing with the competition, organized crime and an alien group intent on ending the tournament forever. This Japanese anime is a blast, and fans looking for that elusive crossover between Cannonball Run and Animalympics should look no further. The film opens and closes with some wildly fun race sequences while the middle works to mostly setup the main storyline and relationships between the racers and two leads. Plus boobs!

Nothing to buy this week! Spend your money on dental floss instead so you can hopefully avoid having to get a root canal. Because seriously… the dental dam was an uncomfortable nightmare.

The Ides of March

Pitch: Yes, the scene where Gosling kisses Clooney in the elevator before pummeling Philip Seymour Hoffman is as good as you’ve heard…

Why Rent? A presidential candidate’s (George Clooney) eager and idealistic staffer (Ryan Gosling) discovers working and playing in the top tier political arena can be a soul crushing experience. Clooney directed and co-wrote this depressingly insightful yet highly entertaining look at the modern day world of politics as usual, and both men give strong performances. Gosling has never been particularly interesting, but 2011 saw three very distinct and engaging performances from him. Clooney does a fair job of skewering both sides of the aisle here as well even if he does occasionally lean slightly left.

The Mysteries of Lisbon

Pitch: For those lazy days when you find yourself with a hankering for a four-hour plus historical drama in Portuguese…

Why Rent? A young man named Joao discovers he’s the bastard son of two aristocrats and sets out to learn the truth about his parents. One is a well to do socialite, and the other is a wealthy businessman, and across the film’s incredible running time as well as the story’s decades and miles traveled these three characters explore the rich tapestry of people, events and coincidences that life has to offer. I’d be lying if I said I managed to watch this movie in one sitting. Or three. But fans of historical costume drama with a hint of magical realism will find much to savor here.

Undocumented

Pitch: I’m Ron Paul, and I approve of this message…

Why Rent? A group of college students shooting a documentary on illegal immigrants rides along with some Mexicans as they sneak into the United States, but their celebratory arrival is cut short when they’re captured by radical patriots. Chris Peckover’s film mixes its genres some with a little bit of found footage and a little bit of torture horror, but he also infuses it with some strong social commentary. But don’t worry about the message getting in the way of the terror… there’s still more than enough nasty tidbits for your enjoyment. The film does lose some points though for featuring protagonists who whine and roll over instead of fighting back.

Abduction

Pitch: Never bring a six-pack to a gunfight…

Why Avoid? A retarded boy (Taylor Lautner) with hairy palms discovers his parents aren’t who they say they are, and mere minutes later they’re blown up and he’s on a run for his life. Lautner’s first real attempt at a career outside of the Twilight films ends in this disaster from the usually reliable John Singleton. The film doesn’t get a single thing right in its desperate quest to entertain. The acting is subpar, the script is abysmal, the action is tepid, and seeing Maria Bello here is just depressing. Skip it and watch anything else. Seriously. Anything else.

Cold Sweat

Pitch: You know what they say about ladies with cold sweat…

Why Avoid? Two friends find trouble when they’re tricked into entering a house owned by two geriatric madmen prone to dipping scantily clad women in nitroglycerin. Just typing that sentence makes me want to watch the movie again until I remember that it’s a great concept saddled with a poorly executed movie. The bad guys here are old, but no one at any time even tries to beat them down. One of the killers uses a walker for Christ’s sake. The film does earn points for finding various ways to get an attractive and busty Argentinian actress to strip down to nothing but perspiration, but that’s not enough to warrant a recommendation. Skip it and watch Cold Comfort Farm instead.

Delocated: The Complete Seasons One and Two

Pitch: Not hilarity, not reality…

Why Avoid? A man and his family enter the Witness Protection Program and begin starring in a reality TV show at the same time. This is, perhaps predictably, a bad idea. The one-note bit of this series is that the trio wear ski masks to protect their identity but otherwise go about their normal lives. So we see them shopping in masks. Working at a copy shop in a mask. Going out on blind dates in a mask. There’s clearly an audience for this kind of comedy, but I’m not it. Mostly because I hesitate to call it comedy. Skip it and watch a double feature of Witness and Real Life instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Age of Heroes
Belle du Jour (Criterion)
Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star
Caterpillar
Courageous
Killing Bono
Special Treatment

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

Welcome back to This Week In DVD! Not a big or high profile week of releases, but there are some solid titles just the same. And there’s even a theme! Of sorts. More than a few of the titles below far exceeded my expectations including HBO’s Boardwalk Empire which I feared would be little more than a period piece Sopranos, Anna Faris’ latest comedy (What’s Your Number?) that I never expected to be so damn funny and charming, and my pick of the week about the accounting behind the business of baseball. Because seriously, how could that not be boring as dirt?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Moneyball

Billy Beane (Brad Pitt), the general manager of the Oakland A’s, tries to end his team’s losing streak with an unorthodox mathematical approach to picking and playing his players. We all know baseball is the most boring team-based sport in the world, so it would seem to follow that a two-hour plus movie about the behind the scenes management of a baseball team would be a complete and utter snooze-fest. But Moneyball is a fascinating watch even when Pitt and Jonah Hill are just bouncing stats back and forth and comparing players. The end feels a bit underwhelming, but getting there is far more interesting and engaging than any baseball game.

Boardwalk Empire: The Complete First Season

Pitch: I wish I’d stop confusing Paz Vega with Paz de la Huerta. It’s just not fair to Paz…

Why Buy? Atlantic City, 1920. Prohibition has made the production, transportation and sale of alcohol an illegal act. It also makes a handful of men very, very rich when they do just that. HBO’s epic series follows the local politicians, gangsters, immigrants, gunmen and more and creates a rich, character driven drama with violence and sex-filled punctuations. Fantastic characters and performances abound, but the four highlights are Steve Buscemi, Michael Pitt, Kelly Macdonald and Michael Stuhlbarg. The DVD is loaded with bonus features too meaning you get a lot of bang for your buck.

1911

Pitch: Jackie Chan’s 100th film takes place the year he was born…

Why Rent? The early 20th century saw China’s grand Qing Dynasty overthrown and the founding of the nation’s new republic take place. It’s a source of great pride in the Communist country, and film goers were treated to a few renditions of the event last year on the 100 year anniversary. Jackie Chan’s 100th film dove-tailed nicely with it all, and he directs and stars in this historical action/drama. The war violence is solid, but it’s a bit too easy to get lost amidst the events, characters and motivations of it all. Still, Chan is as engaging as always and you can never, I repeat never, go wrong with Bing Bing Li.

Answer This!

Pitch: I’ll take generic straight to DVD comedies for $100 Alex…

Why Rent? A college TA (Christopher Gorham) on the fast track to a career and guaranteed tenure (due his father’s place at the university) finds himself at a crossroads between following the expected path and forging a new one. The lovely and big-cheeked Arielle Kebbel plays the “only in the movies” hot girl who is immediately attracted to the trivia-loving geek. This is a harmless and mildly entertaining comedic diversion that you won’t regret watching… even if it is because you’ll almost immediately forget watching it. It’s also advertised as being from “the producer of ‘Funny or Die!’” as if that should mean something to anyone. But in case you’re curious, no, Will Ferrell is not in this movie.

GI Joe: Series 2- Season 1

Pitch: “Got to get tough! Yo Joe! Got to get tough! Yo Joe…”

Why Rent? Shout! Factory continues to fight the good fight with this release of all 24 episodes from the 1989 second series including the 5-part miniseries, “Operation Dragonfire.” The animation is a bit dodgy compared to the first series, but it’s still a fun show for fans who remember playing with the action figures and vehicles. And President Obama could learn a lesson from the episode “General Confusion” which sees the Joes’ budget cut when their costs are viewed as excessive and unnecessary. Can they defeat the liberal bean counters in time to defeat COBRA?

What’s Your Number?

Pitch: Of all the sexist double standards this is most definitely one of them…

Why Rent? A woman (Anna Faris) discovers she’s slept with almost twice the average number of men American women have been with and decides she can’t add any more to the list. So she begins to go back through her dating history in the hopes of finding an ex to marry since they won’t add to her double digit number. But uh oh… she may not be able to resist the charms and pecs of her equally slutty neighbor (Chris Evans)! Both leads are funny here, and they’re joined by several small, supporting performances that also bring the laughs including Joel McHale, Chris Pratt, Andy Samberg, Martin Freeman and more. You probably won’t agree, but I found this to be a far funnier and more “pro-female comedy” than Bridesmaids.

A Darker Reality

Pitch: “You know what scrotum tastes like? I got lots of friends in here…”

Why Avoid? A pair of crazies kidnap and torture women then send clues to a cop and a criminal psychologist. This is an ugly film both in tone and technical style, but while the former can be forgiven in the face of talent the latter proves there’s no talent to be found. Daniel Baldwin, the brother with the lowest self esteem, stars as one of the psychosWhen the highlight of your movie is the possible sighting of an uncredited John Murray (one of Bill’s younger brothers) it really doesn’t bode well for the rest. Skip it and go watch Homicide: Life On the Street instead.

Killer Elite

Pitch: Guns don’t kill people. These guys kill people with guns…

Why Avoid? When Danny’s (Jason Statham) mentor (Robert De Niro) in the espionage game is kidnapped he’s forced to carry out a series of final missions in order to win the old man’s freedom. Clive Owen stars as his mustachioed enemy, and he’s also the only reason for watching the movie. So why is it in the Avoid section? Because there isn’t nearly enough of him in this near six hour long flick. Well, it feels like six hours anyway. It’s reportedly based on a true story, but the action scenes, while underwhelming, still feel far removed from reality. Skip it and go watch The Killer Elite instead.

There Be Dragons

Pitch: Where’s a bald Matthew McConaughey when you need him…

Why Avoid? A journalist (Dougray Scott) is tasked with covering the story of a priest up for sainthood, but his investigation reveals his own father shared a past with the man that included drama, betrayal and the horrors of the Spanish civil war. Director Roland Joffe makes visually attractive films, of which this is one, but unfortunately that’s the only positive this time. The story is a slow slog that moves between the son’s present and his father’s past, but the events never add up to anything of real weight. And you know it’s a lost cause when even Olga Kurylenko can’t save a movie. Skip it and go watch Reign of Fire instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Arrietty (UK)
Attenberg (UK)
Australia After Dark
Film Socialisme
The Hellstrom Chronicle
Project Nim (UK)

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

The Guard

A smuggling ring in a small Irish seaside town draws the attention of an FBI agent (Don Cheadle), and he’s forced to team up with a local cop (Brendan Gleeson) of dubious morality if he hopes to crack the case. John Michael McDonagh’s wonderfully foul and often witty black comedy offers a great pairing with Gleeson and Cheadle playing off of each other to perfection.

Gleeson in particular shines as a rude, sarcastic and possibly racist hick who may be a better comedian than police officer. This one gets compared to the superior In Bruges for a few different reasons, but it stands quite strong on its own.

Frankenhooker (UK) (Blu)

Pitch: “The vivacious young girl was instantly reduced to a tossed human salad. A salad that police are still trying to gather up. A salad that was once named Elizabeth…”

Why Buy? A young man’s girlfriend is killed in an unfortunate lawnmower accident, but he saves her head in the hope of reconstructing and resurrecting her. Of course he’ll need additional body parts which is where some of NYC’s finest hookers come in to the picture. Director Frank Henenlotter’s most entertaining movie gets the special Arrow Video treatment, and the result is a great looking presentation paired with some solid extras. **This is a region free Blu-ray from the UK. It will play on your Blu-ray player.**

3D Sex & Zen: Extreme Ecstasy (UK)

Pitch: You’ll come for the topless Asian women playing mahjong in 3D, but you’ll stay for the five foot long CGI phallus spinning the wagon wheel…

Why Buy? A scholar meets and marries a beautiful woman but when he realizes he can’t quite please her fully he heads to an underground love den for lessons in the sexy stuff. This is clearly a niche flick, but anyone who knows me knows that it’s a niche I like to frequent. The 3D element provides a few laughs, but the main draw is obviously the sufficiently erotic and often over the top soft-core sex scenes. So sue me. The movie loses its way though around the hour mark when it starts turning more than a little violent and misogynistic, so it’s not worth more than a rental. A very sexy rental. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Contagion

Pitch: Goesintight. Spank you…

Why Rent? Gwyneth Paltrow goes to Hong Kong, and the only gift she brings home to her family is a deadly bat/pig disease. Soon the virus is spreading around the world, and Steven Soderbergh’s film tracks the various people falling victim to it and racing to fight it. The film is an engaging and seemingly realistic portrayal of what would happen in this situation, but none of the characters are ever given time to really connect with the audience. Still, the movie is a fairly fascinating watch for fans of the end of the world as we know it.

I Am

Pitch: “Holy testicle Tuesday…”

Why Rent? Tom Shadyac has directed seven feature films (from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective to Evan Almighty), and all but one of them were big box-office hits. But a few years ago he had an accident that led to some fairly startling life changes. His latest film is a documentary about his search for answers to the question of how we can fix humanity’s biggest and most important issues. Shadyac is a funny and unpretentious guy, and his quest leads him to talk with scientists, politicians, spiritual leaders, philosophers, and others. The end result is more a collection of common sense conclusions than anything else, but Shadyac’s personality and sincerity make for a compelling and entertaining watch.

I’m Glad My Mother Is Alive

Pitch: This is the film We Need to Talk About Kevin should have been…

Why Rent? A young man named Thomas has a troubled childhood in the knowledge that he and his brother were adopted after their mother gave them up when he was just a small boy. Once he reaches adulthood he seeks her out and strikes up an odd relationship with her and her new son. This is a fairly bleak drama at times that works as a sad and emotionally charged slowburn of sorts. Vincent Rottiers plays Thomas as a young adult and does a spectacular job of portraying the confusion and mixed emotions that meeting his birth mother creates. The film jumps back and forth in time to tell the boy’s story and to set up the eventual ending. Heavy stuff, but worth a look.

Justified: The Complete Second Season

Pitch: Don’t ever doubt the sizer of Robert Fure’s Olyphant boner…

Why Rent? US Marshal Raylan Givens (Timothy Olyphant) continues to fight the good fight in Kentucky against bad guys of all stripes, but this season the worst one isn’t a guy at all. Mags Bennett (Margo Martindale) and her boys (including Lost‘s Jeremy Davies) take charge of the area’s criminal activity. Raylan’s history with the Bennett’s further complicate his job as peace-maker, but it also allows for some fantastic interactions with the three sons. Boyd Crowder (Walton Goggins) remains a player as well, but his arc here is a bit less satisfying than it was in season one in part because it teases the unrealistic. Still, Olyphant and Goggins have great chemistry together, and the show remains a fun and exciting watch.

The Last Lions

Pitch: Ladies listen when Scar speaks. They also lose their knickers…

Why Rent? Jeremy Irons narrates this National Geographic documentary about the lions of Africa, and while it focuses on a female and her cubs the tale is reflective of the species’ future in general. We follow a male, female and three cubs as they struggle to survive the elements, other lions and everything else life can throw at them, and it isn’t long before they’re dropping like flies. The male lion’s demise early on is a sad and vicious heart breaker, but the crocodile-infested river crossing wears on the nerves like nothing else. NatGeo doesn’t fool around with as much narrative as Disney docs do, but they provide enough to hold onto so that you’ll care what happens to these lions in particular and their kind in general. And it’s not looking all that bright unfortunately.

Mildred Pierce

Pitch: Look! Kate Winslet playing a drab American housewife whose husband cheats on her…

Why Rent? It’s the early 1930′s, and Mildred Pierce (Kate Winslet) is a divorced mother of two after her husband walks out on them. She struggles at first to hold her head high for both her pride and her children, but eventually succumbs to a depression ravaged world and the meager opportunities that are available. Winslet does a fantastic job here with a character who constantly walks the line between likeable and not, and supporting cast members including Guy Pearce, Melissa Leo, Evan Rachel Wood, James LeGros and more help flesh out the story. Director Todd Haynes does a brilliant job in presenting the details of the time in such a lush and expansive way. My only real gripe, and it’s not a small one, is that the story being told doesn’t really need a five plus hour running time.

Puncture

Pitch: Who would win in a battle between Chris Evans’ pecs and Taylor Lautner’s abs? We all would…

Why Rent? Mike Weiss (Chris Evans) is one half of a low profile law firm content with small cases and smaller payoffs, but when a potential bombshell comes across his desk he decides to risk it all and take on a giant corporation and industry. The fact that Weiss is a hard living drug addict is the least of his worries. This true story plays like a smaller scale Erin Brockovich, and while Evans is no Julia Roberts he does a fine job with the role and manages to show both a self destructive side as well as one concerned for the well being of others. The story is a bit rote at times, but Weiss offers up some interesting character flaws including an ending that I didn’t see coming.

Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark

Pitch: Because you won’t be afraid of this movie…

Why Avoid? A woman (Katie Holmes) moves into a creepy old house with her new husband (Guy Pearce) and his daughter, but soon an infestation of little humanoids comes spilling from the basement furnace to make their lives miserable. This remake of the classic TV movie is one of last year’s bigger disappointments. All three of the leads are fine (yes, even Holmes), but the film is never scary. The creatures are shown too soon and too clearly, the characters are frustrating idiots, and the little girl in particular will have you wishing she’d get eaten within the first thirty minutes. Skip it and watch The New Daughter instead.

The Fat Boy Chronicles

Pitch: “How come you’re always such a fussy young man? Don’t want no Captain Crunch, don’t want no Raisin Bran. Well, don’t you know that other kids are starving in Japan, So eat it, just eat it…”

Why Rent? An overweight kid has a hard time in high school. I feel bad knocking such a sincere effort, but this is barely inspiring and not very well written. It’s also a veritable checklist of cliches including generic bullies who lack math skills and have demanding parents, oblivious teachers, an emo girl who cuts herself because of deep seated scars, a troubled kid with an alcoholic and abusive father (who wears a wife beater) and a heavy dose of melodrama. This feels like a fat kid version of “It gets better” in that it advocates passivity, time and wishful thinking over taking your future into your own hands. To be fair, Jimmy does exercise and lose some weight, but that’s presented as a side accomplishment in addition to the ridiculous resolution we get instead… bullies will respect you if you tutor them in math and emo girls will like you because they can see the inner you! The programs to teach kids self defense/restraining moves against bullies make more sense and deserve more exposure. Skip it and watch Heavyweights instead.

I Don’t Know How She Does It

Pitch: Olivia Munn is the only worthwhile part of this film. Which should tell you something about the movie…

Why Avoid? A woman (Sarah Jessica Parker) somehow manages to work full time while also being a parent! What will Hollywood try to make us swallow next? The incredulous nature of this tale is only slightly lessened by the fact that Parker’s character has a nanny. But somehow she still manages to do it! What she can’t do apparently is make a worthwhile movie with any point, heart, or laughs (aside from the one’s Munn provides). Skip it and watch Mr. Mom instead. Greg Kinnear, Pierce Brosnan and Kelsey Grammar also show up for a paycheck here.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Don’t Let Him In
Drones
Red: Werewolf Hunter
Shark Night

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Fish Story

A comet heads toward Earth, but as the planet awaits destruction a few strangers sit in a record shop discussing how a mysterious song from decades ago just might save the world. From that starting point the film moves across space and time to tell a story about friendship, heroism, fate and more. Director Yoshihiro Nakamura (Golden Slumber, A Boy and His Samurai) has a true talent for tying multiple threads  up with real heart and character. The movie is actually a few years old, but it’s also the reason the term ‘blind buy’ was invented. Seriously. This is near perfect mix of whimsy, action, suspense and heart, and deserves to be seen by everyone. Check out Cole Abaius’ full review.

Archer: The Complete Season Two

Pitch: Your fate and breasts are in his hands…

Why Buy? Sterling Archer (H Jon Benjamin) is the pride of ISIS, an international spy organization charged with protecting America’s freedoms and such. Unfortunately for America, he’s pretty much a moron. Happily though, he and the show are also funny as hell. Adam Reed’s animated FX comedy is now in its third season, and thanks to sharp writing and an even sharper cast of voice actors it remains one of the more hilarious shows on TV. Chris Parnell, Judy Greer, Aisha Tyler and Jessica Walter co-star, and together they help make this one of the best ensemble casts on the air.

Kill List (UK)

Pitch: “Prey you’re not on it!” is the kind of tag line a shitty movie with this title would use. This is not that movie…

Why Buy? A retired hitman finds his day to day domestic life anything but blissful, and when his old partner offers him one more job with a lucrative payday he jumps at the chance. He learns too late that you should always look before you leap and soon finds himself in over his head. His inner sadist comes out, the hits become highly suspect, and something unexpected is waiting around the corner. Ben Wheatley’s second film is a violently twisted thriller that fuses intensity with a blackly comic heart. Avoid images from the film as many of them are spoilers and see this movie now (or in April when IFC releases it stateside). Check out my full review. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

The Borgias: The First Season

Pitch: Who knew the Church was filled with such perverts…

Why Rent? Rome, the 15th century, and the Pope has just died. The cardinals all vie for the job, and through a successful combination of deal making and blackmail the last man standing is Rodrigo Borgia (Jeremy Freakin Irons). This series follows his rise to power and his family’s corrupt rule including all the violence, sex and misbehaving afforded to a pay cable show. Actually, it’s fairly light on the nudity compared to shows like Camelot and Game of Thrones, but Neil Jordan’s creation is still constantly engaging and well made.

Chop

Pitch: “He really loves the one where Arnold and Dudley almost get fingered by that guy in the bicycle shop…”

Why Rent? Lance Reed is about to have a very bad day. A stranger offers him a ride after his car dies, but the help ends with him drugged and tied to a chair where the madman proceeds to cut off body parts until Lance apologies for something he’s done in the past. But what misdeed is he paying for here? And will he remember his transgression before he’s nothing but a head and a torso? This latest addition to the BloodyDisgusting Selects label is a fun and gory horror comedy that surprises with a sharp script and some honest laughs. It could have been bloodier though.

Final Destination 5

Pitch: Why hasn’t anyone tried to kill Tony Todd’s character yet? Seriously. Kill that bastard…

Why Rent? You know the drill. The movie opens with a group of young people getting killed in a wonderfully gory accident which is then revealed to be a premonition which saves several lives until death returns and begins claiming the survivors in the order they should have died. Again, in the goriest ways possible. The acting, writing, dialogue and story are all a wash, but the movie is watchable for one reason… the same reason the series as a whole is watchable actually. The deaths are often creative and wonderfully bloody fun, and the gymnastics one here is alone worth the price of admission. Check out Kate Erbland’s remarkably kind full review.

The First Grader

Pitch: Strongest memory I have of the first grade is accidentally tripping Sister Hermina…

Why Rent? Maruge (Oliver Litondo) is in his eighties, but after a lifetime of strife and warfare he’s finally taking the opportunity to go to school. His arrival causes an uproar though due not only to his age but also to his historically unpopular past. Justin Chadwick’s kind-hearted film is based on a true story that is effortlessly inspiring as it explores one man’s self worth when held up against his country’s own. This is a sweet movie that succeeds on a charming innocence, and while it feels more than a little lightweight at times that doesn’t diminish its message.

A Good Old Fashioned Orgy

Pitch: A rare sex comedy that tickles your heart as well as your naughty bits…

Why Rent? A group of thirty-something friends are forced to say goodbye to the beach house they use for parties and decide to go out with a bang. They plan to have an orgy! TV writers Alex Gregory and Peter Huyck make their film debuts here, and the results are far funnier than most of the big name comedies that you actually saw in theaters this year. The laughs come from the script and situations, but the cast’s comedic timing is an even bigger factor. Jason Sudeikis takes a rare lead role, and he’s joined by Tyler Labine, Nick Kroll, Martin Starr, Leslie Bibb, Will Forte and the lovely Michelle Borth. Fans of laughter and awkward nudity should definitely give it a chance.

Lovely By Surprise (UK)

Pitch: Like a light-hearted film from the Polish Brothers…

Why Rent? A young author having trouble finishing her latest novel decides to kill off her main protagonist, but he escapes her prose and enters the real world on the run. A used care salesman struggles as a single parent after the death of his wife also extinguishes his fighting spirit. This indie flick brings these two stories together into one, and while parts are slow going and seemingly pointless there’s more than enough charm on display here to carry viewers from scene to scene. Fantastic ending too. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

The Skin I Live In (UK)

Pitch: Puss. In a body stocking…

Why Rent? A young woman spends her days in a sparsely decorated room wearing a form-fitting body suit and practicing yoga. Any potential for voyeuristic sexiness is thrown out the window though when it’s revealed that she’s an experiment in progress under the watchful eye of Dr. Robert Ledgard (Antonio Bandaras). But who she is and why she’s there will be the biggest revelations of all. Or not. Director Pedro Almodovar’s latest is a horror film of sorts about identity, affection and gender politics, and it is absolutely gorgeous to look at. It’s also a much needed reminder that Bandaras can in fact act. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

The Tunnel

Pitch: Seems like a missed opportunity not calling this The Chunnel…

Why Rent? Journalists uncover a minor conspiracy within the Australian government to conceal the existence of and block access to a series of tunnels beneath the city streets. They procure a guide and head down into the network of steam tunnels and sewers and eventually discover the secret. Now they just need to get back out alive! Seriously though, this is a legitimately creepy little film that does found footage right. The actors are solid, the shakey cam is kept to a bearable minimum, and the scares are actually scary. The film was financed with an interesting business model as well (I donated!), and if nothing else their official site is an interesting read.

Apollo 18

Pitch: It’s human hubris to think pet rocks can be domesticated…

Why Avoid? Did you know NASA conducted space missions that aren’t in our history books? It’s true. Probably. Anyway, this film posits an ill-fated Apollo mission that sent three bland astronauts to the moon only to see the whole thing fall apart when something alien begins to infect the crew. As evidenced by the film directly above the found footage genre can still produce the occasional winner, but more often than not it’s a refuge for lazy film makers looking for a horror movie with a high profit margin. This film clearly cost less than a used DVD of Apollo 13, and it’s entirely scare-free. There’s a singular cool shot (little beasties inside a man’s helmet), but it’s not worth watching the entire film. Check out Robert Levin’s full review.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Brighton Rock
Hostel: Part III
In the Name of the King 2: Two Worlds
The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret: Series One
The Pool Boys
Shameless: The Complete First Season

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Warrior

Two men, one a high school teacher with a family (Joel Edgerton) and the other an ex-Marine hero (Tom Hardy), find themselves on different paths to the same goal: winning a high-profile MMA tournament and the large cash prize that goes with it. The story moves back and forth between the men and their situations until they finally merge together in the ring. Sports stories in general aren’t really my thing, but I do enjoy a tale well told. Director Gavin O’Connor and his two leads (as well as supporting player Nick Nolte) fill the film with heart, great character and honest suspense. Most surprising of all, both men have an equal shot at victory and viewers will be thrilled and satisfied whichever way it ends. Lots of fantastic films were missed by audiences by year, but this is one underdog that deserves a second shot at victory. Check out Robert Levin’s full review.

Julia’s Eyes

Pitch: Spanish remake of the Mexican thriller, Jose’s Cojones…

Why Buy? A woman suffering from degenerative eyesight is taunted either by madness or a madman, and when she winds up dead her sister comes to town to set her house in order. Unfortunately sis suffers from the same illness, and as her sight begins to go the terrors begin to increase. This Spanish thriller executive produced by Guillermo del Toro is a stylish and at times terrifying movie that milks scares from an already frightening situation. It suffers a bit when it comes to the resolution, but it’s a fantastic watch for genre fans all the same. Del Toro’s name is bandied about quite a bit, but the lesson here seems to be that while his US productions don’t always pay off (ahem Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark ahem) his overseas ones are pretty damn solid. Check out my full review.

Margin Call

Pitch: Anyone remember the financial meltdown from a few years back? No? No one? I wonder if these white guys in suits know anything about it…

Why Buy? This fact-based look at an investment firm’s actions in the 24 hours leading up to 2008′s financial crisis sounds like a bore and/or a chore, but instead it manages to be at turns thrilling, darkly comic, upsetting, affecting and surprising. The film consists almost entirely of dialogue, but even as it deals with complicated financial issues and numbers it never becomes dry or confusing. The all-star cast certainly helps as well including Kevin Spacey, Zachary Quinto, Simon Baker, Stanley Tucci, Paul Bettany, Jeremy Irons and more. It’s a fascinating watch, and it serves as a warning for the future by way of an explanation of the present.

Blackthorn

Pitch: Speaking of westerns, when is Kevin Costner going to make another one? Seriously, Open Range is a solid flick…

Why Rent? Decades after Butch Cassidy (Sam Shepard) was supposedly killed in a Bolivian shootout he decides it’s time to leave his false life in South America and head back to the States to see his nephew. But once a gunfighter skirting the law for monetary gain and moral superiority always a gunfighter skirting the law for monetary gain and moral superiority. Maybe not, but he does run into trouble and soon he finds his peaceful retirement interrupted by gunfights, treachery, and Stephen Rea. There isn’t a lot of action to be found here, but there’s enough of it combined with a strong performance from Shepard to warrant a viewing.

Columbiana

Pitch: See the sequel to The Professional that never was…

Why Rent? A young woman (Zoe Saldana) works her way through a list of baddies associated with her parents’ murder when she was a child, but her quest comes to a close as she nears the main villain. Things get out of hand when she lets her vision get clouded by love. Aww. This is actually a reworking of Luc Besson’s abandoned script for a Leon sequel (although my suggestion from a couple years ago is still a much better idea), and while the elements are there it bears none of that film’s heart or honesty. It is goofy as hell though with action sequences that go beyond ludicrous, a heroine that annoys more than she engages and a love story that falls flatter than Milla Jovavich. Still, fans of stupid action (me included) will find some minor enjoyment here. Check out Neil Miller’s full review.

Midnight In Paris

Pitch: Co-stars Léa Seydoux, so there’s that…

Why Rent? A hack screenwriter (Owen Wilson) who feels that he’s given up on his dream of writing novels finds himself in Paris with his constantly bitchy fiance and her even bitchier parents. While the dullard’s days are spent trapped with his terrible, soon-to-be in-laws he takes strolls through the city late at night and discovers a magical entrance into a literary yesteryear. Soon he’s hobnobbing with F Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway and others, and he may have even found what real love feels like. Woody Allen’s biggest box-office hit is also his most critically acclaimed film in years, but it’s also wildly overrated. The film finds some fun moments with the long dead writers, but every minute spent away from that mystical realm grates on the nerves. Check out Simon Gallagher’s full review.

Straw Dogs

Pitch: In case of rape and/Southern “hospitality” please bypass Straw and Stick and go directly to Brick Dogs…

Why Avoid? A well to do couple (James Marsden and Kate Bosworth) return to her small hometown down south and encounter trouble with the locals when she flashes a group of inebriated horndogs and he shelters a mentally challenged murderer. Reading that over the movie sure does sound more interesting than it actually is. This remake of Sam Peckinpah’s well known original doesn’t bother offering anything new and instead sets up a basic rape/revenge tale with no style or personality of its own. And while the sexual politics of it all may have worked in 1971 they don’t work here. Director Rod Lurie should know better. Skip it and watch The Contender instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Beware of Christians
Burke & Hare
Catch .44
Dolphin Tale
Saint Nick
The Tempest
Toast

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What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Apocalypse, CA

It’s the end of the world thanks to an impending impact from a very large asteroid, but where most films with that premise would focus on efforts to avert disaster this smaller budget indie has a bit more on its mind. John is using Earth’s final days trying to make up for lost time, but his attempts to right past wrongs meet with questionable results. As you’d expect those results include body swapping, Armageddon, a 100-foot tall giant and more. Obviously. Imagine Bellflower with more appealing characters, a lighter tone and far less whining, and you’ll have a good idea what to expect from writer/director Chad Peter’s film. Well, not really, but the point is it’s an interesting and creative look at gender and relationships through an apocalyptic lens that makes up for its budgetary restraints and occasionally dodgy acting (I’m looking at you “Hank”) with wit, foul language and impressive visual effects.

Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame

Pitch: This ancient Chinese secret is more concerned with ass-kickery than with laundry…

Why Buy? A banished detective (Andy Lau) is released from prison on the condition that he prevent the assassination of the woman who put him there, but he’ll need all the help he can get when he comes to realize the full extent of the threat facing her kingdom. Tsui Hark has been in a bit of a slump for a while now, but he bursts back onto the scene with this martial arts and magic filled adventure that brings Sherlock Holmes to ancient China with gloriously entertaining action sequences, a smart and witty script and fun performances from all involved. Plus Bingbing Li who is as gorgeous to look at as her name is fun to say. That’s to say, very.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes

Pitch: Hey Tim Burton! Hey Matthijs van Heijningen Jr! This is how you make a prequel…

Why Buy? A scientist with a crooked smile (James Franco) accidentally creates an intelligent ape while working on a cure for Alzheimers, and that fur-covered Einstein starts to create trouble in the Bay Area. It also leads to a future Earth that will eventually play host to a visit from Charlton Heston and friends. Rupert Wyatt’s prequel to the classic Apes franchise is blockbuster entertainment at its finest with stunning special effects, fantastic set pieces and thought provoking concepts. It shouldn’t have worked at all, but just about all of it works beautifully.

Action Double Feature: The Nickel Ride & 99 and 44/100% Dead

Pitch: Wonder if this John Frankenheimer fellow can film a worthwhile car chase…

Why Rent? The latest Action Double Feature from Shout! Factory features the Jason Miller-starring thriller, The Nickel Ride, and the Richard Harris action comedy, 99 and 44/100% Dead. If you’re like me you’ve never heard of either film, but both are actually somewhat pleasant surprises. The Nickel Ride stars Miller as the guy who manages multiple warehouses for the mob, but as mob-related plans are prone to do things soon start falling apart in dramatic fashion. It’s well acted but a bit slow. The terribly titled 99 and 44/100% Dead stars Harris as a glasses-wearing man for hire who gets shit done in an odd GTA-like world where crime, car chases, and gun fights are the norm. The fight choreography blows, but the car and gun action is pretty cool. It is a John Frankenheimer joint after all.

Circumstance

Pitch: Who knew Iran (ex-pats included) would become the …

Why Rent? Two teenage girls in Iran struggle to live in a world that limits expressions of personality and sexuality especially from females. Atafeh (Nikohl Booshen) and Shireen (Sarah Kazemy) discover truths about themselves and what they mean to each other, but Iranian society is a far from welcoming environment. Despite Lionsgate’s attempt to sell this as “an outrageously sexy movie” Circumstance is actually a frustrating and often depressing drama about young lives forced to conform to ridiculously sexist and cruel cultural standards. Both girls give strong performances filled with yearning and desire in a story that follows their diverging paths. Plus, well, there are a couple truly sexy scenes between them too.

Fright Night

Pitch: I was on set of this movie during the night club scene. So that’s cool…

Why Rent? A teenager (Anton Yelchin) with a single mom discovers their new next door neighbor is a vampire (Colin Ferrell), and with the help of his plucky girlfriend (Imogen Poots) and a Las Vegas magician (David Tennant) he sets out to stop the monster’s reign of terror. This remake of the beloved 80s film took a lot of flack and criticism that it didn’t really warrant. The movie has issues to be sure, but it’s still a fun and bloody horror comedy with solid performances and effects.

The Life and Times of Tim: The Complete Second Season

Pitch: You will not envy Tim’s life, but you will enjoy laughing at it…

Why Rent? Imagine an animated version of Demitri Martin with Ray Romano’s voice and George Costanza’s luck, and you’ll have a good idea what to expect with this very funny series on HBO. Tim is a schlub in NYC who just can’t catch a break whether it be at work, out with friends or home with a lady. But his loss is our gain as creator Steve Dildarian and friends find the humor in situations awkward and mundane. The set includes all ten episodes and serves as a good lead in to season three which starts this month.

Sledge Hammer! The Complete Series

Pitch: “I haven’t seen anything this perverted since the Webster holiday special…”

Why Rent? Detective Sledge Hammer (David Rasche) is an LA cop who’d rather shoot first then, well, do anything else. He fights crime with a giant hand gun, a sexist attitude, and a willful ignorance of Miranda rights. This sitcom-ish show from the eighties is front loaded with a variety of stupid jokes, dumb bits and broad comedy, and while it went over a lot better with my teen self than it does now it’s still fun, goofball entertainment.

Kill Katie Malone

Pitch: May be the first eBay-inspired movie. Hopefully the last…

Why Avoid? A battered and beleaguered Dean Cain auctions a mysterious wooden box online which he claims contains the ghost of a long dead servant girl, but when some crazy college kids buy it all hell breaks loose. That actually makes it sound more exciting than it is. This ghost-in-a-box tale offers little reason to care about anything that’s happening onscreen to any of the characters. On the plus side the trio of college buds aren’t annoying, but they’re also not very interesting. There are a couple mildly effective ghost effects, but the movie as a whole is scare-free and often nonsensical. Skip it and watch The Innkeepers instead.

Little Deaths

Pitch: “We all have appetites. Some of us just have different tastes…”

Why Avoid? This anthology horror film from the UK mixes sex and death in three separate tales to varied effect. Unfortunately none of those effects are all that interesting or exciting. The first story opens promisingly enough with a couple who take a young homeless girl into their home, but it flips on a dime to a fairly goofy denouement. Story two has a crazy idea at its core, but it’s excruciatingly slow and uninteresting in its execution. The final segment is the best of the bunch and features a brutal and squirm-inducing finale, but getting there is once again a dull drag. Skip it and watch season one of The Hitchhiker instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

The Black Power Mixtape: 1967-1975
Branded to Kill (Criterion)
Eames: The Architect and the Painter
Kung Fu Panda 2
Ra.One
Tanner Hall
Tokyo Drifter (Criterion)

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Body Puzzle

Someone is killing Italians and removing singular parts of their anatomy, and those pieces are winding up in Joanna Pacula’s house. Surprisingly, she’s none too thrilled at this turn of events, and with the help of a determined detective they work to discover the killer’s identity and motive. Lamberto Bava’s early nineties giallo isn’t well known, and having finally seen it I can’t understand why. The kills and set-pieces are stylishly done, the script is fairly sharp, and the movie as a whole is good fun. It’s actually become my favorite of Bava the younger’s films. RaroVideo’s new DVD also features a strong and vibrant transfer and a booklet featuring an essay on the film. [DVD includes no extra features.]

Dragon Tattoo Trilogy: Extended Edition

Pitch: Bigger, longer and girthier for your viewing pleasure…

Why Buy? A decades-old mystery haunts an old man so he hires a disgraced journalist to find the answers who in turn hires a sexually abused, sociopathic computer hacker named Lisbeth Salander. Sparks, blood, and Ikea furniture fly. Stieg Larsson’s European Emmy-winning Millennium Trilogy comes to DVD in its original full length form for the first time, and while it isn’t necessarily better it’s definitely longer. Two hours of additional footage has been restored throughout the three parts mostly to incidental side stories that help enhance the world if not the main narrative. Fans of the books and films will want to check it out, but if you don’t already like the films this new cut won’t change that. [DVD includes a documentary and interviews.]

Point Blank

Pitch: The manliest male nurse since Greg Focker…

Why Rent? Samuel is busy at home with a very pregnant wife and equally busy at work as he prepares for career advancement, but when some bad guys kidnap his lady and force him to free a man in police custody he discovers it was all prelude to a nonstop 24 hours. This French thriller from the director of Anything for Her is fast-paced, suspenseful and features more than a few stellar action sequences. Some of the characters get a short shrift due to the pacing, but the film still finds time to show the heart and love between Samuel and his wife. It makes his motivation and our attention that much stronger. [DVD includes a 'making of' feature, a photo gallery, and a trailer.]

Big Love: The Complete Fifth Season

Pitch: “Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same…” Oscar Wilde

Why Rent? Newly elected Utah Senator Bill Henrickson (Bill Paxton) has just announced he practices polygamy, and many of his constituents are none too pleased. This public drama bleeds into his home life and can’t help but affect his three wives (Jeanne Tripplehorn, Chloe Sevigny, Ginnifer Goodwin) as well. This final season of HBO’s equally fascinating and frustrating show wraps up their story with big questions and fewer answers, but it also returns to the show’s strength which is its odd but endearing family unit. The complete series is also releasing today (review coming soon), and fans of fantastic character and drama should consider adding it to their Christmas list. [DVD includes featurettes.]

Come Have Coffee With Us

Pitch: Love, Italian style…

Why Rent? An old man dies and leaves his estate to his three daughters, but when a tax inspector hoping to find a wealthy wife sets his sights on them the manipulation and sexual shenanigans begin. The women are all somewhat unattractive virgins and the man’s attention throws them off at first, but it’s not long before they become the sex-addicted aggressors in this comedy of gender and manners. This is far from a screwball comedy or farce as most of the laughs are of the far more subtle variety, but watching the women take charge off their sexual identities is a light and charming diversion. [DVD includes an interview.]

Cowboys & Aliens

Pitch: Daniel Craig! Harrison Ford! Sam Rockwell! Olivia Wilde! Paul Dano! All wasted…

Why Rent? A man (Daniel Craig) awakens in the desert with no memories and a very weird bracelet. He makes his way into town and soon finds himself at odds with a vicious land baron (Harrison Ford) and a gaggle of invading aliens. Wait, what? Director Jon Favreau’s adaptation of the comic series really should have been a bigger and better film than this. The story mashes up two typically fun and engaging genres but somehow winds up with an incredibly generic popcorn picture. Performances and effects are fine, but there’s little to no charm or energy to be found. Still, the cast and mildly entertaining action make it worth a watch for fans of blockbusters that could have been. [DVD includes featurettes.]

The Help

Pitch: You missed a little something…

Why Rent? Kathryn Stockett’s NYT bestseller about a secret writing project between Black servants in the 1960s South comes to the screen in this unexpected box-office hit. A young white woman (Emma Stone) organizes a group of women (including Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer) to tell the stories of their daily experiences working in the homes of racists, bigots and the indifferent. The movie was a success, but it also came with plenty of criticism from people who accused it of being another example of Blacks needing white heroes. Arguments are valid on both sides, but all that really matters is the film is mildly entertaining enough to warrant a watch. [DVD includes deleted scenes and music video.]

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Volume XXII

Pitch: “I don’t care…”

Why Rent? Shout! Factory continues their release schedule of MST3K titles with the 22nd volume of the classic series once again collecting four films for our viewing pleasure. This time we get The Brute Man, Mighty Jack, The Violent Years and perhaps the most often requested episode, Time of the Apes. Those last two are the best of the set and find much to laugh at and with in the tales of girl gangs and monkeys gone wild. As usual Shout! Factory also includes four collectible mini posters in this box set as well. For fans of laughter and bad movies only. [DVD includes introductions, interviews and a couple short docs.]

Transformers Prime: Darkness Rising

Pitch: Michael Bay could have taken some pointers…

Why Rent? Megatron and the Decepticons are up to their old tricks, and only Optimus Prime and the rest of the Autobots can save Earth once again. This feature length animated film starts with a robot execution and continues with some fairly epic action and adventure that should entertain young and old fans alike. The CGI-style animation is smooth and fluid, the writing is solid enough for a kids show, and it never bores. (Only one of those things is true about the Michael Bay movies.) The animation style is also a vast improvement over the blocky, “classic” style from the Beast Wars cartoons of the nineties. [DVD includes featurettes.]

Astral City: A Spiritual Journey

Pitch: New Age mumbo jumbo knows no language barriers…

Why Avoid? A doctor and family man (with little time for his family) dies and awakens in purgatory. After a long time wandering the dirty and violent nightworld he’s brought to a shiny city that serves as a way station leading to acceptance and reincarnation back to Earth. This is the most expensive film in Brazilian history, and that is not a fact they should be proud of in the slightest. The film is based on a book that was “channeled” to its author from beyond or some such goofiness, and it’s core message is simply that you must be a better person to earn the gifts of god. That and your family stays with you through every reincarnation cycle… how terrifying. Skip it and watch Albert Brooks’ Defending Your Life instead. [DVD includes a 'making of' and a trailer.]

The Hangover Part II

Pitch: Bigger is rarely better…

Why Avoid? The trio of idiots from The Hangover find themselves in a similar situation during the days leading up to Stu’s wedding to a cute Asian girl (Jamie Chung) who never in a million years would have given him the time of day. I say similar but I meant identical. This mean-spirited and unfunny sequel rehashes just about everything from the far superior original from the drug-induced memory wipe to the faux-masturbation of a human prop (a baby in the first film, an old Thai man here). There’s literally a single laugh to be found here with the rest of the film consisting of obvious bits and cruel gags meant to be humorous but failing miserably. Zack Galifianakis’ role is the biggest disappointment going from a bumbling but endearing fool to a whiny asshole. Skip it and watch The Hangover instead. [DVD includes a gag reel.]

Murder Obsession

Pitch: “After you were sent away she developed an interest in black magic, and it was by this means, coupled with my psychic powers that she was able to induce you to return here…”

Why Avoid? An actor with issues takes his girlfriend and coworkers to meet his mom at their mansion in the woods, but soon people are dying and weirdness ensues. All the usual giallo tropes are here including bloody murders, black-gloved killers and elaborate motivations, but it’s also messy as hell. None of it makes sense, and it’s not helped by special effects that make the ones used in Abbott & Costello’s series of horror comedies look like Stan Winston creations. Seriously, the bats and large spider are laughable. On the bright side there’s also copious amounts of nudity, so I guess it depends on your particular interests. [DVD includes an interview.]

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

The Debt
Design for Living (Criterion)
Don’t Open til Christmas
Jesus Christ: Serial Rapist
Mr. Popper’s Penguins
Rapt
Triple Tap
Worst in Show

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Another Earth

The unfortunately named Rhoda (Brit Marling) is a bright high-school graduate with a limitless future, but on the night a new planet is discovered in the night sky above she celebrates a bit too hard and smashes her car into a family of three. A few years later, Rhoda is released from prison and makes an attempt at an apology to the man (William Mapother) she injured and whose wife and child she killed. Communication with the new planet has also revealed that it is a mirror image of our own as far as geography and population, but that different choices there may have given way to different events. Marling co-wrote this intriguing and often mesmerizing sc-fi/drama with director Mike Cahill, and while the logic and explanation behind the science fiction aspects are woefully lacking the drama, character work and “what if?” scenarios are excellent. As she does in the somewhat superior Sound of My Voice Marling brings an ethereal and fragile presence to the role that makes this tale of loneliness, guilt and hopeful redemption all the more powerful. [The DVD in the Blu-ray/DVD combo pack is devoid of extras, but the Blu features deleted scenes, a music video and featurettes.]

Kidnapped

Pitch: Much like what Congress’ Super Committee underwent the original title of this movie is Secuestrados. A mixing of the two probably would have resulted in agreements on some severe cuts…

Why Buy? A family sits down for a contentious meal at the dinner table, but their time together is interrupted when a trio of villains invades their home and takes them hostage. The intruders are after money and a good time, but the following hour will be anything but entertaining. For the family and bad guys I mean. Viewers who love nail-biting suspense, smart cat and mouse play, and creative film-making will find much to enjoy. Just don’t get me started on the ridiculously shitty final minute. Check out my full review here. [The DVD includes a featurette and trailers.]

Our Idiot Brother

Pitch: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. As a straight man who enjoys a good laugh I would not kick Paul Rudd out of bed…

Why Buy? Ned (Paul Rudd) is a nice guy who also happens to be a bit of a goof. He’s too trusting, too irresponsible and too… Ned. His sisters (Elizabeth Banks, Zooey Deschanel and Emily Mortimer) are better adjusted on the outside, but they’re also a bit too consumed with their own troubles to notice and enjoy the world around them. This is easily the second best ensemble cast of the year (after Horrible Bosses), and every single actor nails it. Rudd especially carries the film with a character that could easily have slipped into an annoying and blundering caricature, and his bantering with Adam Scott are comedic gold. Seriously, someone give them a buddy cop movie already. Check out Robert Levin’s full review here. [The DVD includes commentary, deleted scenes and a featurette.]

Tucker & Dale vs Evil

Pitch: They’ll make you laugh, but not before making you squeal like a piggy…

Why Buy? A group of sex-crazed college kids runs afoul of a pair of hillbillies, and soon the clean-cut young people are dropping like flies. Sounds like a thousand other movies, but the catch here is that Tucker and Dale, the aforementioned hillbillies, are simply trying to help the kids who keep dying through misfortune, accident and misunderstanding. Eli Craig’s film is a funny and subversive take on well worn genre conventions. I lean more towards a Rental, but the fact that the movie sat on a shelf for two years before being dumped to DVD has earned it a bump into the Buy category. Check out Landon Palmer’s full review here. [The DVD includes commentary, outtakes, featurettes and a trailer.]

Vampires

Pitch: “The truth is Elizabeth can’t stop herself from eating children. As for me, when they’re older, I can’t stop myself from making love to them…”

Why Buy? This pseudo documentary crosses This Is Spinal Tap with Man Bites Dog as a film crew explores the lives of a family of Belgian vampires who deal with their situation in different ways. Dinner table etiquette, teen drama, vampire rules and more all come into play as we see how vampires live and die (and live again). This isn’t only the best vampire related movie of the year… it’s the best damn vampire movie in ages. It’s funny as hell, occasionally frightening and sharp as a bloody fang. Check out my full review here. [The DVD includes deleted scenes and a trailer.]

The Wave

Pitch: True story about a young girl who goes surfing and has her arm bitten off by fascism…

Why Buy? Modern day Germany is not a place that’s forgotten about Hitler and his doings, but for many of the country’s youth that’s because they’ve never really understood it in the first place. A high school teacher assigned the task of exploring autocracy with his students sets in motion an experiment in totalitarianism to show them the effects and power of unity and obedience, but the project quickly grows out of control as the teenagers begin taking their new-found power too seriously. The film is suspenseful and dramatic without ever tipping into the unbelievable or melodramatic, and it’s a powerful look at a dark time in history that could very easily happen again if good people do nothing and allow it. It’s message can even be downgraded to apply to gangs, cliques and bullies in general, and it should probably be shown in schools for that very reason. [The DVD includes featurettes and a trailer.]

30 Minutes or Less

Pitch: Remember the Domino’s Dance that delivery drivers had to do if they were late with your pizza? Was that just an urban legend? I don’t know, but either way Jesse Eisenberg does not do one here…

Why Rent? Nick (Jesse Eisenberg) is a down on his luck pizza delivery guy (redundant I know) who’s kidnapped, strapped with a bomb and forced to rob a bank or be evaporated. With the help of his friend Chet (Aziz Ansari) he tries to outwit the kidnappers (Danny McBride and Nick Swardson), avoid exploding and woo Chet’s sister at the same time. Director Ruben Fleischer reunites with his Zombieland lead for a movie that is a little bit funnier and only slightly less madcap. Plus, Fred Freaking Ward! Check out Cole Abaius’ full review here. [The DVD includes a featurette.]

Cave of Forgotten Dreams

Pitch: “There seems to have existed a visual convention extending all the way beyond Baywatch.” Werner Herzog referring to an ancient figurine of a large bellied and large breasted woman…

Why Rent? Fifteen years ago a cave was discovered in the hills of France that changed everything we knew about cave paintings made by ancient peoples. The Chauvet Cave has since become a hot bed of research and study, and by hotbed I mean only a very select group of visitors are allowed in for a peek. The world famous Curious George narrator, Werner Herzog, was one of those lucky few, and with a small crew he looks into and beyond the cave’s history and meaning. The film captures much of the cave’s beauty and awe, and Herzog’s narration is occasionally a thing of beauty, but there’s not really enough here to justify the running time. It would have made a fantastic 45-minute short, but as it stands it’s a mildly interesting feature. [The DVD includes a short film and a trailer.]

Guilty of Romance (UK)

Pitch: No one is what they appear to be on the outside. Especially women apparently…

Why Rent? Izumi (Megumi Kagurazaka) leads a fairly sheltered life as the docile housewife to a famed romance novelist whose books are far more lively than his personality at home. An attempt at finding herself through a part-time job leads to a gig in porn, and soon she’s discovering more than she could have expected about herself inside and out. Running alongside her story is a murder investigation into a crime scene featuring body parts sewn together with mannequin pieces. Director Sion Sono mines some similar territory to his last film, Cold Fish, in this story that melds true crime with sexual exploration, and in the process he’s crafted a movie that alternates between beauty and real ugliness. [The DVD includes commentary and an interview.] **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Friends With Benefits

Pitch: Friends don’t let friends watch unfunny movies with lead actors who can’t act…

Why Avoid? Two sexy young people (Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake) who’ve recently been dumped by funnier actors (Andy Samberg and Emma Stone) decide they’re no longer interested in serious relationships and instead want one that’s focused on sex only. But if Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher have taught us anything it’s that such a thing is patently absurd. (Although it does work in real life if you choose your partner well enough.) This is a lesser version of No Strings Attached, which if you’ve seen that movie you know that is faint praise indeed. Timberlake is not a good actor, period, and he lessens every scene he’s in to the point where it’s more annoying than entertaining. Although at least he didn’t woose out and use a butt-double like Kunis. Check out Adam Charles’ full review here. Skip it and watch Fired Up! instead. [The DVD includes commentary, deleted scenes and outtakes.]

The Future

Pitch: Your future should not involve wasting time with this annoyance…

Why Avoid? A couple of hipsters rescue and adopt a cat, but it needs to spend a month at the vet’s before they can bring it home. They realize that in thirty days they’ll be forced to become responsible adults so they decide to take these four weeks to truly explore their last days of freedom. I haven’t seen writer/director/star Miranda July’s previous film, Me and You and Everyone We Know, but I hear it’s pretty fantastic. Of course, some people say the same thing about this movie. Skip it and watch Back to the Future instead. [The DVD includes commentary, a featurette, a deleted scene and a trailer.]

Needle

Pitch: What’s in the box? What’s in the box?!? Something stupid and occasionally gory…

Why Avoid? A college kid whose father died a few years prior receives the last part of his dad’s estate in the form of an elaborately constructed box. The his friends start dying in gory and violent ways. The script does a fine job of misdirection when it comes to the killer’s identity, but that doesn’t really matter when the characters and remainder of the script are uninteresting and illogical. The deaths do feature the occasional nice bit of gore though. Skip it and watch Hellraiser instead. [The DVD includes a featurette and a trailer.]

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

The Art of Getting By
Chillerama
One Day
The Smurfs

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

The Adventures of Tintin: Season One

Young Tintin is an intrepid reporter constantly on the trail of bad deeds and bad guys as he sets out to solve mysteries along with his dog Snowy and a group of oddball friends and acquaintances. This short-lived series from the early nineties is loosely based on the classic French creation (and shares some specific story elements with the upcoming movie). The adventures are entertaining and filled with action, and they feature elements that never talk down to kids including murder, drug smuggling, alcoholism and more. So yeah, it’s my kind of cartoon.

12 Angry Men (Criterion)

Pitch: Juries belong in movies, not in courtrooms…

Why Buy? Twelve men head into the jury room to deliberate the fate of a young ethnic man accused of killing his father. All but one of the jurors are already convinced of the man’s guilt, but #8 (Henry Fonda) thinks the matter is worth discussing and proceeds to work his way through the others. Sidney Lumet’s feature debut is probably one of the finest single-room films ever made, and it’s a veritable master class on acting and screenwriting. In addition to Fonda the film features several more memorable faces including Martin Balsam, Jack Klugman, EG Marshall, Lee J Cobb and Jack Warden. Check out Cole Abaius’ Old Ass Movies entry here.

Conan the Barbarian

Pitch: Guaranteed to be better on DVD thanks to the lack of 3-D…

Why Rent? Robert E Howard’s most famous character gets a reboot in Marcus Nispel’s gory, goofy, violent film starring Jason Momoa as the legendary Cimmerian warrior. This remake avoids the serious tone and artistic touches of the Arnold Schwarzenegger “classic” but still manages to entertain. Granted, that’s all it does and all it wants to do. The action is well choreographed, the women are often topless, and the comedy is occasionally on the nose. (That last one will make more sense once you’ve seen the movie.) It’s big, dumb entertainment. Check out my full review here.

The Devil’s Double

Pitch: It’s like The Parent Trap, only with dictators and murder and stuff…

Why Rent? Everyone knows Saddam Hussein employed body doubles, but less well known is the fact that at least one of his sons did too. This fact-based (but probably loose) film explores Uday’s forced employment of a man named Latif to be his double, and it stars Dominic Cooper in both roles. There’s a hint of the isolation and sadness that inhabits both men, but for the most part the film is focused on the action, terror and debauchery. The best thing about the film, aside from Cooper’s stellar performance, is the poster/DVD cover art. That said, it’s a fun enough watch that offers a glimpse into the mad world of a Middle Eastern dictator.

Marvel Knights: Collection

Pitch: For folks who like their comics to move…

Why Rent? The Marvel Knights animation series continues to find solid and engaging stories from the comic world and then bring them to life in atmospheric and polished motion comics. This set collects five of the series including Astonishing X-Men, Black Panther, Iron Man, Spider Woman and Thor & Loki, and they come from some of the best writers around including Joss Whedon, Warren Ellis, Brian Michael Bendis and more. The only real negative here is that for some reason the titles in the box set have been packaged in traditional DVD snap cases instead of the thin and stylish hard-paper cases they were originally released with. It makes for an unnecessarily bulky set.

Super 8

Pitch: Where’s my Super 8MM mash-up? Could be the world’s first snuff film with lens flare…

Why Rent? A group of kids unwittingly record evidence of “something” while making a movie on a Super 8 camera, and soon their small town finds itself ground zero in a battle between the military and this previously unknown visitor. Director/writer JJ Abrams has crafted two thirds of a good movie here, but he drops the ball in a third act filled with inane set pieces, logical gaps, and an unearned emotional ending. It’s easily the weakest of his three features so far, but in his quest to become Steven Spielberg he at least got the spectacle and precocious kids right. Check out Abaius’ full review here.

Conan the Adventurer: Season Two Part 1

Pitch: No gore and no nudity but plenty of cartoon action…

Why Avoid? Conan’s early nineties animated adventures see him traveling the world in search of a cure for his stoned family. See, they’ve been turned to stone. His nemesis, Wrath-Amon, is a reptilian baddie capable of magic and evil deeds. The series eliminates Conan’s historical penchant for violence and sex… it is a cartoon for kids after all, but that’s not the reason this is marked as an Avoid. This column has a long standing policy towards TV season releases done in parts… as in there’s no reason for them aside from simple cash grabs. Shout! Factory released season one in its entirety, and they’ll do the same with season two eventually. Wait for that. Skip it and watch Conan the Barbarian instead.

Haunted Changi

Pitch: “Boo” in any language is still “boo”…

Why Avoid? The old Changi Hospital in Singapore is reportedly haunted by the ghosts dead patients and war prisoners, and one group of young filmmakers is determined to discover if tehre’s any truth to the rumors. They head into the building hoping to make history, but fate and the undead may have different plans for them. We’ve seen this film before many times and usually done better. While it doesn’t really work for various reasons there is a certain appeal to seeing the topic explored by way of the country’s local history… just not enough of an appeal to recommend it. Check out my full review here. Skip it and watch Grave Encounters instead.

Helldriver

Pitch: See? I don’t give a pass to things simply because they feature attractive Asian women…

Why Avoid? Japan is a divided country as a wall separates humanity from zombies. Into this unfortunate world comes a girl betrayed by her mother and forced to confront the zombie problem in order to save herself and her people. Director Yoshihiro Nishimura is no stranger to over the top comedic gore fests, but his latest is almost a complete misstep. For one thing, a movie filled with this much blood and violence shouldn’t be so goddamn boring and drawn out. The story is convoluted, the characters are far from engaging, and teh tone is unpleasant at best. The third act does feature something pretty damn cool though straight out of a Clive Barker short story (“In the Hills the Cities” in particular), but it isn’t enough to save the movie. Check out Abaius’ full review here. Skip it and watch Tokyo Gore Police instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Antfarm Dickhole
The Family Tree
The Green
Moist Fury
Sarah’s Key

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Three Colors: Blue White Red (Criterion)

Krzysztof Kieslowski’s thematic trilogy looks at France’s motto: Liberty, Equality, Fraternity. Blue stars Juliette Binoche as a woman who suffers a terrible loss and attempts to free herself from life and its responsibilities with a kind of slow-motion suicide, but she instead finds true freedom through healing. Red features Irene Jacob as a young woman whose solitude is slowly shattered by unexpected friendships. And I have no clue what White is about. I haven’t even seen Criterion’s new set yet, but even a Criterion release of just Blue and Red would warrant an automatic purchase.

Metropolis Special Edition

Pitch: When you think Fritz Lang, you will think Adam Ant…

Why Buy? Fritz Lang’s 1927 classic seems more than a little timely today. It features a world divided in two with the oppressed workers down below and the wealthy 1% living a carefree existence above. One man leaves the surface to go looking for a woman he glimpsed amidst the commoners and finds love as well as a cause. In 1984 composer Giorgio Moroder oversaw a new edition of the film complete with superficial changes alongside a major overhaul to the soundtrack. Loverboy, Bonnie Tyler, Pat Benetar, and more are used to dramatic effect, and while their tunes may not feel timeless Lang’s film most certainly is.

Beginners

Pitch: “Is the chair gay?” “No, the chair’s not gay…”

Why Rent? Oliver (Ewan McGregor) meets the possible love of his life (Melanie Laurent) mere months after his father (Christopher Plummer) passed away which itself was mere months after his father announced he was gay. He reflects back on his childhood and the last year while struggling to move forward with his own life. Writer/director Mike Mills’ film is at times sweet and funny, and it’s very well intentioned but a slow pace and disjointed editing keep it from being a better movie. Although the rewrite of Christ’s death is an inspired gag. Plus, you know, Melanie Laurent. Check out Luke Mullen’s full review here.

Bellflower

Pitch: Two friends one car…

Why Rent? Woodrow (writer/director Evan Glodell) and Aiden (Tyler Dawson) are slackers in their professional lives but industrious in their free time as they imagine, design and build flame throwers and a souped up muscle car suitable for the Australian Outback. When Woodrow meets the messed up love of his life things take a turn for the ridiculously dramatic, and he’s forced to let out his inner Humongous. There’s quite a bit to like about this indie film, but unfortunately Glodell’s acting gets in the way of a lot of it. He whines his way through scenes that should have been endearing, but luckily Dawson makes up for it with charisma and charm as the best friend who stays true through the ups and downs of a made up apocalypse. Glodell’s strengths are evident in the look and feel of the film, so hopefully he won’t feel compelled to cast himself as the lead next time around. Check out Adam Charles’ full review here.

Deadly Blessing (UK)

Pitch: The star of Battlestar Galactica! The star of Fall Guy! The star of Knot’s Landing! And that woman who spread her legs in Basic Instinct…

Why Rent? A young couple trying to make it as farmers in Amish country run afoul of the local Hittite community headed up by Ernest Borgnine. They view the wife as an incubus, and when the husband dies in a mysterious accident things begin to get weird for all involved. And by weird I mean people start dying in violent ways. This early effort from Wes Craven manages some decent scares and creepy scenes as well as an ending that would be stolen by Sam Raimi years later. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Griff the Invisible

Pitch: We all have an Australian superhero inside of us…

Why Rent? Ryan Kwanten plays a sweet, mild mannered young man who spends his nights fighting crime. Maybe. His elaborate world threatens to come crashing down when he meets the equally quirky love of his life who just happens to be dating his cocky and far more successful brother. This is probably the best of the “real person plays superhero” subgenre since John Ritter donned tights for Hero at Large, and credit for that is due evenly between the actors and writer/director Leon Ford. Check out my full review here.

Red vs Blue: Season 9

Pitch: The longest running machinima series ever. It’s like The Simpson’s of game engine cinema…

Why Rent? The latest season of Red vs Blue is a prequel of sorts as it moves from the past to the future of the Blood Gulch universe with a story about military intelligence gone awry. As usual, hilarity ensues. The Halo series has had a long life in the gaming community, but when Master Chief’s adventures first premiered no one could have expected a comedy series made by fans using the in-game engine would run equally as long. This is good stuff, and I could easily see it airing on FX paired up with Archer.

Rio Sex Comedy

Pitch: It’s not just a title, it’s the order in which the three things can be found in the movie. Lots of Rio, a solid amount of sex, and very little comedy…

Why Rent? Multiple storylines and characters run through this film about people falling in love, having sex, and discussing class distinctions throughout the favelas of Rio de Janeiro. Bill Pullman plays a US Ambassador looking for social change, Charlotte Rampling plays a plastic surgeon questioning people’s desire, and Daniela Dams just looks fantastic as a frequently nude Native Indian in a relationship with Fischer Stevens. Yeah, I can’t explain that last part either. It’s an odd film in that a good third of it is focused on class differences and the real life dramas of the city’s lower class. That’s not a bad thing, but it makes the title a bit inappropriate and misleading.

The Warring States

Pitch: They’re not called feudal times for nothing…

Why Rent? A great military strategist named Sun Bin is lured down from the mountains to assist on the field of battle, but when his brother, Pang Juan, wants in on the action he sets Bin up and sends the man to prison. Bin eventually gets out and returns to planning combat maneuvers, and soon the two brothers are going head to head for the last time. Period epics have become their own mini-genre in Asian cinema, and what this one lacks in star power it makes up for in scale and beauty. There’s a bit too much CGI used in the wide shots, but it’s balanced with practical blood work.

What Women Want (Hong Kong remake)

Pitch: Andy Lau is a respectable replacement for Mel Gibson, but Gong Li in the Helen Hunt role? Hell yes…

Why Rent? An ad exec (Andy Lau) expecting a promotion is disgusted to learn that a female new hire (Gong Li) has gotten it instead, but when an unexpected congruence of electrical shock and birth control pills gives him the ability to hear women’s thoughts he turns the tables on his feminine competition. This Hong Kong remake of the Nancy Meyers “classic” follows the original fairly closely but lacks much in the way of real laughs. Still, Li wears a lot of cleavage-baring blouses so there’s that.

Assassin’s Creed: Lineage

Pitch: Curious what bland actors look like in front of CGI and green-screened backdrops? Wonder no more…

Why Avoid? The Duke of Milan has been murdered, and the plot behind his killing can only be unraveled by the inventor of parkour, Giovanni Auditore (aka the father of the main character from the Assassin’s Creed video games). The games are tons of fun, something sorely missing from this miniseries. The characters are far from engaging and the story is a bit convoluted, but the biggest problem is that the majority of scenes feature CGI backdrops suitable for a game but not a movie. They distract from the live actors and destroy the film’s already paltry atmosphere. Skip it and watch The Name of the Rose instead.

The Open Door

Pitch: Shut it as soon as you can…

Why Avoid? Every month during the full moon a group of people commit murder and/or suicide, and this month it’s a gaggle of the most annoying goddamn teenagers you’ve ever seen. This direct to DVD horror flick opens with an intriguing scene and premise, but it then devotes almost a full hour to these teenagers acting like assholes and the lead heroine listening to a talk radio program that may be behind the killings while nothing of any interest happens. The horror action doesn’t start until the final twenty minutes, and if ever there was a case of too little too late it’s this thing. Skip it and watch The Amityville Horror instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Being Human: The Complete First Season
The Drummond Will
It Takes a Thief: The Complete Series
Larry Crowne
Main Street
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Rules of the Game (Criterion)
The Tree

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Little Big Man (Blu-ray)

Yes, this week’s pick is a bit of a cheat seeing as it’s a Blu-ray and not a DVD, but none of today’s DVD releases really deserved the honor. Arthur Penn’s 1970 classic however, does, and one viewing will show you why. Dustin Hoffman stars as an old man named Jack Crabb who reflects on his life with tales of action, drama, and absurd comedy. He was abducted and raised by the Cheyenne from the age of 10 before being “rescued” by US soldiers six years later and later went on to cross paths with Wild Bill Hickok and General Custer. The film is an emotional ride at times but rarely strays from the laughs for long as it uses crimes and fictions from the past to scrutinize crimes and facts of the then present (Vietnam War). It’s almost like Forrest Gump with real heart and character instead of platitudes and CGI. The new Blu doesn’t offer much in the way of extras, but the picture looks fantastic and the film holds up well as both a comedy and a western.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

Pitch: The boy who lived finally dies. Or does he? Probably. Or not…

Why Buy? The eighth blockbuster film in the bestselling seven-book series brings JK Rowling’s epic story to its end as Harry Potter and Voldemort’s dueling destinies finally face off against each one last time. Like any series the Harry Potter films have varied in quality and emotional power, but while this final installment isn’t the best it’s still quite strong. The drama of the story and the weight of the relationships in and around Harry’s life are tangible and rewarding, and they make up for any small issues the film may otherwise exhibit.

Dragon’s Lair: The Complete Series

Pitch: The adventures of Dirk Diggler and his broad sword…

Why Rent? Dirk the Daring is on a quest to save the beautiful Princess Daphne from the reptilian scourge Singe, a dragon with immense strength and fire breathing capabilities, and only you can help him! Everyone knows that movies based on videogames are almost always pretty crappy, but the art of adapting a game wasn’t always a losing prospect. This short-lived cartoon series is based on Don Bluth’s 1983 blockbuster arcade game of the same name. The game used cutting edge laser disc technology to display stunning hand-drawn animation instead of the usual videogame sprites, and the TV show matches the game’s style and spirit frame for frame. It’s good, goofy fun from when Saturday morning cartoons were actually worth watching.

Five Minarets in New York (UK)

Pitch: Did you know that not all Muslims are terrorists, but all Americans are assholes? Of course you did…

Why Rent? Two Turkish policemen come to New York City in search of a Muslim suspected of terrorist acts and involvement with an upcoming attack. They arrive in NYC and are quickly become embroiled with a belligerent FBI agent named Becker (Robert Patrick), an American Muslim (Danny Glover) trying to protect their target, and the supposed terrorist’s wife (Gina Gershon). This Turkish production opens with a strong gun fight before settling into a more dramatic story about suspicion, stereotype, and the evil Americans. It’s that last one that holds the movie back quite a bit, but it still manages to offer some fresh insight into the topic. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Life In a Day

Pitch: The unsung heroes of YouTube have finally found a home…

Why Rent? July 24th, 2010, was just like any other day around the world in most ways. People woke up, lived their lives, and went back to sleep. But on this day in particular thousands of those very same people set out to document their existence on video and then submit them to directors Kevin Macdonald and Natalia Andreadis who had the unenviable task of combing through them all. The result is a film that works its way through the day and around the globe by way of glimpses into everyday people’s lives. Much of it is mundane, but the film features more than a few scenes and images that will lift your spirits and or break your heart.

Panic Button (UK)

Pitch: Congrats on winning! Your prize is death…

Why Rent? A group of contest winners board a plane bound for the US but quickly discover their presence has been orchestrated with murder in mind. This is in essence a single room thriller, and for the most part it works. The setup and plot revelations are pretty solid and features some original twists and turns. Unfortunately the third act can’t maintain the freshness or suspense as it descends into a very familiar denouement. Still, it’s always exciting to see a movie attempt to build mystery and drama in such a confined space. Fans of another UK thriller, Exam, should give it a chance. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

The Sleeping Beauty

Pitch: Fairy tales about children aren’t always for children…

Why Rent? A young girl’s life becomes fodder for witch play after her mother is the subject of competing spells and curses in their magical kingdom. The child winds up living through a series of dreams including one in the modern world as a teenager where she discovers love and a life of her own. Director Catherine Breillat is known for her provocative and sometimes explicit films, but while this one features nudity and a sensuous sensibility it still feels like a storybook fable brought to life. It may also be Breillat’s most accessible movie to date.

Thankskilling

Pitch: “Warning! Tits in the first second!” That cover claim is actually a lie. It takes 35 seconds…

Why Rent? The true story of the first Thanksgiving comes to light in this ultra low budget horror re-release about a murderous turkey prone to one-liners like “You just got stuffed!” Yes, it’s pretty much as bad as you’d expect complete with laughable acting and effects. But, surprisingly, it manages its own brand of cheap charm. CGI blood mars some otherwise enjoyable gore, and some of the gags actually warrant a laugh including a riff on Leatherface that earns laughs for its absurdity and execution. Just don’t go in expecting anything that resembles a professional film.

Twelve Thirty

Pitch: “Why do you need a tissue?” “To wipe my vagina…”

Why Rent? A twenty-something with issues (Jonathan Groff) somehow manages to woo his way into the vaginas of an equally issue-filled family. Writer/director Jeff Lipsky’s film is written like a play as very little happens but quite a bit is discussed. Some of the dialogue feels false in its delivery and import, but even when it doesn’t ring true it still teases interesting entertainment. The first act is helped by the absolutely adorable Portia Reiners who appears quite nude and incredibly charming. It’s an indie movie, and feels like it, but fans of stage dialogue and beautiful naked women may want to give it a rent.

Nothing worth avoiding this week! Viva Brazil!

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

13
Atlas Shrugged: Part One
The Change-Up

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

The Adventures of Mark Twain (UK)

“Naked people have little to no influence in this society.” So says the always wise and wonderful Mark Twain as captured in clay in this funny and whimsical claymation adventure. The film mixes bits and pieces of several of Twain’s works, short and long, into an adventure that sees Tom Sawyer, Huck Finn, and Becky Thatcher join Mr Samuel Clemens himself on a steam powered airship across the sky. Twain is hoping to find Halley’s Comet so he can end his life in its flames, but the children attempt to convince him that he still has much to offer mankind and that mankind has much to offer him. Fanciful visuals and eminently quotable observations from Twain’s writing make this a fun film that speaks to kids as well as adults. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Crazy Stupid Love

Pitch: Funny funny funny…

Why Buy? Cal (Steve Carell) discovers that his wife (Julianne Moore) had an affair and soon finds himself a newly minted bachelor. His efforts on the singles scene mark him as an amateur and quickly get him noticed by a playboy named Jacob (Ryan Gosling) who takes him under his perfectly toned wing to turn him into a proper player. Emma Stone is also thrown into the mix as a young woman dealing with her own relationship foibles. This film from the directors of I Love You Phillip Morris got a mixed reaction in theaters, but I personally found it incredibly funny from beginning to (highly contrived) end. Everyone does a great job here, but special mention goes to Gosling who turns in the most entertaining performance of his career.

Black Moon Rising

Pitch: Written by John Carpenter! Kind of…

Why Rent? A thief (Tommy Lee Jones) is forced by the FBI to steal some information, but when he’s almost captured he hides the data in a super cool prototype car called Black Moon. Things get even more complicated when another thief, a much hotter thief (Linda Hamilton), steals the car. Carpenter didn’t direct this mid-eighties effort, but it’s still a fun piece of cheesy action (even though little of his original story remains). There are a handful of fight scenes and car chases, and while neither are done exceptionally well they’re still entertaining enough. Fans who consider themselves Carpenter completists will want to check it out as will fans of Hamilton’s boobs.

Bunraku

Pitch: The original title was Bukkake until the writers discovered that nonsense word was already taken…

Why Rent? Future society has attempted to stamp out increasing global violence by outlawing guns and projectile weapons of all kinds. In their place grows a more honorable system of fisticuffs, swordplay, and paper mache storytelling. Two strangers (Josh Hartnett and Gackt) enter a small town and reluctantly join forces to bring down the big baddie (Ron Perlman) who’s been making everyone’s life miserable. Guy Moshe’s film is a highly stylized western that takes some getting used to but eventually finds its own rhythms and strengths. The acting from the leads as well as Woody Harrelson, Demi Moore, Kevin McKidd, and others is equally non-naturalistic, but it suits the style and format the film is using. If nothing else the film is visually stimulating enough to warrant a watch.

Californication: The Fourth Season

Pitch: Fourth verse, same as the first! Well, same as the second anyway…

Why Rent? Hank Moody (David Duchovny) continues his booze and babe-filled journey through life trying to balance his much desired home life with wife and daughter against his unquenchable ego and libido. The fourth season sees Hank facing his day in court over the unintentional statutory rape charge that occurred in the first episode of the first season. The series continues to be raunchy and funny in equal measure, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit it’s lost some of its heart along the way. Still, Duchovny is always worth watching.

Hot Coffee

Pitch: So you’re saying I shouldn’t put a paper cup filled with scalding hot coffee between my legs while driving? I’m sorry, I thought this was America…

Why Rent? Remember the woman who burned her thighs with McDonald’s coffee she got from a drive-thru who then sued the fast food chain and won millions of dollars? Well it turns out that what you remember is only part of the truth, and how big or small of a part may just surprise you. Director Susan Saladoff’s film looks at this case and three others that have been deemed by many as frivolous attempts to squeeze corporations for money. It goes a bit too far at times in diminishing personal responsibility, but it also sheds a much needed light on the real crime here… the reduction and elimination of our rights as citizens in the face of big business.

The Last Mountain

Pitch: Fails to answer the question as to which Baldwin brother Robert F Kennedy Jr. is equivalent to…

Why Rent? The Appalachian mountains of West Virginia are the setting for this documentary that pits activists and residents against the powers of large coal companies wanting to blow up mountain tops in search of the black stuff. The resulting damage to the environment, streams, and surrounding wildlife becomes a point of contention when weighed against the prospect of jobs and the potential profits to be made. Like Hot Coffee above, this doc takes a clear stand on the side of the little guy while at the same time showing how fruitless a position that can ultimately be.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan

Pitch: They’re sisters from different misters…

Why Rent? Two friends who’ve grown apart in modern day Shanghai experience a tragedy that leads one to reflect on a similar bond between two other sworn sisters who lived centuries before. Wayne Wang brings this tale to the screen with the same skill and honest affection he applied towards The Joy Luck Club, although this film may not resonate as strongly with some viewers. The story is less about family than it is about friendships and bonds that feel just as strong as ones of blood. It’s fairly bleak at times, but the ending (and a cameo from a certain Australian actor) make it worth a watch for fans of chick flicks, foot binding, and/or solid relationship dramas.

Tabloid

Pitch: Love comes in all shapes, sizes, and degrees of insanity…

Why Rent? Director Errol Morris delivers a documentary about obsession, love, and bondage, and does it all with humor and mentally deranged heart. Joyce McKinney was a former beauty queen contestant who fell madly in love with a Mormon man and followed him across the Atlantic Ocean. Where she promptly kidnapped him, raped him, and set him free. Or not. Her story gets weirder and weirder as it goes on, and McKinney’s present day interview segments prove that the unpredictable wackiness hasn’t worn off over the decades. The truth is hard to pin down, but the entertainment value is on display for all to see and enjoy.

Trespass

Pitch: Directed by Joel Schumacher! Starring Nicolas Cage and Nicole Kidman! Straight to DVD! Oh, wait…

Why Rent? Kyle and Sarah Miller (Cage and Kidman) seem to have a perfect relationship, but beneath the surface they have more than a few issues. Four more problems walk into their lives in the form of a quartet of home invaders after diamonds and cash in Kyle’s safe, but the evening isn’t about to go according to plan for anyone involved. Cage gives a muted performance here in comparison to many of his recent ones, but he does give an occasional glimpse into nasal craziness. The twists and turns are often predictable, but there are some solidly entertaining bits and the presence of Ben Mendelsohn (Animal Kingdom) as one of the burglars can’t hurt either. Far worse movies make it into theaters every week, so it’s anyone’s guess why this one went straight to DVD.

Cars 2

Pitch: This is what a billion dollars in merchandising profits gets you…

Why Avoid? Owen Wilson’s Lightning McQueen takes backseat to Larry the Cable Guy’s Mater in this mix of race cars, spy vs spy action, and utter stupidity. I haven’t seen the first film, so I can’t speak to this being better or worse, but aside from a pretty stellar and exciting opening scene this movie is an unfunny and boring dud. Wilson’s no charisma giant, but he’s sorely missed here as he’s relegated to second fiddle behind Larry’s ignorant redneck of a truck. Skip it and check out Ronin instead. Or A Bug’s Life.

An Invisible Sign

Pitch: It’s Honey meets A Beautiful Mind! Well, you’ll wish it was anyway…

Why Avoid? A young girl’s childhood is emotionally stunted when her father has a stroke (or something resembling a stroke). She gives up everything that makes her happy and grows up to become Jessica Alba with bangs. This well intentioned but ultimately misguided and miscast effort sees Alba as an introverted (and occasionally mentally challenged it seems) woman who becomes a teacher who discovers her love of math can overcome any obstacle. Or something. It’s not good. And while I consider myself an Alba fan even I’ll acknowledge that dowdy and sincere are not her strong points. Chris Messina and JK Simmons add some charisma to this otherwise lackluster tale. Skip it and check out Idle Hands instead.

Victorious: Season One Volume Two

Pitch: You shouldn’t do that on television DVDs…

Why Avoid? A school for the arts in Los Angeles is home to an oddball group of cool kids and good friends. There’s also a kid with a puppet. Regardless of the quality of this show it’s the policy of this column not to support such clear, obvious and unnecessary money grabs as this. A TV season is easily released in its entirety, but Nickelodeon insists on putting out their shows piecemeal in an effort to maximize profit. Seasons are split into two three releases… the first half, the second half, and the whole thing. Even the far superior iCarly went this route, and those too are releases worth avoiding. That said, Victorious is a lackluster and unfunny show. Skip it and check out any full season of iCarly instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and/or I have no blind opinion:

Water for Elephants

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

The Ballad of Narayama (UK)

A small village in the Japanese mountains is the setting for this rumination on life, death and family that plays like the movie The Tree of Life should have been but with a narrative instead of dinosaurs. Village law dictates you head up the mountain to die at the age of seventy, and as Orin approaches that milestone she rushes around trying to set her children straight to ensure their future. The film is a harsh look at a time and place, and it uses images of animals alongside the characters to highlight our own innate nature. As cruel as it seems though the film ends up being as uplifting an ode to humanity as you could imagine or want. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Attack the Block

Pitch: It’s Gremlins meets NEDS…

Why Buy? Not every alien invasion hits the USA first as evidenced in this fun, exciting, and surprising little gem from the UK. A group of teen thugs in a London housing project (or equivalent thereof) are witness to several vicious creatures falling from the sky and terrorizing the neighborhood. Joe Cornish’s film is a throwback of the best kind and manages to be both frightening and funny throughout. If you failed to seek this one out during its limited theatrical run this summer here’s your chance to see what the blogosphere has been raving about since SXSW. Check out Brian Salisbury’s full review here.

Captain America: The First Avenger

Pitch: Best comic book movie of the year? Maybe. Definitely the most entertaining…

A scrawny Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) undergoes an experiment that turns him into a buff Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), and he quickly becomes our secret weapon against a grand Nazi conspiracy. Director Joe Johnston redeems himself for the disaster that was The Wolfman with this entertaining as hell superhero film that exudes personality and charm alongside large-scale action and adventure. The story even squeezes in a degree of heart and pathos to a character that risked feeling too goody goody and bland, and that’s due as much to Evans’ performance as it is to the bittersweet love story. Check out Neil Miller’s full review here.

City of Life and Death

Pitch: It’s the least entertaining film on this list! And a definite must-see…

Why Buy? From my review last year: “The temptation to close your eyes while watching City of Life and Death is strong. War films and the depiction of atrocities committed are nothing new, but they’re most often seen as small parts of a whole. This film forgoes that kindness in favor of making the atrocities committed in Nanking, China starting in the last month of 1937 the center piece. It’s not meant to be an entertaining or easy watch and it’s extremely difficult at times to endure, but as an accurate portrayal into one of mankind’s many unfavorable chapters it’s a painfully essential viewing experience.” It’s beautiful and heart-wrenching in equal measure, and honestly it should be shown in schools. Check out my full review here.

Jurassic Park Ultimate Trilogy

Pitch: One of the best blockbusters of all time. And two other dinosaur movies…

Why Buy? What happens when Santa Claus (Sir Richard Attenborough) grows tired of the Christmas game and gets into the theme park business? Mother frickin dinosaurs happen, that’s what. Sam Neill and Laura Dern play paleontologists asked to check out a new island theme park populated with living breathing dinosaurs, but when bad weather, technical malfunction, and human greed join the equation the vacation weekend turns into a reptilian nightmare… and one hell of an entertaining movie. Steven Spielberg’s blockbuster is still as fun, exciting, and flat out entertaining today as it was in 1993. The DVD is jam packed with extras too both old and brand new. The two sequels are also included in this set.

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale

Pitch: American children have it easy when it comes to what we teach them about Santa Claus. Finnish kids, not so much…

Why Buy?  This odd and exciting little family adventure is about a small village that finds the legendary but very real Santa Claus during an excavation. The downside is that their dig also catches the attention of the big man’s angry, elderly, and extremely naked elves. That’s right. It’s a family film filled with copious amounts of old man dick. It’s also creative, entertaining, and a sweet load of fun. And as a side note you have until this Friday to enter to win a free copy. Check out Cole Abaius’ full review here.

Robot Chicken: Season Five

Pitch: Pop culture gets the treatment it deserves…

Why Buy? Cartoon Network’s most popular show returns for a fifth season of wildly inappropriate (and often inconsistent) stop motion sketch comedy. Some of the best bits of the season include a Smurf/Avatar mashup, a bit featuring Strawberry Shortcake and Bitch Pudding, a Muppet murder conspiracy, and a Charlie Brown/Footloose mashup. The season is hitting DVD before it begins airing on TV too, but since the discs include a metric ton of extras including deleted scenes, behind the scenes, commentaries and more it may still take a few months to get through it all.

Shaolin

Pitch: Remember when Jackie Chan used to star in good movies? He still does, you just have to know where to look…

Why Buy? Andy Lau plays a ruthless and murderous Chinese warlord who’s betrayed by his underlings in an attack that leaves his child dead. He retreats in shame and sorrow to the safety of a monastery where he learns to be a better man from the monks and the cook (Jackie Chan). Director Benny Chan’s film features a strong central story, fantastic action scenes, and real heart in Lau’s relationship with his distraught wife. Check out my full review here.

Atrocious

Pitch: Atrocious title. Good movie…

Why Rent? A family heads to an old mansion in Sitges and soon discovers all is not right in the backyard garden maze. This found footage horror film from Spain isn’t up to the high standards of its sister films Rec and Rec 2, but it still has its fair share of scares. Most of the film follows the usual path of the genre, but the third act takes some fresh and creative turns with a resolution that surprises and thrills. But seriously, the title is atrocious. Check out my full review here.

Fire of Conscience

Pitch: It burns…

Why Rent? Dante Lam directs this twisted action thriller about a cop out to solve a murder, and by ‘twisted’ I mean convoluted. But if the storyline is occasionally easy to get lost in the fantastic action scenes and visual style more than makes up for it. What is clear is that the story revolves around two cops, a killer, and a high degree of police corruption. Lam is on a pretty solid roll here with his recent films including The Stool Pigeon, The Sniper, and The Beast Stalker, and this string of hits should make action fans excited for his upcoming film, The Viral Factor. Check out Adam Charles’ full review here.

Lethal Ladies (Roger Corman’s Cult Classics)

Pitch: It’s a three-fer of high-kicking mayhem…

Why Rent? Three movies make up this collection of New World Pictures classics including Firecracker, TNT Jackson, and Too Hot to Handle. The first sees a female martial artist head to the Philippines to look for her missing sister, and it features two hilarious stripteases (of sorts) as well as a ton of fun (albeit poorly choreographed) fights scenes. The next sees a female martial artist head to the Hong Kong to look for her missing brother, but sadly there’s only one humorously nude fight scene. The final film is the weakest of the three and not really worth the watch. It’s not fun or entertaining and suffers from a terribly uncharismatic lead.

A Little Help

Pitch: The secret life of Pam from The Office…

Why Rent? Jenna Fischer plays a frustrated wife and mother of one who discovers her husband (Chris O’Donnell) is cheating on her. And then he dies. Her son, in a confused and desperate bid for attention, claims his dad died in 9/11 instead of coitus, and the ramifications place a heavy stress on the characters. The film as a whole has some issues, but Fischer’s funny and heartfelt performance makes it worth a watch. Check out my full review here.

Luther 2

Pitch: You can always use more Idris Elba in your life…

Why Rent? Idris Elba returns for a second season of this British cop drama as Detective Inspector John Luther, a highly unconventional officer of the law who often finds himself in sticky situations. Season two isn’t as good as the first, the events don’t quite pack the same surprising and powerful punch, but it’s still a lot of fun and anchored by another stellar performance from Elba. It picks up shortly after the cliffhanger ending of last season but lacks as dramatic an overarching storyline of its own.

A Man Vanishes (UK)

Pitch: It’s like a far less funny This Is Spinal Tap without music, British accents, or a dial that goes all the way to eleven…

Why Rent? This 1967 film from the director of the oddly magical Warm Water Under a Red Bridge begins as a straight-forward documentary about a missing salesman but slowly transforms into something else entirely. It’s played quite straight and seemingly flat as the details amount to a messy but otherwise normal life for the missing man, but the tone starts to shift along with the relationships onscreen and soon the film’s true intent comes clear. It’s an interesting precursor to more familiar faux documentaries and deserves a watch. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Pearl Jam Twenty

Pitch: D’you know that the human head weighs twenty pounds…

Why Rent? There aren’t very many bands whose public history can be traced through the memories of my own life, but Pearl Jam is one of them for me. I wasn’t in on the Green River love, but my awareness of Mother Love Bone gave me an early heads-up into Pearl Jam’s arrival on the scene, and I’ve been a fan since. Cameron Crowe’s doc is an intimate, electric and often fascinating look at their twenty year history filled with interviews and backstage footage, and it hits the band’s major highlights including their foray into music videos, their fight with Ticketmaster, and more. But it’s the unexpected bits that really showcase the raw power behind their music (and music in general). The best moment sees front-man Eddie Vedder strumming the opening chords of Better Man to a stadium-sized crowd, but just as he starts to sing the audience joins in and he lets the crowd of thousands finish it in unison.

Peter Gabriel: New Blood – Live In London

Pitch: One question. Do you need… a concert film or do you need this one? Forget it, I don’t really care…

Why Rent? Haven’t seen this one yet, but as a big Peter Gabriel fan and someone who’s seen him in concert a few times it’s one I’m looking forward to. The New Blood album sees a reinterpretation of several of Gabriel’s past songs including Red Rain, Wallflower, and In Your Eyes done without guitar or drums. The songs are recorded with a 46-piece orchestra and sometimes manage to sound even more impressive. A complete track list and song sampler can be found at Gabriel’s official site here.

Revenge of the Cheerleaders (UK)

Pitch: Kind of like saying Revenge of the White Males isn’t it? Cheerleaders get everything…

Why Rent? A group of multi-ethnic cheerleaders from Aloha High battle with the students of rival school Lincoln High, the threat of a new morality code at school, and their constant need for sexual gratification. thankfully for us they lose their fight against that last one. This raunchy flick from the seventies is cheap, but it manages something few films in the genre can… it’s actually funny and sexy. Plus, if nothing else, it features a young David Hasselhoff showing off his acting skills, dance moves, and dong as Boner. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

A Serbian Film

Pitch: I don’t think that counts as an orifice…

Why Rent? A retired porn star gets an offer for a very lucrative and unusual gig, but he discovers too late that the price may outweigh the payday. This is probably the most controversial film of the past few years, and it’s easy to see why once you’ve seen it… unless you’ve only watched this cut version. It heavily edits two key scenes, making one unintelligible and the other a bit more subtle, but it retains most of the other blackly comic, over the top extremes. Even cut, this version features some hardcore violence meshed deeply with explicit sex acts, so beware. Check out Landon Palmer’s full review here.

Smiley’s People

Pitch: Call me crazy, but I think Gary Oldman would make a fantastic George Smiley…

Why Rent? Haven’t seen this one yet, but it’s John Le Carré’s followup to Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy and both the BBC and Alec Guiness have returned for a second go round. George Smiley is called to action yet again when an old Russian informant is murdered shortly after getting Smiley a message. It seems the most elusive Soviet spy of Smiley’s career is back as well. This miniseries comes three years after its predecessor and features an early appearance by Patrick Stewart.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Pitch: See the miniseries before you see the movie! But after you read the book…

Why Rent? George Smiley(Alec Guiness), an aging British agent unceremoniously sacked a few years prior, is called back to action when the British Secret Intelligence Service suspects a mole has infiltrated the highest levels of their office. Smiley is tasked with rooting out the double agent, but his investigation takes some dangerous and surprising turns. This BBC miniseries from 1979 offers John Le Carré’s novel a broad and expansive canvas to tell its densely intricate story, and Guiness anchors it all with a performance that exudes authority and pathos in equal measure.

Tokyo Decadence (UK)

Pitch: “What a trip! I saw a vision of my dead mother and I fucked her good. She was great…”

Why Rent? A young woman goes about her perfectly normal day before heading to an appointment at a hotel… where she proceeds to be humiliated by her client for three straight hours. The session ends with the man telling her that she should never doubt her talents. Ryu Murakami’s film makes minor detours, but the main focus is on her sessions as an S&M play thing. The film is quite graphic visually and even more so in its dialogue, but it has a certain seedy appeal for fans of lifestyles they’ll never get to experience first hand. I’m not really a fan but I do have an ex-girlfriend in the business, so I’m fascinated for completely different reasons. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

The Devil’s Kiss (UK)

Pitch: Boobs, bush and bodies do not a good movie make…

Why Avoid? A woman sets out for revenge against the people she believes drove her husband to suicide, but things get complicated by the arrival of a tall dwarf, a Frankenstein-like creation, and lots of nudity. Okay, the nudity doesn’t so much complicate things as spice it up a bit. But it’s not nearly enough to make this messy and unconvincing horror film a shot. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Barney Miller: The Complete Series
Faces In the Crowd
Father Of Invention
The House By the Cemetery
Identification Of a Woman (Criterion)
Island Of Lost Souls (Criterion)
It Takes a Thief: The Complete Series
The People vs George Lucas
Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Aftershock

China’s Tangshan earthquake killed 240,000 people in 1976, and from that disaster comes this affecting and emotionally powerful tale of loss, guilt, and forgiveness. A building collapse traps two twins, a boy and a girl, beneath a concrete slab. Saving one means killing the other, and their mother is forced with making a heart-wrenching choice… “Save my son.” Unbeknownst to her though, the little girl survives and never forget her mother’s words. Now thirty years later a second earthquake draws that adult daughter back to China to help the victims and confront the mother who left her for dead. The film skips what would have been a couple of truly powerful emotional scenes (although it’s evident why), but it makes up for it with an incredibly strong ending that may or may not have moistened my eyes substantially. But good luck proving that.

The Last Circus

Pitch: Goddammit. Now the clowns have guns…

Why Buy? The Spanish Civil War was home to many strange and brutal sights, but none were as frightening what’s on display here including a clown slicing up the enemy with a machete. Years later his son has become a sad clown of his own and joins a circus where he falls in love with a beautiful but abused acrobat. Her abuser? Another clown. And the stage is set for a fantastical battle between two demented men with painted faces in a film about obsession, madness, and the sacred responsibilities of clownhood. Check out Cole Abaius’ full review here.

Grave Encounters

Pitch: It’s a title with double meaning! And ghosts…

Why Rent? Lance Preston and the crew of his ghost hunting TV show arrive at the Collingwood Psychiatric Hospital to to spend the night in the supposedly haunted building for one of their latest episodes. Of course, it may just be their last! Spooky right? This found footage film does a pretty good job of being both entertaining and frightening. At least until the third act when it goes a little too nuts. Unlike many horror films this one also manages to fit in more than a few laughs, and it bodes well for future terrors from The Vicious Brothers.

The Names of Love

Pitch: Those names are Arthur and Baya apparently…

Why Rent? Arthur (Jacques Gamblin) is a scientist in a suit who one day crosses paths with a spitfire liberal named Baya (Sara Forestier). Her shtick is to identify conservative looking guys and sleep with them in an effort to swing their political views. Forestier is a beautiful and sexy woman prone to walking around nude, and she’d probably be the only viable reason for voting for Michelle Bachmann. (Kidding.) (Not really.) The story takes a bit of time to find its rhythm, but once it does it becomes a sweet and sexy little comedy that pokes some strong jabs at politics and class.

Page One: Inside The New York Times

Pitch: The doc refers to the NYT as “too big to fail…”

Why Rent? Director Andrew Rossi gained unprecedented access behind the scenes of The New York Times, and his cameras captured a fascinating world that few people ever really see. From the personalities who work at the paper as writers, editors, and more, to the decisions made by these people on a daily basis… this is is an engaging and interesting exploration of a dinosaur of what may very well be a fading environment.

Robotech: The Complete Original Series

Pitch: I like to think of it as Starblazers meets Transformers…

Why Rent? Aliens invade the Earth, and mankind unites together to fight back using the creatures own technology. This box set collects the three series that make up the entire Robotech story which means 85 episodes spread across 17 discs. As one of the earliest animes to hit American TV it can look a bit rough at times, but the story still engages through plenty of action and drama. Of course, as dubbed cartoons go it can also feel incredibly goofy at times. Keep an eye out for a more complete review of the set coming soon.

Subspecies: The Complete Chronicles

Pitch: The original Twilight…

Why Rent? Radu (Anders Hove) is a pissed off vampire who returns to Bucharest to claim his father’s castle and comes face to face with his hybrid brother and three young women studying the folklore of the area including one he’s determined to make his own. The first film is almost worth renting for Laura Tate’s appearance alone. She’s the only one of the three that doesn’t end up showing her ta-tas, but she’s still quite the beauty. But if a really attractive actress isn’t enough for you the series is still good fun for fans of eighties monster horror. The Eastern European setting is fairly stunning at times, and the films hit all the right notes for semi-serious horror from the eighties.

Trancers: The Ultimate Deth Collection

Pitch: Seriously. There were five of these movies…

Why Rent? Tim Thomerson is Jack Deth, a cop from the future who’s sent back to eighties Earth to stop a time traveling baddie from Angel City. As if that’s not bad enough he also gets saddled with Helen Hunt… for three whole movies! Luckily he dodges that bullet for films four and five. Think of this as Timecop‘s low rent brother, and you’ll have a good idea of what to expect. Hunt aside, the movies are fun excursions into low budget sci-fi/action, and Thomerson is always worth watching.

Turkey Bowl

Pitch: Easily the most engaging and entertaining football film I’ve ever seen. Aside from The Replacements…

Why Rent? Ten friends reunite once a year for a game of touch football, but when two of them don’t show up two new faces join the teams. Over the course of one game presented (mostly) in real time we get to know these characters and their varied relationships. It’s only an hour long, but the characters manage to entertain and introduce themselves as well as a more traditional film could ever hope to do. Writer/director Kyle Smith has managed to make a sports film that appeals to viewers who couldn’t care less about sports. That’s a pretty damn impressive feat.

Twilight Dinner

Pitch: “What made you literally eat her pussy…”

Why Rent? Kazuhiko meets two sisters who move into his building and soon falls in love with the younger of the two. Unfortunately for him the women are vampires, and if he doesn’t watch his ass neck they’re going to make him one too. This is a pretty solid mash up of pink (Japanese sex) film and horror that is not for all tastes. The dirty stuff is frequent and suitably sexy, but when it morphs into horror things get really bloody really quick. The quote above for example goes from erotic to violent (and bloody and gross) in short order. An interesting watch from a constantly surprising international genre.

Bad Teacher

Pitch: I blame the teachers’ union for allowing this to happen…

Why Avoid? Elizabeth Halsey (Cameron Diaz) is on a quest for fake boobs, and the quickest way to accomplish her goal is to manipulate the system, lie, cheat, steal, and generally behave like a complete asshole. The ads for the film showed real promise and actually offered several laughs. Unfortunately, they were the only laughs in the movie. Halsey is a complete failure as a character as she’s never appealing as either a protagonist or antihero, and she doesn’t deserve any of the good things that come here way. Jason Segal is wasted here, and Justin Timberlake proves again that he doesn’t really act as much as he puts on a comedic persona. Skip it and go watch Teachers instead. Check out Robert Levin’s full review here.

A Better Life

Pitch: An important story blandly told…

Why Avoid? Carlos Galindo (Demian Bichir) is a hard working single dad who happens to be an illegal immigrant. His son doesn’t quite understand the extremes his father goes to to for him and makes things even more difficult, but when the father’s major investment is stolen the two come together in the hopes of recovering their future. Chris Weitz directs this story that never quite feels as important as it wants to. So much of it feels understated, and while Bichir’s performance and the film’s end reveal a rare honesty it’s just not enough to make the film worthwhile. Skip it and go watch The Terminal instead. Check out Landon Palmer’s full review here.

Red State

Pitch: I watched a review screener so you should probably ignore my thoughts…

Why Avoid? A group of friends looking for !SEX! willingly enter a trailer with a Melissa Leo and exit as prisoners of a religious fundamentalist cult with murderous cleansing on their little minds. ATF agents lay siege to the compound and soon everyone finds themselves with a one way ticket to hell. This is almost worth a watch to see Kevin Smith trying his hand at something completely different from the norm, but that doesn’t make up for the terrible script. The acting is solid from just about everyone including John Goodman and Michael Parks, but that doesn’t make up for the terrible script either. Skip it and go watch The House of the Devil instead. Check out Benji Carver’s full review here.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Armadillo
Freerunner
Hellraiser: Revelations
The Howling Reborn
Kevin Smith: Too Fat for 40
Kuroneko (Criterion)
Monte Carlo
The Robber
V: The Complete Second Season

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Erik the Viking (UK)

Erik (Tim Robbins) is a really nice guy, but he’s a pretty shitty viking. Weary of looting and pillaging, and having never really discovered a taste for rape, Erik convinces his fellow vikings to head to sea in search of the legendary Rainbow Bridge. In addition to featuring the funniest “rape” scene ever filmed, Terry Jones’ mash-up of ridiculous comedy and adventure is a lot of fun. It sits comfortably somewhere between Jabberwocky and Time Bandits, and fans of the Monty Python boys should give it a chance if they haven’t yet. Arrow Video’s new (re)release includes both the original theatrical cut and a much faster moving director’s son’s cut plus tons of extras. **NOTE – This is a region2 DVD which requires either a region-free player or the willingness to watch on your PC.**

Horrible Bosses

Pitch: It’s like a funny version of Throw Momma From the Train…

Why Buy? Three friends (Jason Bateman, Charlie Day, Jason Sudeikis) meet each night to commiserate about their terrible employers (Kevin Spacey, Jennifer Aniston, Colin Farrell), and finally decide their problems could be solved if they each killed the other one’s boss. Those first three are fantastic here, but that’s to be expected as they’re all funny guys. What surprises here though is the comedic brilliance on display from Spacey, Aniston, and especially Farrell. There are two versions hitting shelves with one containing an extra eight minutes of footage. I can’t vouch for those eight minutes as I haven’t seen them yet, but the remaining 90+ are damn funny.

The Trip

Pitch: The American version of this would feature Will Ferrell and Frank Caliendo…

Why Buy? A British newspaper asks Steve Coogan (as himself) to tour some fine restaurants outside of London and write about the experiences, but when his girlfriend gets too busy to go he’s forced to ask Rob Brydon (as himself) along for the ride. The result is a near perfect mix of comedy and pathos as the two trade quips, celebrity impressions, and insults all while offering brief glimpses into Coogan’s emotional turmoil. It’s a movie of course, but the conceit of actors playing themselves allows for a sincerity of emotion that would otherwise feel false. That welcome darkness aside, the film is hilarious and fans of laughter should seek it out immediately.

Beautiful Boy

Pitch: We can stop talking about Kevin now…

Why Rent? A normal couple (Michael Sheen and Maria Bello) with a college-age son are shocked numb when he shoots and kills dozens of fellow students before turning the gun on himself. Director/co-writer Shawn Ku’s film feels a bit on the nose at times as it works through the tragedy and the parents’ reactions, but there’s no denying the emotional pull of the topic. Sheen and Bello are also in top form as parents at a loss facing the loss, shame, guilt, and sadness that comes with such an event. As an added bonus the couple spends part of the film holed up with family in the form of the always awesome Alan Tudyk and Moon Bloodgood.

Devil’s Playground

Pitch: Remember that time you said zombie movies need more parkour? Well here ya go…

Why Rent? A zombie outbreak in London sees a disparate group of survivors band together to, well, go on surviving. Lucky for them their numbers include a few guys very familiar in the art of murder. This is a small scale apocalypse to be sure, but director Mark McQueen keeps things moving at a brisk pace and fills the screen with lots of vicious action and fairly gory bloodletting. It’s worth noting (again) that the zombies here are of the fast and extremely athletic variety and would feel right at home in a District 13 film, but that’s not a bad thing. The action plus the blood help make up for a fairly charisma-free cast.

Leap Year

Pitch: Let’s just pause to imagine that this is the Leap Year film Amy Adams chose to make last year…

Why Rent? Laura (Monica del Carmen) is depressed, lonely and at her wit’s end. She’s not doing too well socially or professionally and decides that this February 29th will be a special day preceded by a month of shacking up with anyone who’ll take her. Until one of her one night stands turns into a relationship of welcome abuse. This is bleak and sad filmmaking to be sure, but there’s something about Carmen’s brave and tortured performance that makes it watchable all the same. Fair warning, in addition to its generally adult subject matter the film is also fairly explicit in regard to sex.

Mr. Nice

Pitch: Not all drug dealers are mean spirited and facially scarred. They do all appear to have thick accents though…

Why Rent? Howard Marks (Rhys Ifans) is one of England’s most successful businessmen. Of course, his business is in dealing drugs, but you can’t choose your passion right? Director Bernard Rose has crafted a small and often uneventful biopic that skates by on easy going charm instead of real depth. It’s played straight for the most part, but some odd stylistic choices including Ifans playing his character from a teen onwards and the worst green-screen you’ve ever seen make the tone difficult to pin down. Still, it’s well-acted, casually fun and features the occasional naked lady too.

The Tree of Life

Pitch: May just be the prettiest screensaver you’re ever likely to see…

Why Rent? A possibly unhappy and mute man (Sean Penn) rides up and down elevators while reminiscing about a childhood populated with abusive fathers (Brad Pitt), slight mothers (Jessica Chastain), and younger brother who will eventually die. This is purportedly a film about all the wonders of life, but if this was all you knew about humanity you’d think we were one depressing as hell species. None of these fuckers are happy for more than a minute or two as instead we’re treated to anger, sadness, confusion, jealousy, and every other unflattering trait. So if the very tiny amount of story that is here is lame why rent it? Because it’s a beautiful goddamn movie. The visuals and score work in wondrous tandem to create an experience you don’t usually find in feature films. Sure that’s because most movies at least try to include a story, but still…

Green Lantern

Pitch: So he gets power from the ring, which in turn gets power from the lantern, which in turn gets power from…

Why Avoid? Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) is a cocky pilot with daddy issues when he’s called upon by a piece of jewelry to become a defender of the universe. Reynolds is a casually charismatic performer, but even he starts to annoy here. The biggest issue, aside from an abundance of mediocre and muffled CGI, is the attempt to make fear into something tangible. I know it’s part of the comic lore, but fear is far too abstract a concept to be measured by anything let alone an alien being and a ring. Martin Campbell and friends do get points for acknowledging the silliness of the mask though. Skip it and watch any of this past summer’s other superhero movies instead.

Terri

Pitch: Trim away everything but John C Reilly’s scenes and you’d have a fantastic short…

Why Avoid? An overweight and socially awkward teen (Jacob Wysocki) tries to navigate the wilds of high school with the help of a medicated uncle, an ambitious Assistant Principal (John C Reilly), and cute blonde girl (Olivia Crocicchia) open to being fingered in class. This attempt at indie comedy feels artificial from the beginning as so much of it is forced in its quest for a quirky feel. Reilly is the only real bright spot, but Crocicchia shows potential as a damaged teen. Both of them are drowned out though by the annoying sidekick constantly pulling his hair out and ruining every scene. Skip it and watch Lucas instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Arena
Bones: The Complete Sixth Season
The Child’s Eye
Chuck: The Complete Fourth Season
The Four Feathers (Criterion)
Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer
The Princess of Montpensier
Root of Evil
Snuffbox: The Complete Series
South of Heaven
Without Motive
Workaholics: Season One
Zookeeper

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Buck

Buck Brannaman has a special appreciation for the equine species that helps him understand and communicate with horses and their owners. He’s been labeled a real life “horse whisperer” and even assisted Robert Redford on his film of the same name, but his life wasn’t always a success story. This documentary takes a man and a subject so purely American and finds real heart, pain, and inspiration in the tale. All of it is engaging, but the bit towards the end about a damaged and violent colt is suspenseful and heartbreaking.

Fast Five

Pitch: I’m looking forward to Sexy Six…

Why Buy? The Fast and the Furious gang including Vin Diesel and Paul Walker head to Rio for some high speed robberies, but unfortunately for them Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson is hot on their trail. I’m no fan of the series, but this fourth sequel surprised the hell out of me with its pure bravado and adrenaline. It’s a dumb movie to be sure, and it has big problems in the script department, but the action is brilliantly executed by director Justin Lin. The rooftop foot-chase and third act robbery are reason alone to pick this one up… the sweaty bald man brawl is just a bonus. Check out my full review here.

Scream 4

Pitch: I scream you scream, we all scream 4 Schweddy Balls ice cream…

Why Buy? Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell) returns to Woodsboro on a book tour, and the killings come with her. Director Wes Craven and writer Kevin Williamson return too, and they manage to create the best Scream film since the original thanks in large part to a solid combination of laughs, bloody kills, and surprising twists. Courteney Cox and David Arquette are back for more and joined by newcomers Emma Roberts, Hayden Panettiere, Alison Brie, Adam Brody, and a Culkin. Check out my full review here.

White Wash

Pitch: You’re gonna feel pretty stupid about all those “black people don’t like Annette Funicello” jokes…

Why Buy? The topic of this new documentary is deceptively simple in its description as a film about African American surfers. What that log line fails to include is the history of institutionalized racism that the movie dissects as an explanation for the lack of blacks in the sport of surfing. It’s a fascinating example at how America’s tortured past can have a such an unexpected and distinct effect on something so seemingly unrelated. It’s educational and engaging whether you care about surfing or not, and it’s the kind of documentary that should be shown in schools.

Amer

Pitch: Sexiest ad for a straight razor ever…

Why Rent? The film is told in three segments, each more confusing and beguiling than the last, and essentially tells the story of a girl’s sexual awakening. The fact that it does so from within the Italian giallo genre that focuses on sexy women, glove wearing killers, and beautifully framed set pieces just makes it that much more intriguing. That said, it’s a slow moving movie. And if nothing else the DVD cover art is pretty damn spectacular even if it is a censored version of the European artwork. Check out my full review here.

Escape From Vampire Island

Pitch: Speaking of which, why haven’t we gotten a Fantasy Island movie yet…

Why Rent? Akira and his friends discover that his older brother who had been assumed dead is still alive on an island populated by vampires. So obviously they decide to head out there for an ill advised rescue mission. This Japanese import mixes some fairly bloody vampire action with poor attempts at comedy, but the end result remains an entertaining action horror film. The CGI is solid enough for its purpose, the girls are cute, and the blood flows freely. The damn thing is about thirty minutes too long though.

The High Cost of Living

Pitch: “This is the reason why your headache didn’t go away: That’s actually pronounced analgesic, not anal-gesic. Sir, the pills go in your mouth…”

Why Rent? A drug dealer (Zach Braff) and a pregnant married woman (Isabelle Blais) cross paths when he hits her with his car and flees the scene. Guilt leads him to follow up with her and the two soon form an oddly affecting bond. Braff is hit or miss when it comes to drama due largely to the way his voice goes soft and slightly higher in pitch whenever he tries to talk “serious.” Seriously. I love Garden State, but that stretch towards the end where he spills his heart and concerns to Natalie Portman? How do you not laugh at him? Anyway. He manages to act honestly heartfelt and real here, as does Blais, and their story is never less than engaging.

Phase 7

Pitch: Somehow I missed Phases one through six…

Why Rent? An apartment building in Argentina is put under quarantine trapping the residents within. It begins like the fantastically scary Spanish horror film [Rec] but quickly shifts gears from terror to black comedy. The laughs are of the darkly comic variety as the movie becomes an absurd look at neighborly relationships under stressful conditions. It’s a virus that leads to the situation, but the residents soon start dropping for entirely different reasons. Check out my full review here.

Submarine

Pitch: “This is the moment where you leave him and come with me…”

Why Rent? Oliver Tate (Craig Roberts) is a peculiar teenager trapped in an absurdly normal life. He has a new girlfriend who he doesn’t understand, parents on the verge of breaking up, and a next door neighbor (Paddy Considine) with a mullet and a van. Writer/director Richard Ayoade, he of The IT Crowd, has turned in a sweet, funny, and charming film that some have described incorrectly as Wes Anderson lite. Check out Landon Palmer’s full review here.

Grandview USA

Pitch: You know it was made in the 80′s because Jamie Lee Curtis shows her wonderful assets…

Why Avoid? C. Thomas Howell plays a high school graduate whose interests don’t quite match up to his family and town’s ideals, while Jamie Lee Curtis and Patrick Swayze work at the local demolition derby. The two stories bear a tenuous and forced connection, but they feel unavoidably distinct. Worse, neither half is all that interesting. This is the first time the film has been available on DVD, but it’s so flat and uneventful that only really big fans of the actors may want to give it a chance. Skip it and watch Red Dawn instead.

The Presence

Pitch: Mira Sorvino is haunted by the ghost of her past career…

Why Avoid? A woman (Mira Sorvino) heads to an isolated island cabin where she spent much of her childhood, but when her boyfriend joins her a ghostly visitor begins to disturb their vacation. There are a couple cool touches here, but they’re drowned out by a lack of energy and the ridiculous overuse of a specific image. Shane West plays the ghost, and the first twenty minutes alone shows him standing silently in a corner or a window roughly fifteen times. What should be a creepy vision instead becomes repetitive and comical, and that combined with a nonsensical script make for a slog of a thriller. Skip it and watch The Changeling instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

Bored to Death: The Complete Second Season
The Heart Specialist
Jig
The League: The Complete Season Two
Lie to Me: The Complete Final Season
Sarah Palin: The Undefeated

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?

As always, if you see something you like, click on the image to buy it.

Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky

Ricky is a young man with incredible martial arts skills. He’s fast and agile, but more importantly he can rip your innards from your body with deadly precision. This decades old Hong Kong flick is over the top ridiculous in the violence and gore on display and not coincidentally is awesome. There’s more bloodletting and gore than you’ll find in the average horror film. Disemboweling, eyeball violence, cuts, head smashing, and more fill the screen with a crimson colored glee. Sure it rarely looks exactly real, but goddamn is it entertaining. The film’s been around for some time, but if you don’t own a copy this latest reissue is the perfect time to fix that.

Adventure Time: My Two Favorite People

Pitch: Imagine Calvin & Hobbes with less heart and more absurdity…

Why Buy? Finn and Jake the dog are best friends who spend their days battling wizards and monsters and flying through the air on a sugar high. They have noodle-like appendages and incredible imaginations, and they are funny as hell. The DVD contains episodes from the first two seasons, and while they’re short on time they’re long on laughs. There’s also no shortage of absurdity as the rules of their world are fairly non-existent.

Buster Keaton: Battling Butler/Go West

Pitch: Diane Keaton‘s father does crazy stuff in black and white…

Why Buy? Haven‘t seen this one yet, but the combination of Buster Keaton and the Kino Classics label automatically make it a must own release. They’ve remastered both films in HD and packed the 2-disc release with fantastic extras including a short film, an audio recording of Keaton, and more. And I’m clearly kidding about the Diane Keaton bit. She’s not quite that old.

Carlos (Criterion)

Pitch: It’s even better than the Bruce Willis/Richard Gere version…

Why Rent? A Venezuelan revolutionary named Ilich Ramirez Sánchez (Édgar Ramírez) transforms himself in the media eye into a terrorist for the people. His ego and enemies eventually get the best of him, but his journey is a fascinating look at ambition, greed, and the shifting winds of political ideology. This European miniseries is an interesting exploration of the man, and while it only really excites periodically Ramírez makes the entire thing engaging.

Hung: The Complete Second Season

Pitch: Like Kevin Bacon…

Why Rent? HBO’s small world drama about a high school coach who moonlights as a male prostitute continues with more sexual hijinx, shenanigans, and the old in and out. Thomas Jane still excels in the lead role and shows a great mix of real comedic skill and honest heart. The show is definitely one of the cable network’s lower profile productions, but it’s still a fun, entertaining, and occasionally heartfelt watch.

Vampires, Mummies & Monsters (Roger Corman’s Cult Classics)

Pitch: Oh my…

Why Rent? This new four film collection from Shout! Factory includes Lady Frankenstein, The Velvet Vampire, Time Walker, and Grotesque. The movies are spread across two discs and include varied extra features, but the highlight has to be the extended cut of Lady Frankenstein. Much like Frankenstein’s monster it’s a patchwork job consisting the original film and various additional scenes from numerous sources added back in to the film. The other entry worth watching is Linda Blair’s Grotesque which may just be one of the earliest meta horror films. Doesn’t make it good necessarily, but it makes it interesting.

Viva Riva!

Pitch: It’s about time Africa started contributing more than just diamonds, oil, and AIDS to the global economy…

Why Rent? A young thug named Riva falls for the wrong girl and winds up the target of a much bigger gangster named Cesar. His efforts to make money and get the girl meet with some hefty and bloody resistance. This is a rare action pic from Africa, the Democratic Republic of Congo specifically, and it is a surprisingly fun watch. It also has an incredibly sexy feel about it, particularly when Viva and Nora spend some bathtub time together.

American Loser

Pitch: See what they did with the title there? They’re hoping you’ll think Seann William Scott has returned for the 17th American Pie sequel…

Why Avoid? A young woman (Gretchen Mol) sets her sights on a misguided young man (Seann William Scott) in an attempt to make a profit by helping him clean up his act. Comedy is subjective so opinions from others should probably be disregarded immediately, but this is not funny. There’s potential for romantic drama here, but half the cast isn’t really up to the challenge. Mol is fine (and deserves better fare), but Scott simply plays a toned down version of every other character he’s ever played. Skip it and watch Trading Places instead.

Dead Cert

Pitch: Did someone order a British gangster/vampire combo? Fools…

Why Avoid? A group of mobsters come up against a rival gang and lose control of their club on a wager, but when they decide to fight to win it back they realize these gangsters are packing more than cockney accents. They’re vampires! The idea of mixing these two genres may feel right, but if it didn’t work for John Landis and Innocent Blood either. The gangster part is almost competent, but the vampire storyline is dull. Skip it and watch Layer Cake and Lost Boys instead.

The Ledge

Pitch: Patrick Wilson make you, jump, jump. His god will make you, jump, jump…

Why Avoid? A young man (Charlie Hunnam) stands on a ledge and tells his story to the worst police officer in the world (Terrence Howard). It seems he has to jump at noon exactly or Steven Tyler’s daughter will be found dead with a ball gag in her mouth. Cue the “deep” conversations about faith, belief, and the importance of not being a dumbass. All involved are competent actors, but you wouldn’t know it by their performances here. Hunnam sucks, Howard over does every line, Patrick Wilson rants, and poor Tyler continues to play these inconsequential characters who only exist as property of men. Skip it and watch Cat’s Eye instead.

Also out this week, but I haven’t seen the movie/TV show, review material was unavailable, and I have no blind opinion:

The Butcher the Chef and the Swordsman
The Cleveland Show: The Complete Season Two
CSI: The Eleventh Season
CSI Miami: The Ninth Season
CSI NY: The Seventh Season
Good Neighbors
How I Met Your Mother: The Complete Season 6
Law and Order SVU: The 12th Year
The Middle: Season 2
The Phantom Carriage (Criterion)

Read More: This Week in DVD

What are you buying on DVD this week?