Film School Rejects » David Hartman

Nicolas Cage Signs On To 3D Action Movie

David Hartman — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 12:59:25 +0000

Nicolas Cage has signed on to star in Drive Angry, a revenge movie directed by Patrick Lussier. Cage will star as a man chasing down the people who killed his wife and daughter, with the violence escalating with each death. I know it sounds ridiculous, and that’s because it probably will be ridiculous. It sounds a bit like Mad Max, Death Race 2000, and Rolling Vengeance rolled into one. That’s right, Rolling Vengeance, look it up. It’s great 80’s cheese. And intentionally cheesy is exactly how this is going to have to be for it to be bearable.

Now, I would like to think since Patrick Lussier, director of this year’s campfest My Bloody Valentine, is at the helm, it should be cheesy fun. Who knows, perhaps even another full monty performance by Betsy Rue is in store. However, since it will star Nicolas Cage, I imagine the movie trying to take itself too seriously, or at least Mr. Cage will. If anyone does drop $14 to see Drive Angry, and Nicolas Cage ends up acting like he’s Brando, then Drive Angry is exactly what a lot of people will be doing when they leave the theater.

But seriously, as long as we can get some gore with a side of nudity to go along with our 3D glasses, Drive Angry should be watchable. Right?

Hollywood Presents Your Average High School

David Hartman — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 22:49:03 +0000

Throughout the history of cinema, actors, writers and directors have brought us very different views of what it’s like to be in high school. Some concepts are humorous, some are sad, others are downright scary. But how accurate is the portrayal of high school in movies? What if there was a high school that combined the different versions of the way film portrays high school?

In honor of the release of American Teen last Friday, we sought to answer that question – to see what our first day at Hollywood’s Average High School would be like if the world existed according to movies.

9:00 A.M. Welcome to your new high school! You sit in Principal Ratimer’s office as he rambles on about his policy on how he’s come in to rid the school of violence and drugs even though the town was voted one of the safest cities in America. He hands you your class schedule with a suspicious look and you’re on your way.

9:15 A.M. Heading down the hallway, you’re slightly confused and frightened as you watch two stoners and a guy dressed like Napoleon Bonaporte pass you. You find your class and go inside, handing your pass to the teacher, Mr. Escalante. After scanning the class for an open seat you eventually plant yourself around three girls, all of whom are named Heather. They spend most of the period cutting you down.

10:30 A.M. The bells rings, and you’re off to your next class: P.E. Once in the locker room, everyone starts to clique up as they suit up. The noise level in the locker room seems to coincide with popularity. The nerds with high socks and short shorts are speaking at an audible whisper, while what appears to be greasers, toss their stilettos and combs into their lockers, and change into their gym clothes while smoking cigarettes, all while talking about rumbling. Then, on the opposite side of the locker room, the loud foulmouthed football players push each other around and fight over who gets to peek through the hole that looks into the girl’s locker room. You can’t help but feel a little out of place already, and it’s only your second class. And to make things worse, by the end of P.E., you’ve already been given detention for not having a P.E. uniform, even though you were never issued one.

11:30 A.M. After gym class is lunch, and things just get crazier. You try not to stare at the kid filming a plastic bag as you try to find a place to sit. Walking through the middle of the quad you pass girls in 90s designer clothing, smacking on gum, twirling their hair, and droning on about shoes.

Instantly, you head the opposite direction to get away and you find yourself stopped by a chain link fence at the edge of campus. Here, there are a group of kids secretly being taught how to dance. You ask them why they need to be so covert about their training, and the leader, a kid who appears to be at least four years removed from high school, informs you that dancing is outlawed in the town. Upon hearing this you begin to question their sanity. Beyond the dancers and beyond the fence, in front of a house across the street from the school, a kid in a trench coat holds a stereo over his head.

You turn and run until you find an empty corner of the campus and you finish your lunch there. Every class after lunch is just as strange: nerds with pocket protectors; a gang of kids from some violent, crazed veteran-led dojo; a shirtless surfer ordering pizzas during History; teachers who seem to know less than the students.

12:45 P.M. When you look out the window during biology, you notice another group of greasers. These ones appear to be a little less menacing as they sing and dance on top of their cars. You scramble to close the blinds, grabbing the attention of the class and causing a minor scene.

1:50 P.M. During computer class, you attempt to make conversation with the two guys sitting next to you. However, you are quickly made uneasy about their sincerity in making the perfect woman with their sweet new 386 system. They ignore your attempts to explain how their plan makes no sense.

2:10 P.M. The bell signaling the end of the day finally rings, and you step through the front door just as you remember that you still have detention to attend. You stand on the front steps of the school, contemplating skipping out. An old Ferrari pulls up to the front of the school. The kid driving hops out, runs past you and into the school. From where you’re standing, you can hear a DJ named Hard Harry on the Ferrari’s radio lament about the state of our society. You decide to not make your first day any worse and head towards the detention hall.

2:15 P.M. You’re the first one to arrive. You find a desk in the middle of the room and wait for the cacophony of weirdness that you know will be joining you.

Eventually you are joined by a greaser named Dallas, one of the seven star quarterbacks the school seems to have, one of the nerds from the locker room, a coke-snorting socialite and a skinny, redheaded loner.

You do your best not to make eye contact with these people. You’ve reached the threshold of all you can handle after the redheaded weirdo, in response to one of the socialite’s insults, moves a book off a shelf with her mind. You run screaming down the hallway toward the front door of the school, wishing you were back home in Shermer, Illinois, where things were much more normal.

Well there you have it – seems like most high schools. Who didn’t hang out with the town’s mad scientist, or randomly break out in to song and dance? Hollywood may be able to capture some of those adolescent feelings of rebellion, loneliness, or time travel, but if high school was actually the way they portrayed it, it would be a lot more like a bad dream. And you’d probably be naked in it. Ready to transfer?

Ten Movies That Will Keep You Indoors

David Hartman — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 22:05:31 +0000

I don’t know about you, but where I live it is really hot in the summer. I step out of my front door, and I feel as if my apartment is about a stone’s throw away from Hell – like I’m about to live out the scene from Total Recall when Arnie’s mask breaks on Mars. I’ve already taken in enough of the Sun for the summer. It’s hot, it’s humid, it’s downright oppressive. If it’s hot where you live, and you’re tired of the summer Sun’s ‘warm glowing warming glow’, but you’re one of those people who still feels they haven’t got all they can out of summer and it’s relentless, unforgiving, soul-crushing heat, here are ten movies you can watch that’ll help keep you indoors.

10. Zodiac

In 1968 and 1969, the events surrounding the Zodiac Killer were enough to keep many Bay Area and Northern California residents indoors. David Fincher’s graphic depiction of the mysterious, masked murder who struck mostly couples is enough to scare many people from going outside today.

9. A Scanner Darkly

Richard Linklater’s rotoscoped adaptation of Philip K. Dick’s nightmarish vision of the future, where the two hemispheres of drugs and the government have fused into one, almost makes the viewer feel like they are on Substance D. Add in an Orwellian society that is constantly under surveillance, and it’s impossible not to get a little paranoid about going outside.

8. Se7en

The second Fincher movie on this list is fiction, but is equally disturbing and frightening. The gritty detective story about the hotheaded, go-getting rookie, and the burnt-out, soon-to-retire veteran hunting a vicious serial killer whose victims are perpetrators of the Seven Deadly Sins leaves the viewer emotionally kicked in the gut. While the victims in the movie are the extreme epitomes of each sin, it creates a fear inside the viewer when they realize that, in one way or another, they too, are guilty of the sins.

7. The Birds

Alfred Hitchcock, the master of making you paranoid over the smallest things. The smallest things with talons. Now we can’t see a flock of the damn things without imagining they’re plotting to kill us, and it’s enough to keep us indoors.

6. Nineteen Eighty-Four

Orwell’s vision of a dystopian society constantly under the watchful eye of a totalitarian government is downright frightening. And thinking about it can send one deep into a rabbit hole of paranoia until you feel like you’re being watched at all times. And who knows? You just might be. The government probably already knows you’re reading FSR right now.

5. Night of the Living Dead

It’s tough to decide which zombie movie to mention on this list. Because the intention, and result, of most zombie movies is to do just that: scare you into being afraid to go outside. But Night of the Living Dead makes it on the list because, while it is not the first zombie movie, it is the first one to feature the modern zombie that George Romero created.

4. My Girl

It scared me when I was a kid, and it still scares me today. The thought of being killed by bee stings has scarred me thanks to My Girl, and I’m not even allergic to bee stings. Or cooties.

3. Arachnophobia

While staying inside the house may not curb the fear of the deadly spiders, since they kill outdoors, too, it’s best to play it safe by staying indoors. Going outside to mow the lawn, trim the hedges, or going to the shed in the backyard could result in being poisoned and devoured by eight-legged beasties. In fact, you should avoid household chores altogether.

2. Deliverance

Even without Ned Beatty’s pig-squealing rape scene, which is easily one of the most disturbing scenes in movie history, the horrifying chain of events that occur along the river in Deliverance is enough to scare anyone into not only forgoing any canoing trips, but avoiding camping completely.

1. Jaws

The ultimate summer movie and the ultimate “Keep you Indoors” movie. When it was released in 1975, people were scared of going to the beach, even in areas that weren’t inhabited by sharks. Today, being in the ocean and even thinking about the attacks in Jaws will still make me uneasy.

So there you have it. If you are still harboring some foolish plans to get outside and break a sweat under those terrifying UVA and UVB rays, watch any one of these movies, and they’ll have you thinking twice. Make some popcorn, and stay inside where it’s safe.

Kate Beckinsale Has a New Found Respect for Journalists

David Hartman — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 20:24:37 +0000

In a recent interview with MTV, Kate Beckinsale stated that she has a new found respect for journalists due to her upcoming role in Nothing But The Truth, where she portrays a journalist who is sentenced for not revealing her source after exposing a CIA operative.

According to Beckinsale, she is not playing Judith Miller, (who exposed Valerie Plame as a CIA operative in 2003, and was subsequently imprisoned for refusing to reveal her source) but her character is bit like Judith Miller. So, basically, she’s playing Judith Miller.

The upcoming political drama is written and directed by Rod Lurie. He is a former journalist who is known for his political-centric stories. Nothing But the Truth, due out next year, will have Alan Alda, David Schwimmer, and Edie Falco alongside the British leading lady.

Of course, there is something a bit frustrating about this film. If the purpose of the story is to portray Judith Miller (and lets be honest, this is about Judith Miller) as the victim, I will be very disappointed and just downright infuriated. She should in no way be commended for her actions. Miller did nothing more than irresponsibly expose Valerie Plame as a CIA operative in a petty retaliation against Plame’s husband’s report that the Bush Administration possibly misled the country into going to war with Iraq.

But, maybe I’m just getting irritated over this for no reason. Rod Lurie might portray the story in a completely opposite way. Although, when was the last time a biopic about a journalist featured the main character in a bad light?

Spy Movie Babes: The Hottest Femme Fatales

David Hartman — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 14:00:04 +0000

Throughout history men have been persuaded by seductive women. Important and powerful men have met their fate by the hands of a dangerous beauty; a succubus; a femme fatale. From Delilah and Sampson, to Judith and Holofernes, to Yoko and John, men have been weakened by the beauty of a dangerous woman. Many nations, especially during the Cold War, trained and employed agents to use their sensuous charms as a means of obtaining information. And in the process of art imitating life, filmmakers used the beautiful, dangerous woman to it’s benefit. While Agent 99 is a spy, and is most certainly sexy, she doesn’t quite have that element of danger, seductiveness, or just downright hotness that some covert women have had. I would like to pay tribute, with special consideration outside of the Bond realm, to the hottest spy movie femme fatales.

**Fiona Volpe – Thunderball (1965)**

Italian redhead Luciana Paluzzi’s portrayal of Fiona Volpe is an undeniably classic femme fatale. The SPECTRE assassin blows up a car while riding her missile launcher-equipped motorcycle. After seducing Mr. Bond in his hotel bathtub, she lets in fellow SPECTRE assassin Vargas, with the intent of eliminating Bond, or at least capturing so their boss can reveal his master plan. Paluzzi’s character was recreated as Fatima Blush for the non-EON production of Never Say Never Again in 1983. Blush was played by Barbara Carrera, but was just not as hot as the leatherclad firetop from Thunderball.

**Shakka Holland – Nighthawks (1981)**

While Nighthawks may be more of a terrorist movie than a spy movie, and being in a Stallone movie generally won’t land you on any tribute lists, the beautfiul international terrorist Shakka Holland, played by the late Indian model Persis Khambatta, is certainly both beautiful and dangerous. She is just as ruthless as her counterpart played by Rutger Hauer. So, she meets a couple of the prerequisites for a femme fatale. Also, Shakka Holland makes the list for killing someone with the same last name as me.

**Dierde – Ronin (1998)**

The IRA agent played by Natascha McElhone has a past, like the rest of the ex-operatives in the Frankenheimer film, that is unkown. However, the viewer gathers, from what is presented, that Dierdre is a killing machine. She is devoted to her Northern Irish cause, handles weapons well, and is an excellent getaway driver, and is sexy while doing all of those things. Sexy in a believable way, too. She is tall, athletic and has a tomboy appeal to her. And while she may not use sexuality and charm to her full advantage, opting for gunplay instead foreplay, she does capture the heart of De Niro’s character just enough to let her escape.

**Jeannette the Dutch Assassin – Munich (2005)**

Prior to meeting his demise, one of her victims is warned by his partner, “Beware of the local honey trap”. However, the power and charm of the femme fatale proved too much for the aging Mossad agent. In the small amount of screen time Jeannette the Dutch Assassin has in the nearly 3 hour film, the entrancing siren, played by Marie-Josée Croze, manages to ensnare and kill one of the Israeli agents, and have a nude scene.

**Juno Skinner – True Lies (1994)**

Back when Tia Carrere was a little hotter, and could get work, she played an antiquities dealer who was assisting terrorists in arms smuggling. Harry Tasker, played by the Governor of California, perfectly sums up her character when he describes her as a “psychopathic bitch”. But, the psychopathic femme fatale was no match for a housewife in a tight dress during a ridiculous hand-to-hand fight in the back of a speeding limousine with a dead driver.

**Nikita – La Femme Nikita (1990)**

It was hard choose between Nikita or Maggie from Point of No Return. If the choice was based on how I feel about the movie, then it wouldn’t have been hard to choose, because Point of No Return was terrible. But it is based on just the hot femme fatale herself, and Bridget Fonda was definitely hot in Point of No Return. But there’s something about the seductive, French girl with a gun that I find sexier.

**Xenia Onatopp – Goldeneye (1995)**

Xenia Onatopp, played by Famke Janssen, is the quintessential example of a femme fatale. Female, beautiful, dangerous, and seductive. Not only does she use carnal desire as a way to trap her victim, but she also uses it to kill, crushing her coital partner with her thighs while still getting off. It’s a bit over the top, but it’s a Bond movie, so it’s acceptable. Plus, that’s how she likes it.

**Mata Hari – Mata Hari (1931)**

Mata Hari, the name synonymous with the femme fatale. The real life Mata Hari was born Margaretha Geertruida Zelle. She was a Dutch exotic dancer and prostitute that Greta Garbo looked nothing like. But that didn’t matter in 1931, and it often doesn’t matter today. What’s important is that Greta Garbo was hot. She’s even gorgeous by today’s standards, or maybe just my standards. During World War I, Mata Hari was convicted of spying for Germany and was executed by firing squad in 1917. There is still a lot of speculation to whether or not her spying is true, and that she may have been used as a scapegoat.

**Pussy Galore – Goldfinger (1964)**

Pussy is often ranked as one of the top Bond Girls, and is certainly one of the top spy movie femme fatales. The sultry, blonde-haired Honor Blackman portrayed Pussy Galore at 37 years old, making her the oldest woman to play a Bond Girl. She was also older than Mr. Bond himself, who was 34. In the documentary Bond Girls Are Forever, Blackman notes that she knew Ian Fleming had written Galore as a lesbian. And considering the way Honor Blackman looked in 1964, a lesbian Pussy Galore is pretty hot, too.

What femme fatales would be on your list?

Millennium Films Developing New ‘Three Musketeers’

David Hartman — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 02:31:26 +0000

Millennium Films recently acquired Alexandre Dumas’ “Three Musketeers” with plans on adapting it in to at least one feature film. Millennium’s Rambo grossed over $100 million earlier this year, and since then the production company has been snatching up other classic titles for possible remakes, including Conan, Hercules, and Buck Rogers.

Dumas’ novel has been in the public domain for years and has been adapted at least 50 times. The adaptation Millenium Films plans to produce will be a prequel to the classic novel, showing how Athos, Porthos and Aramis initially bonded and became the Three Musketeers. After the prequel, they’ll develop a film based on the novel. As a fan of the novel, I’m interested in seeing the back-story they develop. Hopefully, Millenium Films’ rendition will be less Disney and family oriented. I would love to see the Musketeers tale done as a realistic period piece, sticking to the violence, betrayal and sensuality of Dumas’ story. And if that second film happens, although they do seem to be getting ahead of themselves by planning it now, hopefully it will be true to the epic 19th Century novel. Athos, Porthos, and Aramis were the rebels of the musketeers, always playing by their own rules and being vehemently verbally reprimanded by their superior. It’s a lot like every movie detective since, well, ever.

Source: Collider

PT Anderson Possibly on ‘Power Play’

David Hartman — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 00:29:07 +0000

Word around the campfire is that Jack Nicholson is attached to what is possibly Paul Thomas Anderson’s next film, Power Play, a story about a Native American casino owner who takes on his Las Vegas rivals. There is no official word on this, though.

The potential film’s original story comes from a novella written by the editor-in-chief of Variety, Peter Bart. In 1998, Paramount Pictures acquired the rights to Bart’s novella for producer Robert Evans to develop. During this time, Bart became the subject of harsh criticism when he was accused of writing the 86-page novella for the sole purpose of selling a screenplay, as a way to get around a rule that prohibits Variety reporters from selling screenplays while on the job. Variety reported that the novella was submitted to Paramount under a pseudonym to avoid a conflict of interest. Considering Bart once worked with Robert Evans at Paramount Pictures, I can certainly see where there might be a conflict of interest.

However, regardless of the controversy involving the story, if this is truly Anderson’s next film, I am already excited about it. Not because of it’s plot involving casinos, or Native Americans, or that courtside lunatic from Lakers games, but because it’s PT Anderson. Whatever he delivers next, I expect to be gold. Although, since all of this is 100% rumor, there is a good chance it will never happen.

Source: Cigarettes and Redvines

Darko Productions Backing ‘Beer in Hell’

David Hartman — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 01:25:20 +0000

According to Variety, Richard Kelly’s Darko Productions has agreed to produce the film adaptation of Tucker Max’s bestselling “fratire”, “I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell”.

Published in 2006, the book’s humorous, gonzo-style stories document Max’s many episodes of excessive behavior. Since the book’s release, Max, a self-proclaimed “asshole” and a guy you hate to like, has created a cult following of twenty-something males. He continues to recount stories of self-indulgence on his website, and Simon & Shuster plan to release a sequel to the book in November.

The film will be based on one specific story from the book, “The Austin Road Trip Story”. The story follows Tucker and his friends on a road trip to Austin to celebrate a friend’s bachelor party. While in Austin, he abandons his buddies for sex, and after being banned from the wedding he attempts work his way back in to his friends’ good graces.

Bob Gosse has signed on to direct, and production is scheduled to begin in Shreveport, La., early next month. Max wrote the screenplay with Nils Parker, and I fully expect the crude, frank, and sometimes, disgusting nature of Max’s stories to be showcased in the film. Watering down the outrageous nature of his stories would be disappointing. And avoiding homogenization seems to be the reason Max went with Darko. On his website, Max stated, “We went with Darko over everyone else for many reasons, the main one being exactly what I wrote about here: They not only ‘got’ the creative vision behind the movie, but they were basically the only company that, when I talked to them, I didn’t feel I was dealing with financiers, I felt I was talking to actual artists.”

As long as Darko and Gosse don’t shy away from the true nature of Max’s stories it should be, at least on a shallow level, pretty funny.

Bruce Willis Wants to Give ‘Kane & Lynch’ a Shot

David Hartman — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 09:00:50 +0000

Variety is reporting that Bruce Willis is interested in starring in the film adaptation of Eidos Interactive’s video game Kane & Lynch: Dead Men. Presuming newcomer Kyle Ward’s script follows the game’s basic storyline, the film will follow death row inmate Adam ‘Kane’ Marcus’ alliance with schizophrenic murderer James Lynch in order to seek revenge upon the men who killed his wife.

Veteran stunt coordinator Simon Crane will direct the film, making this his directorial debut. In the past 15 years Crane has worked as a stunt coordinator on such films as Braveheart, Saving Private Ryan, and the upcoming Hancock.

Eidos Interactive, whose hit action game has sold more than 1 million copies, sold the rights to Lionsgate before the game’s release back in November 2007. Though not well received, most critics agreed the game delivered a compelling story. While his directorial skills may be unknown, Simon Crane, who is responsible for putting together some of the greatest stunts and action scenes in film history, will likely have no problem bringing the game’s fights and shootouts to the big screen.

Along with the interest of Bruce Willis to play Kane, Billy Bob Thornton is rumored to be in consideration for the role of his under-medicated, schizophrenic partner, Lynch. While most video game adaptations are disappointments, I’ll go out on a limb and say it’ll be better than Bandits.

Film School Rejects » David Hartman

Nicolas Cage Signs On To 3D Action Movie

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Hollywood Presents Your Average High School

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Ten Movies That Will Keep You Indoors

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Kate Beckinsale Has a New Found Respect for Journalists

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Spy Movie Babes: The Hottest Femme Fatales

**Fiona Volpe – Thunderball (1965)**

**Shakka Holland – Nighthawks (1981)**

**Dierde – Ronin (1998)**

**Jeannette the Dutch Assassin – Munich (2005)**

**Juno Skinner – True Lies (1994)**

**Nikita – La Femme Nikita (1990)**

**Xenia Onatopp – Goldeneye (1995)**

**Mata Hari – Mata Hari (1931)**

**Pussy Galore – Goldfinger (1964)**

Related Reading:

Millennium Films Developing New ‘Three Musketeers’

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PT Anderson Possibly on ‘Power Play’

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Darko Productions Backing ‘Beer in Hell’

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Bruce Willis Wants to Give ‘Kane & Lynch’ a Shot

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